


One Day at a Time

by kcat1971



Series: Transitions [9]
Category: The West Wing
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Drama & Romance, F/M, Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-13 21:05:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 35
Words: 70,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14120820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kcat1971/pseuds/kcat1971
Summary: The Inauguration is over and the Santos Administration officially begins, but Donna & Josh have some personal issues to face.





	1. Chapter 1

I first open my eyes at 6. I'm not surprised. My body is used to getting up at the same time every day even if it is after only four hours of sleep. I roll over and snuggle with Donna and close my eyes again, hoping for a little more rest.

Now, its almost 7:30. That's about five and a half hours sleep. Not too bad. I'll take that hour and a half bonus. I should get up for my 8a.m. meeting with Ron, but since its just in the basement, I can lay here a little longer and enjoy having Donna in my arms and spend a little time thinking about yesterday.

It was truly an amazing day- definitely top 5. Right up there with our Wedding and Honeymoon, I'm sure it will drop in standing once we have kids. Speaking of which, I wonder if we conceived. That would be pretty cool. We could have a baby by fall. The thought brings a smile to my face. A year ago I'd never have expected to feel this way. Things were pretty dismal. What a difference a year can make!

I run my hand down Donna's hair lightly. I don't want to wake her. She really needs a full night sleep and I'd sort of like to meet with Ron without her for a little while. When I made an appointment for 8am I was pretty sure she'd still be asleep. I leave her a note, just in case, and head down to the basement.

"Thanks for meeting with me so early after last nights activities." I tell Ron.

"This is what I do."

"I just feel bad for pulling you away from your home on a Sunday."

"I mean this is what I do, Josh. My kids are grown and my wife has been gone for quite a while. This is what I do."

Ah. I didn't know that. In a way I feel worse. But it does explain why it seems like he's always here.

"So, Josh, why did you want to meet this morning without Donna?" Ron looks at me like he already knows the answer.

"What did you mean yesterday when you said 'I didn't see what she was like after Rosslyn?'"

People don't talk to me about Rosslyn. Even the name is rarely mentioned in my presence, and I'll be honest. I'm kind of curious. Ron looks at me evenly. I feel like he's taking measure of my frame of mind. I guess he decides that I'm ready to hear this because he begins talking.

"Do you know that she watched your surgery?"

"Yes, she said that Dr. Bartlet was able to take her into an observation room they use for students."

"Donna was practically catatonic in the waiting room. Dr. Bartlet just wanted her to be able to see you. To see that you were still alive. But once they let her into the observation room, she wouldn't leave. She _stood_ there, not moving, for _twelve_ hours. She wouldn't eat, wouldn't drink, wouldn't sleep. It was like she believed that she could keep you alive by sheer force of will."

Maybe she did, I think to myself. God, I hate to think about what she was going through. But Ron's not done yet.

"When the surgery was done and they wheeled you out of the OR, she turned to Dr. Bartlet and said 'What's next?' Dr. Bartlet said you'd be in recovery for several hours. She gave Donna a choice- either eat something and rest or be sedated with an IV. At first Donna refused, she said 'I'll eat when he can,' but Dr. Bartlet convinced her that she had to eat and sleep or she wouldn't be able to take care of you. She told Donna that it would be bad for your recovery if you were worried about her. That's what finally got through to her. Dr. Bartlet pulled some strings to get Donna access to a family overnight room. While you were in recovery, she took a four hour nap. Then she took a shower and changed. Then they allowed her to sit beside you in ICU. As one of my agents put it, 'she resumed her vigil.' She didn't leave your side until your Mom got there. The ICU only allowed one visitor at a time, so your Mom was able to convince Donna to take a few rest breaks. "

"It's funny. I know that my Mom was there too, but I remember that Donna was always there. Every time I woke up she was there."  
"Was she sleeping?" He asks me, although I know he knows the answer.  
"Not usually."  
"Did you ever see her eating?"  
"No. Not until I was finally allowed solids." I'm starting to "see" what they saw, but Ron's still getting me up to speed.

"Donna didn't leave the hospital the first week. When Dr. Bartlet noticed that Donna was losing weight she started literally forcing Donna to drink a protein shake or eat something in her presence. Dr. Bartlet is the one who insisted on an extra agent on your detail then. One to follow Donna any time she left your room. It wasn't often. Once you went home, things got a little better and a little worse. She was eating a little more, because she was bringing you food. But since you were alert enough to want to work, she was going back and forth between your home and your office, to keep it running and to bring things back to you. That's when we assigned her a driver as well. We told her it was part of your detail, and technically it was. Donna was managing your recovery and your office on very little sleep and very little food. It really wasn't safe for her to be driving. Someone had to watch out for her. We all just expected her to drop one day, but she just kept going. I've never seen anyone as strong as her. I still don't know how she did it, but I do know one thing. Donna Moss can do anything that she sets her mind to."

"Donna Moss Lyman," I say automatically even as I nod my head in agreement. She really is capable of anything. Ron's mouth quirks up.  
"Yes. We are all glad you finally got that sorted out."  
"Thanks for watching out for her, Ron."

"Our pleasure. I only told you all this so you would understand, Donna has a special place in my heart, as well as the hearts of all the agents that know her. I promise you, we'll do everything we can to keep her safe. In any scenario, we'll err on the side of protection."

"Okay, then we are in complete agreement about that. So, where are we in the investigation?"

"Well, I have some disturbing news. The analyst reviewing Donna's email found one that had gone to her Spam folder unopened. It's a scan of your wedding announcement with a red "x" through it. The text of the email is: "How could you do that?" It still doesn't rise to the level of a direct threat. But, it changes the tone of the situation. Before, it was possible that this was still just an enthusiastic fan, now at best case it's a disgruntled fan. We call it escalation. We are treating this as a stalker situation."

"So what do we do now?" I had just convinced myself not to worry about the emails, but this new one definitely has me worried. A red "x" is not a good sign. I'm trying very hard not to let my brain remind me that for a very long time I denied how I felt about her in order to keep her safe.

"We anticipate some sort of response to the fact that she didn't wear a red dress to the balls. The type of response might tell us whether this person attended one of the balls in person or whether he or she is getting all the information from media. We are still working on a suspect list."

"Including Todd?" It actually seems less likely to be him now that our Wedding Announcement is involved. That means there is no confusion between Donna and Ainsley. That should make Sam happy.

"Yes, of course, but we are not jumping to conclusions. What I'd like to do now is send a team over to your apartment to determine what security measures we need to take there. Then I'd like you and Donna to come back and meet with me again to go over the Security Detail and whatever new information we have. Okay? How about 2 o'clock?"

"Okay. Thanks, Ron."

I was planning to go get the newspapers from the West Wing, but instead I head straight for the stairs. I just want to be with Donna. I really hope she's still in bed so that I can just slip in beside her and hold her in my arms for a while.


	2. Chapter 2

I feel the bed sag and open my eyes just a little to find Josh trying to sneak back into bed.

"What time it is?" I mutter as I roll onto my stomach. I don't really care, I just want a few hours more sleep.  
"C'mere" he puts his hand on my hip and rolls me back to my side then molds himself behind me with his arm firmly around my waist. I feel a soft kiss on the back of my head, but he's not trying to start something and I feel myself drift back into sleep.

My eyes start to flutter as I feel a persistent bouncing but I try to keep them closed.  
"What the hell?" I groan.

"Tia Donna said a swear!" I hear Miranda's voice and my eyes fly open.  
She and Josh are sitting on the bed bouncing and grinning at me.

"Good morning, sleepyhead!" Josh sings at me. How on earth did I fall in love with a morning person?  
"What time is it?" I fall dramatically back on the pillow and stare up at the ceiling. Miranda giggles at me.  
"I told you she was funny in the morning." Josh whispers to her. I prop myself up on one elbow and give him the evil eye. Miranda giggles some more as she leaves the room.

"It's after 10." Josh says evenly. I recognize that voice. It's the no-nonsense, it's time to get up and face the day voice. He doesn't usually use it on me on Sundays.  
"But it's Sunday." I whine.  
"Yes it is, which is why you are still in bed at 10 o'clock." He leans over and kisses my forehead. Then he looks into my eyes and says "Get up and go brush your teeth. There is coffee in the sitting room and a little girl that really wants to spend some time with you." My stomach does a little flip. The no-nonsense voice really turns me on. But a quick glance around the room reminds me that we are guests of the President, and his little girl is right next door. That turns me off pretty fast.  
"Yes, dear." I say as I pull the covers off. His eyebrows shoot up. Did he forget we slept naked last night? I smile brightly at him. Serves him right.  
"Too bad there is a little girl in the sitting room." I say as I walk toward the bathroom. I smirk to myself as I hear him groan behind me.

I know Miranda is waiting so I move as quickly as I can, but I really want a shower. I even debate whether or not to blow dry my hair, but this isn't just a Sunday at home. Even if they treat us as family, we are still at the White House, it's still our place of employment, and people will be seeing us. So I will do my hair and put on nice jeans, boots, and a nice sweater. That's as casual as I'm going to be.

When I join Josh and Miranda in the sitting room, they both give me big grins. They are playing Mouse Trap and Miranda is looking at Josh like he hung the moon.  
"Where is everyone else?" I ask, settling into a chair to watch them.  
"Mommy and Daddy are sleeping and Peter is reading." Miranda responds.  
"They're still sleeping?" I have to admit I'm a little jealous. But then Josh gives me a look over Miranda's head and raises his eyebrows. OH! I get it.  
"I found Matt and Miranda in the kitchen having breakfast about an hour ago. He said he could really use a nap. So Miranda and I have been playing games while we wait for all you sleepyheads."

Speaking of breakfast, my stomach gives a growl.  
"Well I'm up now, so finish up that game. Should I go see if Peter wants to play Yahtzee with us?"

"Sure!" Miranda says as she moves her mouse 4 spaces. I take my cup of coffee and go across the hall and knock on Peter's door.

"Come in."  
"Hey, Peter, would you like to play Yahtzee with Josh and Miranda and me?"  
He smiles shyly and nods.

"Okay. I'm going to see if I can find a bagel or something, then I'll meet you in the Lincoln sitting room. Do you want anything?"  
"No, thank you." He's such a polite little boy.

In the kitchen I find a platter of breakfast pastries. You really can't get any more convenient. I know we will probably have lunch in a couple hours but I need something now. A small cheese Danish should do the trick.

We are just finishing our game of Yahtzee when Matt and Helen join us. They look relaxed and very happy. I know they'll have a Nanny for when we are not herebut it still feels nice to be watching their kids for a few hours. It's good practice for us. Not that I'm planning on a baby anytime soon. Josh and I agreed to just leave it up to nature, but I've heard that it can take a while. Especially at our ages. If it ends up taking a year that's okay with me.

During lunch, Helen and I go over the Sunday papers. The New York Times front page has a photo above the fold: Matt taking the oath, while Helen holds the Bible. Below the fold is a shot of the crowd. The Washington Post has a wider angle lens of the oath, Josh and I are in the background with other dignitaries. There is also a special section "All About the Inauguration" which covers all the events in quite a bit of detail. I'm happy to see our group photos and a nice write up of our initiative. We'll go over that tomorrow at our staff meeting.

Each individual ball has it's own article and accompanying photos. Josh and I are in quite a few of them. On the back page of the section, there are great close ups of Matt & Helen and Josh & me dancing. The headline is "Meet Washington's Newest Power Couples." The article goes over our histories, how we met and what we currently do, giving equal space to Josh & me as it does Matt & Helen. The article is generally complimentary. It lauds Josh as Washington's Wunderkind, suggesting that he's the next "king-maker" in the Democratic party. It also mentions that I am his former assistant and opines that if I had joined the Santos-McGarry Campaign from the start there wouldn't have been need for a brokered convention. I think that gives me far too much credit. And it kind of makes my blood run cold. It reminds me a little too much of the article about Josh that seemed to kick off a really bad time for him professionally. Helen doesn't know anything about that, though, and she thinks the article is great. The worst line keeps standing out to me- "Mr. & Mrs. Lyman denied the existence of a romantic relationship for years, but married very quickly after the election. No word on their plans for future children." It's little more than veiled speculation that we "had" to get married. But I guess it could be worse. I should probably just be glad that over-all the article is positive and it doesn't directly suggest that Josh and I were sleeping with each other all along.

"This is such a great picture of you two!" Helen grins at me. It is. We are dancing way too close. I'm resting my head on Josh's shoulder and he's resting his head on top of mine. We are both smiling contently. There is no doubt we are in love. Our mothers will love it. At least there's that.

After lunch, Miranda and Peter are really excited to watch Night at the Museum in the White House theater. It's fun to watch them experience this for the first time. I try to remember what the first time was like, but I can't quite capture the feeling. The truth is, it never got old. Every time I got to sit next to Josh and share popcorn in this theater was special to me. It was the close thing to a date with him and it was way better than any of the real dates I had during that time.

Unfortunately, we need to leave for our meeting with Ron before the movie is over.  
"Don't laugh at me. . . " Josh says as we leave the theater, "but I really kind of want to know how it ends."

"So," Josh starts hesitantly, as we get to the stairs, "I had a meeting with Ron earlier, while you were still asleep."  
I'm not sure how I feel about that. It sort of feels like he went behind my back, but on the other hand he's telling me about it, so it doesn't seem like he was trying to hide anything. I guess I need more information.  
"Why?"  
"Yesterday, when we were talking to him, Ron said something about Rosslyn and I had some questions."  
"Oh."  
"It's not that I don't want to talk to you about it, but it's sort of a hard topic for us and I wanted his perspective, and I wanted you to get some extra sleep."  
"Will you tell me what he said?"  
"Yes, if you want me to. Do you want me to?"  
I have to think about it. I don't want him to think that he has to tell me about every conversation that he has when I'm not around, but I want to know that he would if I asked.  
"You don't need to but you can if you want. Remember, we have the hard conversations now, we don't avoid them anymore."

Josh gives me a sad little smile. I understand. Hard conversations are still hard to have even if you are committed to having them.  
"Basically, he just told me how much the agents admire you and how amazing you are." I feel myself blushing.  
"I didn't really do anything."  
"You gave me a reason to live."

He says it with complete sincerity. He's hinted about this before but he's never said it quite so bluntly. I can't stop the tears that spring to my eyes. It was the absolute worst 6 months of my life but it was worth it. He didn't know how much I loved him and he didn't know how he loved me, but I was the reason to live. The concept is stunning.


	3. Chapter 3

We stand in the basement for a few minutes just holding each other. It's a good thing it's a quiet Sunday. Our agents are standing down the hall at a discrete distance and there is no one else around. Finally, I pull back and let her go. I still have something else I have to tell her.

"Ron did give me an update about your case." She's looking at me like she's just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I hate that I have to give her bad news, but I'd rather it come from me than Ron.  
"There was another email before the Inauguration. One you didn't see because it went to Spam."  
"What did it say?"  
"It was a copy of our Wedding Announcement. It had a red "X" through it. And the message said _why did you do that?_ "

She goes ashen. Her eyes get really wide, then a flood of words come pouring out of her mouth. This is total stream of consciousness. No filter.  
"I thought we had made it. I thought that because we waited so long there wouldn't be any fall out from our marriage. No scandal. No gossip. No harm to an administration. Haven't we sacrificed enough? Don't we have the scars to prove it?"

Her words hit me in the gut like a physical blow. Being with me has hurt her in spite of all our efforts. What if it gets worse than it already is? She's shaking. I can't tell if it's from fear or anger. I pull her into me and wrap my arms around her again. I hope she wants my comfort because I need to hold her.

"It's going to be fine. I'll keep you safe, the secret service will protect us." I just hold her for a few minutes, whispering to her and stroking her head. Eventually the shaking stops.  
"Are you okay?" It's sort of a stupid question, but I'm just trying to get her to talk to me again.  
"I don't even know how to feel! I'm angry. I'm sad. I'm scared. I'm numb."

"Oh, Baby. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." I'm trying to comfort her but I don't really know what to say. She's right. This isn't fair.  
"We have nothing to be sorry for." She says fiercely, maybe it is more anger than fear driving her emotions right now. "I'll never be sorry for loving you." That is one of the best things she could say to me right now, because a lot of this feels like it's my fault. I hope she doesn't think that I'm sorry we got married. That's not what I meant.  
"I didn't mean I was sorry for loving you, or sorry for marrying you. I just meant I was sorry that we are going through this. I wish I could make it stop."

Seeing her reaction to this threat makes me less sure about my decision not to tell her about the other threat years ago. I didn't want to expose her to any more of the ugliness of the world than was absolutely necessary and I didn't want her to be afraid. Right now she doesn't seem afraid, just angry. But that threat was different than this. That was a pretty blatant threat and gun violence is a very sensitive subject with us. I did what I thought was best at the time. I hope she understands. Unfortunately, I have to tell her now or Ron will. Maybe I should wait until we are with him? I'm a little worried about her reaction. She's so much stronger than I ever gave her creditor for, and she really values her independence, and she just reminded me that she doesn't like to be kept in the dark. She might be really mad that I didn't tell her before. If we are in the room with Ron when I tell her, she might not yell at me even if she is angry. On the other hand, I don't really want her to hold back just because we are in front of someone. If she's really angry at me, I want to know. We have the hard conversations now. Right. I take a deep breath and dive in.

"I have something else to tell you. You might be mad at me. If you are I want you to be honest about it and we'll deal with it, Okay?"  
"Okay." She says hesitantly and I see her brace herself. My heart breaks a little. I used to see her do this all the time, brace herself for words that she expected to hurt. God. I thought we were past this.

"About 3 years ago the Secret Service intercepted a letter threatening you." I didn't realize it was possible but she goes even more pale. I wish we were sitting down. I take both her arms in case she faints. I want to hug her, but I want to see her face while I tell her about this.

"They determined that it wasn't a credible threat because the person was already incarcerated. Ron left it up to me whether to tell you about it."  
"Why didn't you tell me?" She whispers.  
"I didn't want you to live in fear. You were still innocent. This business- it makes people jaded- and you held on to so much of your innocence for so long- I just didn't want to take that way. Ron really was convinced that there was nothing to the threat, so I just figured you were better off not knowing. I'm sorry. I probably should have told you. I didn't really give you enough credit for how strong you are. I really did just want to protect you from the ugliness of the world."

She just stares at me. I can't tell how she's feeling.  
"Donna?" I prompt her for some sort of response, but she still doesn't say anything. So I try again.  
"I love you." I tell her, placing a gentle kiss on her lips. She doesn't pull back so I wrap my arms around her and just hold on. She's shaking again and holding on to me pretty tightly. I don't know if she's mad at me or not but at least she is still letting me hold her.

After a few more seconds, I say "We better go to our meeting with Ron." I want to know what she's thinking but if she isn't talking to me, it's okay. I deserve it. But we really should have this meeting.

"Okay." She says and steps back. When she looks up there are tears in her eyes. I feel a clenching in my chest. It literally hurts to see her cry. But then she says-  
"I love you, Josh. Even when I don't love a choice you make. And this is part of the past. We agreed- clean slate for the things that happened in the past."  
"But are you mad?" I probably should have just accepted her acceptance but I really need to know.  
She stops and thinks about it, examining her feelings.  
"No. I'm not, but to be honest, I'm sort of feeling numb right now. You just kind of hit me with three things."

I flinch at her choice of the word "hit"- right there tells me something about how she's feeling. I don't ever want her to feel like I hit her with anything.

"I'm not mad right now. And I'm choosing not to be mad at you later. I'm not sure how I feel about you not telling me about the threat before- it's sort of nice that you were trying to protect me, so I'm just going to focus on that. But from now on we need to be partners. I'm an adult. I need to be part of the decision making process, okay?"

"Okay." I can't believe how quickly she's able to process things. It's truly amazing.  
"That means that if you want to meet with Ron privately about something that concerns me, I'd like to have a heads up next time, okay?"  
"Okay." So maybe it would have still been okay for me to meet with him without her if I had asked. That's good to know.  
"We don't keep things from each other anymore- well unless it's a matter of security clearance." She stands a little taller and smiles at me.  
"Okay." She's not the same girl that walked into my office almost a decade ago. She really is a strong, mature woman. I'm probably going to always have the instinct to want to keep every negative thing away from her, but I'm going to have to trust in her abilities to handle life's hardships. And I already know that life is better when she's my partner. I give her a kiss, and repeat my promise. "Okay."  
"Okay, then. We'd better go to this meeting." She looks determined now.

The Donna that can do anything is back. I should have told her about the threat when it happened because she could have handled it. I underestimated her. Even now, I underestimated her capacity for love and forgiveness. I am a very lucky man to have Donnatella Moss Lyman as my wife.


	4. Chapter 4

"Josh, Donna, thanks for coming." Ron's politeness is kind of funny. Like we are doing him a favor stopping by. But his calmness always makes me feel better.  
"Hey Ron." I greet him with a smile. None of this is his fault.  
"Hey Ron." Josh echoes me. That makes me smile too. It's something that I've noticed that he does sometimes. It's totally subconscious. It's kind of cute. The normalness of the whole exchange makes me feel a little better.

"Let's start by talking about your detail. Then we can review where we are in the investigation. Alright?"  
"Kay" Josh says easily, while I just nod.

"Alright- Due to the current conflict in Kazakhstan, the detail for the President's Chief of Staff would be two agents while you are in the White House. When you leave you'll have a town car, with two agents in front. An SUV with 4 agents will follow."

"Six agents just for me?" Josh asks in confusion.  
"Two of the agents drive the vehicles. They remain in the vehicles with the motors running. Two agents stay with you. Two agents stay standing outside of the vehicles monitoring the building and area. Of course your total detail is much larger than 6 because they work in shifts."

I'm watching Josh's face while Ron is talking. He doesn't look thrilled but he's nodding. When Ron is finished Josh just says "Okay." Then Ron turns and looks at me.

"Generally the First Lady's Chief of Staff does not have a security detail except when traveling with the First Lady, unless there are extenuating circumstances. In your case, the fact that you are married to the Chief of Staff is, in and of itself, an extenuating circumstance. I would be recommending a detail for you even if we were not in a conflict or dealing with this stalker situation. I just want you to know that. When you are together, I feel comfortable simply adding another agent to the detail. If there are times when you will not be traveling together, please give us advance notice so we can add a second town car and agent."

Josh looks a little disturbed. "So if she wasn't married to me she wouldn't need protection?"  
He's going to find a way to blame himself for this. I just know it. I reach over and take his hand and give it a squeeze. Being married to him is worth it.

"Even if she wasn't married to you, I would recommend a detail for Donna. Besides your marriage, there are two additional extenuating circumstances. One is the terrorist attack in Gaza, the other is this stalker situation. Either of those would be a reason to recommend a protective detail for her."  
Thank you Ron! I'm not happy that we have all these reasons to need protection, but at least Josh can't blame himself.

"The Security Team has completed it's review of your apartment. They have added a security system and replaced the windows with bullet proof glass. They also changed all the locks." He places a set of keys on the desk. I've been going along pretty good until now but I feel tears prick my eyes. The key that has been on my key ring for 6 years no longer opens Josh's apartment.

"What's the matter?" Josh asks. Then he let's out a little laugh. "I guess that's a stupid question."  
Actually that makes me giggle a little. I guess I was being stupid too. It really doesn't matter if the old key works. I get to live with Josh. I don't need the old key. Well, I don't need it but you'd better believe it's going into my keepsake box.

"Nothing." I finally answer Josh. He raises an eyebrow at me.  
"Okay, well, I'm not thrilled with the idea of having a security detail but I have no specific objections to anything Ron just explained. Helen said that you can hardly tell the difference between real glass and bullet proof glass." Okay the last part came out more sarcastically than I intended, but I think I'm entitled.  
Josh leans over and kisses me softly. "I love you." He's right that's all that matters. Ron is smiling indulgently at us, but he's still got things to go over.

"So, Donna, Josh told you about the email of your Wedding Announcement?"  
"Yes."  
"Based on the emails that you received prior to the Inauguration, we are treating this as a stalker situation. The emails all originate from public libraries. On Monday, we will contact the libraries to see if there are records of use or video surveillance. Obviously, we'd like to find out who is sending these before it escalates further. So far there has not been a threat. Technically, no crime has been committed. We will continue to monitor your old email address as well as your new address. We will have agents screen all incoming mail addressed to either of you both at home and work."

Well I can't say I'm thrilled to have my mail and email being monitored. But I guess it's part of the price we pay for the privilege of serving our country. I wonder when I'll finally feel like the price is too high and it's time to be done? I wonder when Josh will feel that way. Please God, just let us get there together before anything worse happens to us.

"So far, there has not been any further contact since the balls. We do expect some sort of response."  
"Now do either of you have any questions?"  
"Why do you say a response? I haven't contacted him. I don't even know who it is."

"Donna, while we are not ruling anything out, you are probably being targeted because you are 'famous.' The stalker most likely saw you on TV as a spokesperson during the campaigns and fixated on you. When the only email was about a red dress we really didn't have enough information to even try to profile if the stalker was male or female, but given the Wedding Announcement email, it's more likely than not a male who see you as some sort of soulmate and now feels rejected by you. In these types of cases, a stalker sees everything in the media as directed towards him. So he 'responds' to what he sees in the media. There were a lot of pictures of the two of you in the paper this morning. We expect a response."

"What do you mean you haven't ruled anything out?" Josh asks.  
"Well it's still possible that this is a casual acquaintance or former boyfriend. It just doesn't seem as likely. But we are still following all those leads until we determine who is sending these emails. Once we know who it is we'll be able to take our next steps."  
"Which are?" Josh prompts.  
"Well, it does depend on what we discover. But if the emails are still as bland as they have been so far, the next step is to send a cease and desist letter, informing the sender that Donna does not want any further contact. If there is future contact, even benign contact, we can utilize the stalker laws. Obviously, if future contact involves any actual threats, we take a different course of action."

"Any other questions?"

Josh is still trying to put it all together. "So Ron, if I understand this correctly, the level of security and type of detail that we have is what you would have recommended even if we had not received these emails. Is that right?"

"Yes. This is the heightened level of security that I would recommend based on the fact that the US is in a conflict, along with your histories, and the fact that you are married to each other. We haven't actually added any agents due to the stalker."

That's a relief. In fact, if it's not a big deal maybe we don't _really_ need all this security. Without the stalker problem, we are back to what Josh and I talked about last week, when we decided we didn't need a detail. I feel myself starting to smile.  
"So this stalker thing is no big deal?"  
Ron and Josh look at me like I'm nuts.

"We don't know how big of a deal this is yet, Donna." Ron says kindly. "If we were not in a conflict right now, and there was no stalker then I might have recommended a smaller detail for Josh, and I might not have recommended the bullet proof glass in your apartment. But the detail and security measures we are taking are what I believe is necessary and appropriate under all the circumstances. I just want you to know that when the stalker issue is resolved, if we are still in a conflict in Kazakhstan, then I probably won't recommend reducing your combined detail."

"But if we weren't in a conflict in Kazakhstan, and I didn't have a stalker, then we could forgo all this?" That came out a little bitchier than I intended.  
"I'm sorry, Ron. I don't mean to sound ungrateful. You know how much I appreciate you and your guys and all you do. Thank you for watching out for us."

"You're welcome Donna. It's our job to keep you safe. For as long as you hold these jobs, the minimum detail that I will recommend is that the two of you each have an agent and that you use a car and driver. We'll try to help you maintain as much of a normal life as possible. But you know that's not really what you signed up for."

"I know." I appreciate Ron's reminder. We did sign up for this. Last week, we might have thought we could get away without a detail but we were not being realistic. We interact with the First Family. We need to take our protection seriously for our sake as well as for theirs.

"So any other questions?" Ron has the patience of a saint! He's going to keep asking that until we don't.  
"When do we meet the agents?" Josh has moved back into practicalities.  
"Noon tomorrow. At that meeting I'll go over the rotations and introduce you to the teams. When do you anticipate heading home today?"  
Josh looks at me for an answer. Soon, I want to go home as soon as possible. But we need to go back to the Residence and check in with the President and Mrs. Santos, and say goodbye to the children.

"4 O'clock?" I offer. That gives us about an hour. Josh smiles and looks back at Ron.  
"Okay. Come back here at 4 and I'll introduce your detail for this evening. They'll be part of your team and you can meet the rest tomorrow."

"Any other questions?" I'm amazed that Ron still doesn't look exasperated with us.  
"No." I say quietly.  
"Not right now." Josh answers.

Then we stand up and shake Ron's hand. I guess our new normal is about to begin.


	5. Chapter 5

I take Donna's hand as we leave Ron's office. As we walk quietly toward the Residence, I realize I need to say something to her. I stop and turn to look at her.

"Ron made some good points in there. We aren't oblivious to the fact that these jobs come with risk, and using the protection offered may be inconvenient at times but it minimizes the risk. We owe it to each other and the First Family to use the detail. It _is_ what we signed up for. But if you ever decide it's not worth it anymore, just say the word. I don't want to do this for one minute longer than you do. Remember what I said yesterday. I'll _always_ choose you."

Donna smiles at me before leaning in for a kiss. "I'm okay. This stalker thing is a little freaky, but it's not that big of a deal. We've been on the edge of all this protection for a long time. We'll learn how to live with it more directly for a while. I'm really excited about this job and what we can do for this country. I'm no where near ready to give up."

That's my girl. I'm not convinced that the stalker isn't a big deal, but I like her fighting spirit.

Once we are back to the Residence, we quickly pack our things, then we fill Matt and Helen in on our status. Helen wrinkles her nose when Donna tells her about the bullet proof glass in our apartment, but it seems like they have bonded even more over it. Matt is glad that we have accepted the maximum level of security available under the circumstances.

"We just need to resolve this Kazahkstan thing and deal with this stalker then, don't we?! Guess we'd better get to work first thing tomorrow."

"Yes, sir." I respond.  
I do want both of those things resolved, but the truth is, I think I'm going to want to keep the maximum protective detail anyway. I find myself liking the idea more and more.

"I'll have Senior Staff in my office at 7:30. Will you be in the Oval at 8?" I notice Helen's head pop up, but she doesn't say anything.

"Let's plan for 8:30. Tomorrow is the kids first day of school. They need to be there at 7:45. I should be able to be make here by 8:30."

I see Helen smile, apparently relieved that she didn't need to remind him. I smile at her. This is one of the things that we need to work out. Barring any emergency situtation, the schedule is his to set, it just helps if we all talk to each other about it. By the end of this week, hopefully we'll all have a sense of what we want the schedule to look like on a "normal" day.

"Tia Donna! Tio Josh!" Miranda comes running into the living room, "want to see what I am wearing to school tomorrow?"  
Donna looks over to Helen, who smiles indulgently at Miranda and nods to Donna. I'm sure that she's glad that Miranda is excited about starting school and that she has someone to share it with. I wonder how Peter is feeling about starting a new school.

Donna and I stand up and follow Miranda out of the living room to her room. Donna oohs and ahhs over the outfit Miranda has picked. When they look at me, I tell her it's very nice. What do I know about little girls clothing? Then Miranda realizes that I haven't seen her room before. She gives me the VIP tour, showing me her dollhouse, tea set, and vanity. It's a very sweet room. The thought catches me off-guard and I smile to myself. A few years ago, I wouldn't have thought twice about something like this. Now, I'm looking forward to having a little girl of my own someday and imagining a frilly pink room in my house.

When we are done in Miranda's room, it's time for Donna and I to head back downstairs.  
"Should we say goodbye to Peter?" I ask Matt.  
"Yes, please. I think he's in his room worrying about tomorrow."  
Donna and I knock on the door.  
Peter answers it and he does look nervous. Maybe I can help with that.

"Hey, Man. Tia Donna & I have to get home now. Tomorrow's a big day. I'm a little nervous about my new job, but I know it's going to be okay."  
"Really? You're nervous?"  
"Yes. Any time I have to do something new, I get a little nervous." I drop my voice to a whisper, "sometimes I even feel sick to my stomach. I make sure I eat something healthy and get a good night's sleep. I try to stay relaxed but if I start to worry I just remind myself that I have a lot of people that love me and that if I need help all I have to do is ask."  
"Okay." Peter still looks a little uncertain.  
"Can I have a hug goodbye?" Donna asks him, and he brightens up. Somebody might have a little crush. I know the feeling.  
"Sure!"  
"I'll stop by tomorrow after work and we can compare first day stories, okay?" I give him a little fist bump.  
"Okay."

"Thanks, Josh." Matt says as we walk toward the stairs.  
"It's what Uncles are for, right?"  
"Yes, exactly." He claps my shoulder. My relationship with Matt is going to be different than what Leo and President Bartlet had, but it's okay. We'll figure it out.

Helen and Donna are hugging. I hear her tell Donna "Thanks for everything, this is going to be an adventure. Oh, and an Usher will take your things out to your car." Helen giggles a bit after the last part, like it's still dawning on her what this is going to be like.

Donna and I head back down the stairs to the basement. After all these stairs, I don't feel bad at all about skipping the treadmill today! At four o'clock on the dot, we find ourselves back in Ron's office. You know I really like Ron, but I'm getting kind of sick of visiting him. Donna doesn't look thrilled either. I think we might need to "find the funny."

"You know Ron, we really should stop meeting like this."  
Ron just rolls his eyes and hands us our panic buttons.  
"I hope you never need to use them. But if you feel like you are in a dangerous situtation, press it and it will send a signal with your location and we will send back up immediately."

"So like when Donna asks me if a dress makes her look fat, I should press the button?" I ask Ron while grinning at Donna. She immediately picks up the banter. She's not going to be out done.

"So like when Josh's snoring is so loud I feel like I'm going to die from exhaustion?"

"How about when the automatic coffee maker doesn't start on time?" I shoot back. She usually programs it the night before, it's only not started once, but to be fair it was probably my fault for distracting her.

"Or someone forgets to put a new roll of toilet paper on?" She smirks at me. Okay, that's happened more than once and was definitely my fault.

Donna and I are giggling like children and Ron gives us an exasperated look.  
"If you're ready to meet your detail, they're in the next room."

"What if I forget to buy her an anniversary present?" I ask Ron as he is opening the door to the conference room.  
He stops and looks at me intently.  
"By all means, press the button." He says then he turns to Donna, "and we'll come help you take care of the body."

The three of us are laughing as we go in to meet the agents.

Once Donna and I are finally in the back of a town car heading home, I look over at her and grin.  
"You know, this really isn't so bad."  
Donna grins back at me. "No, I guess not."  
I lean over and give her a kiss.  
Ten minutes later we are pulling up in front of the brownstone. There is now a large "no parking/tow away zone" directly in front of the entrance.  
"I'll bet that's a hefty fine." Donna says with her eyes twinkling.  
" _So_ much trouble." I smirk at her and she giggles.

Scott lowers the window between the front and back.  
"Okay Mr. & Mrs. Lyman. We're going to wait here a few minutes while an agent sweeps the apartment. We will let you know when we are ready for you to go in. Mr. Lyman, when you exit we'd like you to slide across the seat and exit from the door closest to the building please."

As he's giving his instructions to us two agents get out of the SUV. One of them goes into the building while Jackie, Donna's agent, takes a position just outside of Donna's door. Scott gets out and comes and stands beside my door. A few minutes later, Donna's door opens. Another agent, I think that's Phil, is holding the front door open. Jackie takes lead with Donna and I right behind her. Scott flanks us. As soon as we are through the front door, Phil closes it and joins the formation. As we arrive at the front door the agent guarding it opens the door and we follow Jackie into the apartment. Scott follows us, while two agents remain outside.

"Not bad for the first time Mr. & Mrs. Lyman." Scott says seriously. Donna gives me a high five. Scott and Jackie break into smiles. It's nice to know they do have emotions.

"Maybe we should start timing ourselves. Do you know what the record is?" Donna asks Scott. He looks confused for a minute. Well, I guess they still take everything seriously.  
"She's just kidding." I tell him.  
"Okay. Do you have plans for this evening?" Scott asks.  
"No, I think we are in for the night."  
"Hold on," Donna says "Let me make sure I have something to make for dinner." She heads to the kitchen to check.

"If you are not sure, we'll keep the town car here, in case you'd like to go somewhere. But once you are in for the night we'll take it to the garage. The SUV and four agents will remain. What time would you like the town car to pick you up in the morning?"  
"7:00 please."  
"We have food!" Donna announces when she comes back from the kitchen.  
"Alright then, Sir, Ma'am, We'll be just outside the door."

Scott and Jackie leave the apartment. I hear one of them say "Bulldog and Backpack secure" as the door shuts.  
"Ma'am." Donna whines. "Now I know what Helen is talking about!"


	6. Chapter 6

Once the door is closed Josh turns to me and takes me in his arms.  
"Hey, how're you feeling?"  
I smile at him, "well it's been a day. But it's not quite 5. We've got a whole evening ahead of us. I'd really like to reclaim our lazy Sunday. What do you say we change into comfy clothes, make something for dinner and then watch TV... or _something_."

Josh grins at me then walks over to the door and puts his back against it. What's he doing? He starts walking towards our bedroom, counting each step. When he gets to the bedroom door he says,  
"I think we're good. Even with all the noise you like to make. But maybe we should start sleeping with the door shut, just to be sure."  
I just roll my eyes at him. I didn't really need the reminder that we now have company, all. the. time. But I appreciate that he's trying to add some humor to the situation.

I come up behind him and wrap my arms around his waist. "what would you like for dinner?"  
"You?"  
"Maybe for dessert, if you eat all your vegetables."  
"What are my choices?"  
"Breakfast for dinner or Spaghetti."  
"Not a whole lot of vegetables in pancakes, whereas Spaghetti Sauce is made from tomatoes, so I think I'll choose that."  
"Well, a tomato is actually a fruit. But we'll count it. This time."  
He turns and kisses me gently.  
"Thank you very much, Ma'am."  
I smack him playfully on the arm. Come on. Let's get changed and make something to eat.

Josh settles himself on the bed to watch me change. It's one of his favorite pastimes and I don't mind giving him a show. In fact, I chose to pack this underwear specifically for him to discover at some point, so now is as good as any. I sit down on the end of the bed and remove my boots. Then I walk over to the closet and put them away. With my back still to Josh, I shimmy out of my jeans. As my panties are revealed, I hear him groan.

"Are those new?"  
"Yeah. Do you like them? I ask shaking my hips a little.  
"Very much so."  
I turn and grin at him. These jeans are still good for another wear, so I fold them up and stick them in a drawer as I grab a pair of pajama bottoms. As I'm putting the bottoms on I ask Josh-  
"What kind do you like best?" He looks confused.  
"Underwear. What kind do you like best?"  
"Boxers."  
"Not for you, silly. For me. What kind of underwear do you like me to wear?"  
"Can I see those again?" I laugh at him. Nice try.  
"For research purposes!" He's trying to look serious. I walk over to his side of the bed but stop just out of reach. Then I very slowly and deliberately take the bottoms off again and stand there.  
"Take your top off too." He's using the no-nonsense voice and it's really turning me on. I slowly peel my sweater off, revealing a matching baby blue demi-cup.  
"I really like matching sets. Now, turn around." If he keeps using that voice these panties are going to be really wet in a minute. I turn slowly so that my back is to him. He doesn't say anything but a few seconds later he leans forward and traces the line of the underwear and then the under curve of my bottom.  
"I don't know the name of these. What are they called?"  
"Cheeky. Because . . . "  
"Yeah, I get it. I like these. A lot."  
"Better than a thong?"  
"Yes. The thong ones don't look very comfortable. Although, I do like seeing your ass. But these ones are sexy in a teasing sort of way. Just a little hint of what's about to be revealed."  
He plants a very light kiss on the exposed part of each cheek.

"You still have to eat your vegetables." I remind both of us.  
"Okay. I can be patient. You are worth the wait."  
I take a step forward and pull a hoodie out of his bottom drawer.  
"I think you've gotten more use out of those hoodies than I have."  
"What's yours is mine."  
"You claimed them years ago. If it weren't for you, I'd probably have gotten rid of them by now."  
I pull the PJ bottoms back on and he smiles at me.  
"You know, I'd even eat peas for the privilege of unwrapping you."  
"A salad will do. Do you want to get comfortable too?"

"Why? Do you want to check out my boxers?"  
"I wouldn't mind."  
I walk around to my side of the bed and settle in, giving him a shove to get moving. He gets up and pulls a pair of sweats out of his drawer and grabs long sleeve t-shirt. He takes his sweater off and then slowly unbuttons his shirt. He slips it off and then whirls it over his head while shaking his hips. I giggle at him. He's a terrible striptease. He rolls his eyes at me then wads the shirt up and lobs it toward the hamper. We both cheer when it goes in. He doesn't try to tease me while taking of his jeans. He just yanks them down and steps out of them. He's standing there in striped boxers without a shirt, looking somewhat self-conscious. He clears his throat a little.

"Like what you see?"  
I get up on my knees and crawl over to the end of the bed. I run my hands over his broad shoulders and down his muscular arms. Then I run one hand up the middle of his chest, tracing his scars. I grab his ass with my other hand.  
"Very much so."  
I lean in and give him a long kiss then ask him-  
"Are you hungry?"  
"Not really."  
"Do you promise to eat your vegetables later?"  
"Yes."  
"Okay, then. Maybe a little cardio? You know . . . to work up an appetite?"  
He grins and pushes me back on the bed.  
"You're over-dressed."

Later, I'm laying happily in his arms when my stomach growls. He smiles at me and runs his hand over it.  
"Your stomach growls a lot."  
"I know. It's so embarrassing."  
"I find it endearing. Whenever I hear it, I just want to take care of you."  
"I really like it when you do."

He pauses for a minute, like he's considering whether or not to ask me something.  
"Did you skip meals when you worked for me?"  
I pause, considering whether or not to answer. I don't really want our happy moment to be ruined. And this topic has the potential to do that. Finally I decide for vagueness.  
"Sometimes."  
"Why?"  
"Living in DC is very expensive. Sometimes you just have to hope that someone brought bagels to the office."  
"I would have feed you."  
"You often did."  
"But not always? Not enough?"  
I just shrug. I don't want to talk about specifics. I only felt neglected when Amy was around. My stomach growls again. This time it seems like good timing because he drops the conversation.  
"Well, I want to take care of you now."  
We get up and put our sweats back on and head into the kitchen.

I grab the spaghetti pot and fill it with water and set it on the stove to start boiling. For a guy that didn't cook much, he has really nice pots and pans.  
"Get the meatballs out of the freezer." I tell Josh while I get a box of spaghetti and a jar of sauce out of the cupboard. As he hands me the meatballs, I grab his face and look deep into his eyes-  
"You must never tell my Mother that we use boxed spaghetti, frozen meatballs and store-bought sauce, understand?"  
"Yes, dear." He quickly agrees. He's scared of my Mother too.

While I'm opening the sauce and getting it into a pan, he opens the fridge and gets out the ingredients for a salad. As he starts slicing cucumbers, I give him a big smile. Bonus points for not just eating his veggies, but actually making the salad! I put the meatballs in the sauce and put it on low. Since they are precooked they just need to heat up by the time the noodles are done. I check the fridge and I'm happy to find we still have a tube of dinner rolls. I turn the oven on and put the rolls on a tray. By the time I'm done, Josh has the salad all ready.  
"Good job, babe." I praise him. He smiles a little sheepishly.  
"I really like this. Cooking, like this with you, it's relaxing."  
I wrap my arms around his waist and give him a kiss.

I love our lazy Sundays.


	7. Chapter 7

I set my alarm for 5:30 last night, but I was pretty sure I wouldn't need it. We went to bed at 10pm and fell asleep pretty quickly. Sure enough I woke up just after 5. I'm happy that I can turn the alarm off so that it doesn't disturb Donna. This is perfect. I can spend about a half hour on the treadmill, shower and still have time to go over my notes for Senior Staff.

I spend the 30 minutes on the treadmill thinking about whether Baker's confirmation is going to be a winable fight. The President is adamant that he wants Baker as VP. We really need this win to start the administration off on the right track. The Senate has already confirmed a few of our nominees for lower level positions. Those are gimmes though. It doesn't tell us anything about what the Senate will do with Baker. We specifically held off on some of the bigger nominations, including Vinick's until we could nominate Baker. We couldn't do that until after Inauguration. We want them to have multiple positions to confirm and we want Vinick to ease the skids. It has to be worth something that a Republican will be fourth in line to the Presidency.

In the shower, I think about Donna. That's what I do. I'd really like to have her in here with me, but we need to be on time this morning. The car is coming for us at 7 and I want to be ready to walk out the door. During the Transition we weren't under a tight schedule and we frequently arrived right at 7:30 or even later a few mornings. I want to be in the building by 7:15 if possible, which shouldn't be a problem if we are ready to go when the car gets here. I'm going to have to get her moving earlier. She knows this. She wrinkled her nose but she set the timer on the coffee machine for 5:45. Sure enough, I hear it go off as I'm drying off.

I walk back into the bedroom with a towel around my waist. If she gets up on the first try, she can see me naked as a reward. I lean down and plant a gentle kiss on her forehead. God. She's beautiful.  
"Baby, it's time to wake up." I give her a few more kisses and she opens her eyes. For a second I think we've done it. But she looks over at the clock and mumbles I don't need a whole hour to get ready. Then she rolls over and puts her head under a pillow. Okay. We're going to have to ease into it. No problem. I'll finish dressing and make the bagels.

Ten minutes later, I try again. I pull the pillow off her head.  
"Time to get up, Sweetheart." She rolls on her back and huffs adorably, then she opens her eyes and blinks at me several times.  
"I love you" I tell her as I leave to go pack up my backpack. I'm reading over some notes regarding extending the school day when it suddenly occurs to me that I haven't heard the shower running yet. Shit! I glance at my watch. It's 6:25.

I hustle back to the bedroom and find Donna back to sleep. She's stinkin' cute, but I'm kinda pissed.  
"DONNA!" I bellow. She sits straight up and her eyes fly open. I get right in her face and use my no-nonsense voice, except I really, really mean it. "Whatever it was that you did to get to work on time when you didn't have me around . . . . I need you to do that now. And get your ASS OUT OF BED!" She scrambles out of bed in the other direction and practically runs to the bathroom.

I feel a little bad for yelling at her, but it was time for some tough love. I don't want to be late to my own Senior Staff meeting on my first day. I don't want to call a second car for her. I'd really rather we ride together. And she agreed to this last night. I wouldn't mind making other plans if that's what she wanted but it needs to not be a last minute decision just because she doesn't want to get out of bed. But still, the look on her face as she was scrambling out of bed isn't how I want to start the day.

And then it hits me, I still haven't heard the shower yet. "I'm gonna kill her." I mutter under my breath as I stalk back to the bedroom. But when I get there she's dressed in a pantsuit with her hair twisted up and sticking out. I've seen this look before. It's really quite cute.

"Almost ready! Don't leave without me." Her tone is a little huffy. I roll my eyes. I don't want to fight about this, but this is totally her fault.  
"I'm not leaving you." I kiss the top of her head.

I look down at my watch. It's 6:50. She still needs shoes and her coat. And she hasn't had any breakfast yet. "Where are your shoes?" She walks over to the closet and pull out a pair and slips them on. I place my hand on the small of her back and guide her toward the kitchen.

Once she she's eaten half a bagel and had a few slips of coffee she seems in a better mood. Although I did notice her wrinkle her nose when she took the first swallow.  
"I'm sorry I didn't get up when you asked me to."  
"Well, you didn't get to see me naked. And your coffee is probably cold. So I think you've been punished enough." I walk into the living room and grab her coat then hold it out for her. She smiles at me at she slips her arms into it.

As we open the front door, she grins mischeviously at me, "I suppose I'd be pushing my luck if I asked to stop at Starbucks?" It's a good thing her tone is playful or I might be tempted to swat her backside.  
"You have an assistant now." I smirk at her. "Maybe you'll have better luck getting coffee than I did."  
She gives me a glare. "You had the greatest assistant ever."  
"Yes. But she wouldn't bring me coffee."  
"That's true." She agrees.

"What time is your staff meeting?" I have an idea.  
"Not until 8."  
"Why don't you drop me off and then have the car take you to Starbucks?"  
"Is that allowed?"  
"I don't see why not. Ron did say we could try to have as normal of a life as possible."  
She smiles at me and we forgive each other for being a little grouchy. But I think we need to talk about this tonight. I definitely don't want to do this every morning.

At 7:15 the car drops me and my two agents off at the portico. The agent in charge didn't look very happy at making a Starbucks run, but he couldn't resist Donna's pleading eyes. I'm curious to find out the logistics of how it worked later. I can't imagine a motorcade going through a drive-thru. I guess Donna and her agent will just go in while the motorcade sits out front. This maybe a topic we need to discuss with Ron. I have no idea what protocol is here. Of course, the whole thing could be avoided if Donna would just get out of bed on time. I find myself shaking my head again and wondering how it was possible that she ever beat me to the office before.

I make my way to Leo's office, squaring my shoulders as I walk through the door into Margaret's office. Of course she's already here. She may be quirky, but it's comforting seeing her at her desk. At least one of us knows what we're doing.  
"Good Morning, Margaret" I walk through the door into my office and stop short. Margaret runs into me.  
"Whoa. Gotta keep moving there, man." Margaret says scooting around me to sit in front of my desk. I walk around and drop my backpack on the floor by my chair then take my coat off. I toss it over the back of a chair in the sitting area then sit down.

"Alright. Then." Margaret says. "Let's get started." My mouth quirks up in a smile. I may run the Senior Staff meeting but it appears that Margaret runs the Chief of Staff meeting.  
"Here's the list of afternoon meetings. You know the drill. Circle the things you want more information on." I give it a quick look and circle a couple items. Margaret nods. I'm glad I have her approval.  
"Next, I'd like to get your lunch order."  
"I have a meeting with Donna and Ron at noon." Margaret quirks an eyebrow at me.  
"When did that get on your schedule?"  
"Um, yesterday. We are going to meet our full detail."  
"Okay, just remember, I'm in charge of the schedule. So, when are you going to eat lunch?"  
"With Donna, after the meeting. I'll be back here by 1."  
"Well, I guess that's okay, then." She gives me a nod. Then she stands up, picks up my coat, walks over to the closet, and hangs it up. As she leaves the room, she says "Senior staff in 5. Do you want some coffee?"  
"uh, sure."

With Margaret gone, I take a minute to look around the room. It's back to the blue color that I like. The building department sure is efficient. The furniture is the same as Leo's too. But my baseball is on my desk and my Jericho March Poster is hanging on the wall, so I'm already feeling a little more at home. I glance over to the bookshelf. Along with some of my books, there's my favorite wedding photo, a picture of our nieces and nephews around a giant snowman, the picture of me and my grandfather, and a picture of my parents.

And there in the middle is Gail the Goldfish, with a sticky note on her bowl.  
[J- Sometimes you're gonna feel like a fish out of water. Just keep swimming. Take care of Gail for me. Love, CJ]

Margaret comes back in with the coffee. And I point to Gail.  
"Did you know about that?"  
"Yes. She couldn't really take her on the plane."  
"Okay, you're in charge of feeding Gail too."  
"I'm in charge of feeding everything in this office." She gives me a look to see if I'm going to argue.  
"Says who?"  
"Donna."  
"Okay then." No argument here. I know when I'm outmatched. At least this time around I get coffee.


	8. Chapter 8

Running into Starbucks with a secret service agent is definitely a different experience. The baristas on 14th St must deal with it regularly because they seem to know what to do. One of them waives me over to the pick-up area to place my order. While the upside is faster service, the downside is the stares you get. And when people realize they have no idea who you are they aren't impressed by the secret service. They just seem annoyed that you got to skip the line. I definitely won't make a habit of this. I consider getting coffee for the whole staff, but after line jumping, placing a big order just doesn't feel right. Plus other than Annabeth, I don't know what anyone drinks and it would be cold by the 8am meeting anyway.

Once the town car drops me off at the portico, I feel ready to tackle the world. But still walking through the doors and swiping my badge, I get a sense of awe. I can't believe I get to do this.  
"Good morning, Larry."  
"Good morning, Donna." He grins at me as I head off to the East Wing.

When I get the First Lady's Office, I'm glad to find the door unlocked. I wasn't sure what the status would be. My assistant, Karen, is sitting at her desk. I'm happy to see that it has a computer and telephone. I take a quick glance around. Both desks have computers and phones and are located in better positions. They've also created a sitting area with some couches, arm chairs and end tables. There is still work to be done in here but at least it looks functional.

"Good morning, Donna." Karen greets me with a smile.  
"Good morning." I'm pleased to see her here before me. Being an assistant in the White House is actually a salaried job, but based on the pay some people assume its only 40 hours a week, when it's often much more. I appreciate an assistant who realizes it's a good idea to arrive at least 15 minutes before your boss. I hadn't told Karen when to get here today, but I'd told her that we'd have a staff meeting at 8. She probably just assumed that I'd be here by 7:30 and then she'd made sure to be here first. I used to do the same thing.

Hiring an assistant was harder than I expected. It was too weird to hire from the former White House assistants. Even though many of them are staying on in their roles. I'm glad Margaret is over there to take care of Josh. Ginger is staying on too. She's pretty happy to be back working with Sam. Carol had been ready to move to the private sector. She is working for a non-profit Veterans group. I'm not sure I could have hired a friend anyway. I didn't really want anyone who knew me as Josh's assistant. That eliminated a lot of potential candidates. Karen had previously worked for one of the under-secretaries for Transportation. We didn't deal with them much and I'd never met her. I feel confident that she understands the nature of the government beast and most importantly we hit it off.

I walk into my office and Karen follows me. I'm happy to see that my desk has a phone and a computer. The ugly lamp and painting have been removed. But there isn't any other decor. I'm glad we are meeting with Gail today. I take my coat off and look around.  
"Do we have a closet somewhere Karen?"  
"Yes, it's out there." She reaches out her hand for my coat.  
"It's okay. I'll hang it up myself. Just lead the way." I follow her back out to the main area and down towards Annabeth's office.

"Did you look over the copy room yet?" I ask Karen as we walk by it.  
"No, I just got here about 10 minutes before you."  
"Okay, when you get a chance take a look. Make sure it has everything we need." I take a look in Annabeth's office. I'm glad to see it has a computer and telephone as well.  
"Karen, can you call Gail Addison's office and see when she can meet with us? As early as possible, please. Staff meeting in my office at 8am."  
"Sure." Karen walks back to her desk and picks up the phone.

I go back into my office and log on to my computer. Today's agenda is pretty light, but I still want to print copies. It's just a good habit to get into. I should check my email to see if there are any addition appearance requests that we need to address.

As I scan through the subject lines quickly, I realize there are too many to try to read them before this meeting. I guess I know what I'll be doing this afternoon.

At 8 am, there is a light knock at my door, then Karen, Annabeth, Angela and Ned walk in. Karen has copies of the agenda in hand. We all take a seat at my conference table and she passes them out.

"Alright everybody, let's start with introductions, since we don't all know each other. I know you all know that I'm Donna, Mrs. Santos' Chief of Staff. Most recently I was a spokesperson for the Santos-McGarry campaign. Prior to that I worked in the Bartlet Administration for 7 years." I look at Annabeth.

"I'm Annabeth, I'm Mrs. Santos Press Secretary. I served as an assistant to Leo McGarry during the campaign and before that I was Deputy Press Secretary during the Bartlet Administration."

"I'm Angela. I'm Assistant Press Secretary and Blogmaster for the First Lady. I was blogmaster during the campaign. I just graduated from Penn."

"I'm Karen. I'm Donna's assistant. I was as assistant at the Department of Transportation for 6 years before this."

"I'm Ned. I'm Helen's personal assistant. I was an aide to Matt when he was a Congressman." Ned doesn't look happy to be here and I don't like how he refers to the President and Mrs. Santos by their first names. I'm going to have to speak to him about that. And he keeps giving me strange looks.

"Alright. You all have the agenda. There are a few things I want to go over before Mrs. Santos arrives. Karen, do we have a time for Gail?"  
"Yes, 10am."  
"Excellent. Once we are done here, I'd like you each to consider your office space and think of anything else you need. We'll all meet with Gail to discuss general décor for the suite."

"Annabeth- how are yesterday and today's press clippings?"  
"It's all very positive, as expected. The Washington Post has a great write up of the Feeding Children Initiative. Several other outlets at least mention it in articles."  
"Great. Let's make sure that the boutique gets nice framed signed 8x10s of the group shots. They are going to continue making donations for additional dresses purchased. I'm sure signed photos will increase sales."

"Angela what is the blog status?"  
"The First Lady page on the whitehouse dot gov site is completely up and running and has a link to our Feeding Children Blog website. That website already has the basic information and a how to get involved sidebar. I'll be uploading the Inaugural Ball gown photos this morning."  
"Outstanding. Thanks for being on top of that."

"Ned- do you have any appearance requests or correspondence to discuss?"  
"No."  
"Okay then." I can't really tell if he has things he should be discussing with us and he's holding back or if he really doesn't have any information. I'm really not sure what the deal is here.

"Alright everyone. Mrs. Santos is planning on stopping by after she's back from taking the kids to school. We'll all meet with Gail in here at 10. In the meantime, keep doing what you are doing. And let me know if you have any questions about what you should be doing." Everyone except Ned smiles and nods at me. He's a strange man.

As they file out of my office, I move back to my desk to go through the email while I wait for Helen. There are several appearance requests. I consider forwarding them to Ned but I think I'll wait until I talk to Helen about what exactly she envisions as his role.

I'm almost through the inbox when I click on an email that doesn't have a subject line. The body of the email says "How many chances do you think I'll give you?" There is an attachment. I double click without even thinking about it. It's a scan of the WaPo picture of Josh and I dancing but my dress has been photo shopped so that it's red and Josh's face has been erased. I feel myself shutter.

The intercom on my desk buzzes and Karen says "Mrs. Santos is here." 9:30. Perfect timing that gives us a half an hour to walk through the suite before Gail gets here.  
"I'll be right out."  
Mrs. Santos greets me with a hug.  
"How did drop off for the first day go?"  
Helen sighs. "Miranda was excited. Peter was nervous. The Secret Service was overwhelming. It felt weird to leave my babies in a place where every door is guarded." I'm not really sure what to say. I don't have any related experience.  
"I'm sure they'll have a great time. They'll probably want to bring friends home after school soon."  
"Sure, as long as they can pass the security clearance."  
"Have you talked to Ron about this?"  
"Yes, they actually have run a basic security clearance on all the families in their classes. They Would like 24 hours notice before the kids bring friends home so they can run more in depth clearance."  
"Oh."  
"Yeah."

"So do you want to see the office suite?"  
"Yes!" She says as she links her arm through mine. We wander through the office and Helen chats with the staff as we go.  
When we get to Ned's office he greets her with "Helen!" It's so good to see you. And gives her a hug. He does seem genuinely happy for the first time today. As Helen and I head into her office, I call back to Karen over my shoulder.  
"Let us know when Gail arrives."

Helen walks around her office once then sits behind her computer.  
"So what exactly am I supposed to do here?"  
I smile at her.  
"What?"  
"You just look good back there. That's all." She smiles back at me.  
"Well, Donna, what am I supposed to do?"

"Well, today we are going to pick out more furniture and décor for this office. Tomorrow we are going to review appearance requests and start to get an idea of the types of things you want to do. I'm going to attend Senior Staff meetings in the West Wing to see how we can support the President's agenda. We'll have some state dinners and trips to work on. This isn't a full time job but there will be plenty for you to do."

"I read a few First Ladies' biographies during the Transition. The First Ladies that had small children focused on them. I don't want a full time job. I want to raise my family. Let's plan on me being here from 9-noon each day and see what we accomplish in that time frame. If you need me other times you can come up to the residence. Do you think that will work?"  
"We will make it work. Like I told you, you are the one who decides the kind of First Lady you want to be."

Karen taps on the door, then opens it.  
"Gail is here. She's setting up on your conference table."  
"Great, we'll be right in." I'll have to wait to talk to Mrs. Santos about Ned later, I guess.


	9. Chapter 9

At 7:30, my Senior Staff arrives and arranges themselves around the room.  
"Well everybody. Now the fun begins. Who's ready to get to work?" I'm grinning at them and they are smiling back.

"Sam, you are working the Education Reform Legislation. I want you meeting with the Speaker. See what we can start with. He's not on board with lobbying reform so we'll battle on that but I want some cooperation between the White House and Congress this week. Find something they'll pass and get back to me."

"Bram, make sure you and Annabeth are coordinating the post-Inaugural spin, okay. Let's work on tying the First Lady's Feeding Children initiative into our Education Reform message. Kids that come to school hungry don't learn as well. Obviously, the two of you can work on the language. Make it sound better than that."

"Lou & Edie- I'm sure this comes as no surprise Education Reform is message of the week."

"I'll be heading up the VP Confirmation Process. We'll be submitting Eric Baker, as VP and Arnold Vinick as Secretary of State this morning around 9am. Bram, we'll want it covered in the 10am briefing, nothing more than the President submitted his nominees and looks forward to a full but speedy process and confirmation of these highly qualified candidates. Just touch base with me before 10am and make sure we are a go."

I'm still not sure about Bram in this role as Press Secretary, but President Santos has confidence in him. They've worked together for quite a while. Even if the Press Secretary position doesn't end up being the right role, we definitely want him on Senior Staff. We'll see how it goes.

I look at my watch. It's only 8am. I should have moved this meeting back a half hour once I knew the President's intention, but I want to establish a precedent. Matt isn't planning on taking the kids to school every day. I think his plan is to be in the Oval at 8 normally. So Senior Staff with me at 7:30 followed by a meeting in the Oval with the President at 8 to start out each day makes perfect sense. The question is whether to let them go back to their desks now or try to drag this out?

"Any one have any questions?" I'm met by shaking heads. Yeah, they really don't know what they are doing. They don't really even know what to ask yet.  
"Alright then, Meet in the Oval at 8:30."  
Everyone files out but Sam hangs back. He looks around.  
"You changed it back to Leo's color." I don't think I was trying to recreate Leo's office. I just really do prefer this blue to the beige that CJ had. Once everyone is out, Sam gets to his point.

"Any word on the investigation?"  
"Well they found another email from December in Donna's Spam folder. It included our wedding announcement. Based on that I don't think there is any confusion between Donna and Ainsley. But they haven't cleared Todd yet. So take that for what it's worth."  
"We'll still be cautious until they clear him, but given that Ainsley never had any contact with him it didn't seem likely anyway. But we are still worried about Donna . . . and you."  
"Me?"  
"If someone wants Donna, they would have to go through you, right?"  
"Damn straight."  
"That's why we are worried about both of you."

"Well Donna and I have a meeting with Ron this afternoon. We are going to meet the full detail and she has to turn in her list."  
"What list?"  
"I call it the Gomer List. Ron wanted a list of everyone she's dated or who has asked her out in the last ten years."  
"There can't be that many can there? You didn't really let her date."  
"Actually, there are a lot of them. I let her go out. I just sabotaged them once she did."  
"How many?"  
"Let's just say she can't remember all their names. She remembers them by what I called them or how I sabotaged the date."  
Sam is shaking his head but clearly amused. "I think I need examples."  
"Well, there's the date where I called her because I couldn't open the file cabinet, The date where I broke a shoelace and desperately needed her to bring me a new one before an important meeting, the date where I got a paper cut . . . ."

Sam is laughing out loud at this point. "You got her to leave a date because you got a paper cut?!  
"Hey it could have got infected. I couldn't find a band aid."  
"We have a medical office on site!"  
"I know. I was pretty desperate for an excuse that night. I couldn't believe that she bought it."  
"I highly doubt she bought it."  
"I know that too."  
"How is it that the two of you couldn't see what you meant to each other?"

Sam is one of my best friends and he's sincere, so I decide to be honest with him. I mean I have spent a lot of time considering this very question.  
"I know it sounds trite. But it's complicated. I really did bury my attraction to her for a long time because I would never date my assistant. I was a hard and fast rule that I made for myself long before I met Donna. For almost the entire first term I made it a point to never really examine my feelings for her or to think about why I sabotaged her dates. I never admitted to myself or anyone else that I was jealous, but when someone said she was like a little sister to me, I knew that wasn't true either."  
"That's good because that would be weird now."  
"Yeah. Definitely."  
"So when did you start to get a clue?"  
"Around the time she started dating Jack Reese, but that's also the time Amy came back into the picture."  
Sam rolls his eyes at Amy's name.  
"Amy wasn't right for you."  
"Amy wasn't Donna."  
"Well thank god for that!"

Okay, I've had enough dissecting my love life on government time.  
"Sam, I've got another job for you."  
"Okay."  
"I need you to interview candidates for a body man for the President."  
"You want me to find him a Charlie?"  
"Yeah."  
"No pressure there."  
He's right about that. Charlie was a special kid. He probably won't find anyone close. But I'd like him to try.

At 8:20 Ronna calls and let's me know that the President is in the Oval. I give him 5 minutes then knock and go through the adjoining door. I can't help but smile seeing him behind his desk. I'm just so proud of him.  
"Are you ready for this?"  
"Yes, where is everyone?"  
"They'll be here in 5."  
"Where do we do this?"  
"It just depends. We can move over to the couches and have a more informal meeting or we can stand around your desk." He gets up and walks over to a chair. I suspected that he would. I take the chair across from him.

"How did drop off go?  
"Helen was kind of a mess. It was like Miranda's first day all over again. Miranda was fine."  
"How did Peter do?"  
"He'll be fine."  
I'm sure he will but I worry about him. He only gets half a year in this school. Will he have enough time to make friends? He's so shy. I remember what switching schools midyear was like.

Right at 8:30 everyone files in. Sam leads the way and takes a place on the couch, saying-  
"Good Morning, Mr. President" as he sits. The others follow suit. Our meeting is really just a recap of what we went over in my office but I let them each "report" to the President. He has a few comments for each of them as they discuss their assignments. As I look around the room I feel pride and affection for all these people. I wonder if Leo felt the same way about us on our first day.  
"Alright then- go do good work." The President says in dismissal and everyone stands up and files out. I move over to my chair next to his desk as he takes a seat.

"Where are we on Baker?"  
"We are ready to go. This is your last chance to change your mind."  
"Josh, are you unhappy with Baker?"  
"No. I think he's a good choice. I do think this could be a battle, but I'm prepared. We will lean as hard as we can from here and we have friends ready to start a media campaign highlighting how inappropriate it would be for the Senate to block your choice for VP. We hope that's not going to be necessary. I think we may have enough moderate Republicans happy with Vinick to get by. The whip count is close but there are enough undecided to put us over."  
"Do you think we'll win it?"  
"Yeah, I do." I smile at him. "In the long run I just don't think they can get away with blocking him. We've fully vetted him. The only thing they can use is Dottie's medical history and that's a dangerous road for them too."

"Okay. Let's do it."  
"Okay. I'll send the nominations to the hill. Bram will cover them in today's 10 am briefing. From our end, the official position is these are routine. We don't make any issue of them. If Congress makes any issues. We are ready."

"What's next?"  
"Briefing memos. The stack is in your in box." The President looks at his stack of 5 like its the last thing he wants to do.  
"Don't you read these first?"  
"I have read those. I have a cart full in my office still to read." I smirk at him. Does he want to trade places?  
"Okay then."  
"Thank you, Mr. President." I say as I leave the room.


	10. Chapter 10

Helen looks at her watch. Then whispers to me "Let's try to keep this meeting as short as possible. I'm not really that into décor stuff."  
"I have a meeting with Ron Butterfield at noon, but I'd like to talk to him before Josh arrives," Helen raises her eyebrows but doesn't say anything. She's a good friend. "We can use that as an excuse if we need to. I'll just tell Gail that we only have about an hour."

Everyone is around the conference table in my office. Gail has catalogs open and a few rings of color swatches. When we sit down, Gail launches into a speech about how the First Lady's offices should be inviting and warm, an oasis of femininity in an otherwise domineering building. Helen rolls her eyes at me. I'll give Gail two more minutes to wrap up her introduction before I ask her to move on to the practical elements of this meeting.

"So Gail," I finally interrupt, "do you have some themes for us to choose between?"  
"Yes, I do." She opens a sketch book.

"First- Cherry Blossoms. The walls would have large photos of the Cherry Blossoms in bloom around Washington, with pictures of the monuments in the background. We'll paint the walls a pale blue and the blue furniture that we have out there now can remain."  
I see Helen is ready to agree and be done with this meeting. It does sound nice. But Gail is already pulling out another sketch.

"Second option- Photos from the Rose Garden. We'd paint the walls a paler shade of yellow. Of course, would want the florist's office to make sure there were constantly fresh roses in here.  
"Do any of the options not require painting?" Helen asks.  
"Well, no." Gail answers. "Those walls really do need to be freshened up. But if you really like the bright yellow, I can work something up that accommodates it. Maybe a Sunflower theme?"  
"No, no. No need." Helen quickly interjects. "I'm sure we'll be able to choose from what you've already prepared."

"The last option is vintage patriotic. Muted tones of red and blue, with creams instead of white."  
"All three of these designs use the furniture that is already out in the main office. I took the liberty basing my designs on what I thought were the best pieces of furniture that were in storage , and then I went ahead and had those sent up. But if you don't like these, we can start from scratch. I have a catalog of the furniture you could choose from."

"Oh no! That furniture is lovely." Helen quickly comments. I know she doesn't want to look at a catalog of furniture. Then she goes on "I like all three of those options. Unless anyone has any strong options against one of them. I think we should let Karen and Angela decide since they are spending the most time out in the main office." The office should really reflect Helen's taste, but if she doesn't care then I guess it doesn't matter who decides. Karen and Angela both look surprised. Angela quickly defers to Karen. "I like them all too."  
That leaves it to Karen, who seems to take this task pretty seriously. She looks over all three designs again. Finally, she says- "If it's really up to me, I choose the Cherry Blossom design. I like the photos of Washington landmarks with the softness of the Cherry Blossoms in front of them. Plus I think the light pinks and blues are soothing." Gail nods her head in approval. I think that was her favorite too.

"Mrs. Santos, would you like me to carry that theme over into your personal office, or would you prefer to pick out something different?"  
"Oh, please, carry it over."  
"Yes, of course." Gail responds. I think she's picking up on the fact that Helen really couldn't care less.  
"Well," Gail says. "I'd like to meet with each of you individually in your offices to discuss whether your furniture works for you. Obviously, this room needs a lot of work." She looks at me. I nod my head in agreement with her.

Just then we hear the buzzer to our suite. I stand up automatically, but Karen stands up at the same time. Ooops. Not my job to get the door. Karen smiles at me as she leaves the room.  
"Can I go too?" Angela asks, "I'd like to get back to the blog."  
"Yes. Why don't you each go back to your offices. Gail will be in shortly to meet with you."  
As I'm speaking, Gail gets up and starts wandering through my office contemplating the space. Helen and I walk over to the fireplace to look at it with her.

"Oh that reminds me! Do you know if this is a working fireplace?" Gail looks it over.  
"I think so. But we should check with building and maintenance. I don't think they allow fires in the fireplaces. There was an incident a few years ago."  
I start to giggle. Helen and Gail both look at me.  
"It was Josh and Sam. The heat was out and they decided to build a fire in the Mural Room. They used the decorative logs. Neither of them bothered to read the plaque that stated that the flue had been welded shut for a hundred years." I start giggling louder. "The President had to stand on the Truman balcony in his underwear!" Helen is laughing along with me. Probably imagining Matt in his underwear on the balcony. Suddenly, she stops.

"DONNA! What is that?!" She sounds horrified. I turn to look at her and see her pointing to my computer. The email is still open to the photo shopped picture of Josh and me. I shrug.  
"I got another email today."  
"Have you told Josh?"  
I chuckle a bit. " I opened it just before you got here. Believe me, you'd know if I already told Josh."

"Did you forward it to Ron?"  
"No, I sort of thought they were already getting these."

Helen hits the intercom button.  
"Karen- This is Mrs. Santos. Get Ron Butterfield on the phone for me, please."

Gail looks a little taken back. I try to direct her attention back to my office.  
"I'd like a sitting area over there. A couch, a couple chairs some end tables. I'm not picky. I'm sure whatever you pick will be lovely. If the Rose Garden decor would work in here that's fine. If not, whatever you choose. I'd also like at least one credenza with drawers for files. Perhaps against that wall?"  
"Okay." Gail says. "I'll see what we have."  
"Go ahead and meet with the others. I'm not sure what my availability is going to be for the rest of the day. As long as their needs can be met using furniture in storage, go ahead and implement it. But if any purchases need to be made, I want to discuss them first."  
"Thank you, Mrs. Lyman." Gail says as she gathers her things and heads out to meet with Annabeth.

The intercom buzzes. "I have Ron Butterfield on line one."  
Helen picks up the phone.  
"Ron, this is Helen. Donna received another email. Should she forward it to you or do you want to come look at it?" Helen is in what I imagine is Mom-mode. No nonsense, taking care of her family. I find that I actually don't mind.  
"It's another picture." She tells Ron.  
"No, she hasn't told Josh." It's not like I've avoided telling him. I literally haven't had time. Not that I want to tell him. He has enough stress right now and way too much guilt over things that aren't his fault.  
"Okay. We'll see you in a few minutes." Helen hangs up the phone.

"He's coming here. Are you okay?"  
"Yes." I really am. The email took me off-guard but these still don't feel threatening. Sooner or later this guy's going to give up, right? I'm not going to let some loser dictate my life.

"Ron Butterfield is here." Karen announces over the intercom.  
Well, that didn't take long.  
"Please send him in." Helen stands up. "I'm going to leave you two alone and see if I can find something to do in my office."  
"Okay. I'll stop in before I meet Josh at noon."

Ron greets Mrs. Santos as she leaves the office, then comes around behind my desk. He doesn't say anything as he looks over the email. It looks like he forwards it to someone. Then he scrolls through the inbox, looking for other emails, I suppose.

"Why didn't you call me when you first opened this?"  
"Mrs. Santos had just arrived. I needed to do my job."  
"I'm sure she would have understood, Donna."  
"I'm not trying to keep it from you, Ron. I really would have followed up on it. We already had a meeting scheduled for noon. Plus, I thought your office was monitoring my email."  
"We are, but that just means someone checks your email at the beginning and end of the day. Since he's using different computers and addresses every time, we can't just re-route the emails. The reason I want you to let me know immediately is that he's sending them from public locations. We might have a chance of catching him while he still there if we know about it immediately."  
"Oh. I didn't realize that. I'm sorry. Next time I'll let you know."

"Since you're here now, let me give you my list." I hand it to him. "I'd like you to keep the last name from Josh."  
Ron grimaces. I know I'm putting him in an awkward position.

"I think you'll understand once I explain."  
I motion for Ron to take a seat at the conference table, and we both sit down.

"When I was nineteen I started dating an older man. I eventually dropped out of college and moved in with him. I worked and paid all our bills while he finished the last year of med school and completed his residency. We were going to get married but I eventually realized that was a bad idea. I left him and joined the Bartlet Campaign. Josh knows all that but doesn't know his name. I'd like to keep it that way. Josh just calls him Dr. Freeride."

"Well, you know, Josh has access to your FBI file. I'm sure that when you were vetted to work in the White House back in '98 you had to disclose all addresses and roommates from the last 10 years. That would include this information. Wouldn't it?" Ron looks at me intently for a few minutes.  
"If Josh wanted to know this man's name- he could easily find out."  
Ron's right. I guess in the back of my mind I've always known that. But it's different if I tell Josh. And there are things about that time in my life that I just want to leave in the past.

Ron interrupts my internal thoughts with another question.  
"Donna, is there reason to think this man could be violent towards you?"  
"Yes." I respond looking directly into Ron's eyes, but not offering any further information. In my mind, I'm begging Ron not to ask me for details.

"Donna, how do you think this is going to work without Josh finding out?"  
"I'm hoping you look into it and can quickly determine that it wasn't Dr. Freeride and we never have to discuss it again. He's already consumed too much of my life. I don't want to give him even one more minute. He doesn't deserve to have someone like Josh spend even one moment of focus on him."

Ron looks at me sympathetically. But I don't really want sympathy. I've moved on with my life.  
"If we have to talk about him, I'd appreciate it if you would call him Dr. Freeride. I don't like to hear or say his name out loud."  
Ron puts a hand on top of mine.  
"Donna, what did he do to you?"

"It just didn't work out. I haven't had any contact with him in the last 8 years. I'm sure he found a suitable wife and moved on with his life." I look at my watch and stand up. It's almost noon.

"I really don't think it's him, Ron. He wasn't one for subtlety. I'm sorry, I need to meet with Helen before our noon meeting. Can I just meet you back downstairs in a few minutes?"  
Ron nods at me, and stands up then we both leave my office. It's only then that I realize that Ron didn't actually say yes to my request.


	11. Chapter 11

Donna and I meet up in the lobby of Ron's office. I give her a kiss on the cheek. It was nice always having her just outside my office, within bellowing distance, but being able to greet her with a kiss is much nicer. Ron's secretary leads us into the conference room. I place my hand on the small of Donna's back as I follow her into the room.

There are about 20 agents standing behind Ron. Seeing them all together is a bit sobering. This is a lot of people working to keep my family safe. I feel a surge of profound gratitude. But honestly, I don't know if I'm going to be able to remember all of these names.

Ron introduces each team and explains how the rotations work. Scott and Phil are my lead agents. Jackie and Kathy are Donna's lead agents. During our waking hours, we will each have one of them with us. Overnight, the number of agents will be reduced, partially because we are choosing not to keep the town car outside of the Brownstone while we sleep. The town car will be waiting for us by 5 am. Ron wants additional agents back on the detail starting then. Once we get to the White House, they will do shift changes and have breaks as we are in the building. I'm not sure I understand all the details of how this works. I guess all I really need to do is try to remember these faces and trust them to protect us.

Ron dismisses the agents and asks Donna and me to step into his office. Donna looks nervous, so I take her hand. She smiles tentatively at me.

Once we are seated. Ron begins by addressing Donna, "the email you opened this morning was sent from a public library in Arlington. As far as content, it is about what we expected."

"WHAT EMAIL?!" I can't help but raise my voice, looking between Ron and Donna. I feel like I've been left out of the loop.

Ron raises his eyebrows at Donna and she makes a face. It's her "oops, I forgot to tell you something" face. She turns to me and starts talking quickly.

"I opened an email this morning right as Helen was arriving, once she found out about it she called Ron, and he came up and looked at it, but then we had this meeting and I didn't have time to call you."

"So you _didn't_ call either Ron or me as soon as you opened it?" I pin her with a stern look. I'm not happy about this.

"No." She says in a small voice. She knows she's in trouble.

"How long was it before you told anyone?"

"Not quite two hours." She looks fairly contrite.

" _Donna_." I sigh. What am I going to do with her? I just don't get the sense that she's taking this seriously. If she's not going to take it seriously, how am I supposed to let her out of my sight? It's too bad I can't just wrap her up in bubble wrap and keep her on the couch in my office while we are at work.

"Ron already read me the riot act. _I'm sorry_. I didn't know that I needed to report new emails immediately. I thought the secret service was monitoring them. We are all busy! We have a country to run."

This situation is so stressful. I'm torn between wanting to be cross with her and being proud of her for not letting it get to her. I'm not sure where the balance is. At least it doesn't sound like she was trying to keep something from me. I feel slightly calmer.

"Okay, someone want to fill me in?" I look at Ron.

"The email is a copy of the picture from the Washington Post of the two of you dancing. That mean's it's likely that the stalker was not present at any of the balls."

"Well, that's good, right?" I ask Ron.

"Well, yes, obviously we prefer a situation where this individual doesn't have direct access to you or Donna." Ron goes on-

"The text of the email was " _How many chances do you think I'll give you?_ " which tells us that the stalker is still hopeful that Donna will accept him."

I don't like that some loser wants my wife, but in a small way, it is comforting that he's not actually threatening her. We just have to find out who this is and stop him before this becomes more dangerous.

"He photo-shopped the picture so that Donna's dress is red. But what we find troubling is that he erased your face from the photo. He sees you as something to be eliminated. You are in as much, if not more, danger than Donna."

As Ron finishes describing the email, Donna starts hyperventilating.

Ron pulls a paper bag out of his desk drawer and instructs Donna to breath into it. This is apparently not the first time this has happened in his office.

Her eyes have a wild, scared look in them that is crushing me, but I lock eyes with her and try to get her to match her breathing to mine.

"Baby, breathe slowly. In . . . out. In . . . out."

After a few minutes, she doesn't look quite so freaked out. Although she is still pretty pale. Well, I guess the reality of this situation just came crashing down on her.

"Sorry. I never considered that Josh could be in danger."

I'm once again blown away by my wife. When it's her life, she's as cool as a cucumber. When it's mine, she has a panic attack. She has things so backward.

Ron gives us both a steadying look.

"We are still checking out the libraries from where the emails were sent. Hopefully that will give us user names and perhaps security footage will give us a photo."

Ron gives Donna a sympathetic look before he continues.

"We are going over the names on Donna's list. Hopefully we can quickly eliminate some of them because they haven't been in the DC area recently. If this is an ex-boyfriend, I really don't expect this to be someone from more than five years ago, but it's possible that your recent public appearances rekindled some desire. If it is someone you know, it's more likely within the last year or two. But we will want to look at every possibility. I know you had trouble remembering some of the names of the older one-time dates, even though it's probably not one of those, please let me know if you end up remembering anything more."

Ugh. I don't want to spend a lot of time rehashing those dates with Donna, especially if Ron doesn't think it's likely to be one of those Gomers. On the other hand, I want to do everything we can to resolve this situation as quickly as possible.

"I also want to remind you that this situation still appears to be more like what we call a "famous stalker." Usually with an ex-boyfriend stalking, it's not a mystery. They are very blatant and possessive. This still looks more like someone who saw Donna on TV and became fixated. There is nothing in these emails to indicate that Donna has previously met this person. That's why we need to be extra vigilant when you are out in public."

"Was the Starbucks run this morning a bad idea?" I haven't asked Donna how that went, but I'm wondering what Ron thinks of it.

"Not necessarily. It was impromptu, so the only way the stalker would know is if he was following the motorcade. The agents are watching for that kind of behavior. It is easier for us to protect you here, and it's easier for us to protect you together. An occasional coffee run isn't a problem, but right now we'd rather not have it become routine or predictable. Okay?"

After Donna and I both nod, he says "There's really nothing else we can accomplish right here, right now. Go get some lunch. Spend a little time together before you need to get back to work." He gives me a look that says "Take care of your wife."

I give him another nod and wrap my arm around Donna as we leave the office.

"What should we do about lunch?"

"I'm not really hungry."

That has me frowning. I don't like it when she doesn't eat. On the other hand, I don't necessarily want to be in public right now. We were going to pick something up and eat in her office. Maybe I can send her assistant to get us some soup from the Mess?

"Do you have a couch in your office?"

"Not yet."

"Maybe we should go to mine? I can have Margaret get us some soup. I really want you to eat something."

"But I wanted to show you my office," she pouts.

I give her an appraising look. "Hold out your hand."

She looks at me inquisitively, but does as I said. Her hand is still shaking slightly.

"My office. Soup. Rest." I state firmly. Then I kiss her forehead.

"I'll come see your office tonight before we head home." I place my hand on the small of her back and guide her toward the West Wing.

As we are walking, I flip my phone open and call Margaret.

"Change of plans. Donna and I are going to eat in the office. Can you go to the Mess and get a bowl of chicken noodle soup with a roll and a Turkey Sandwich. Thanks."

Once we are in the office, I steer Donna to the couch. I sit down and open my arms. She gives me a small smile and then practically falls into my lap and nestles her head against my chest. I lift her legs on to the couch and turn her so she's more comfortable, then I wrap one arm firmly around her waist and one around her shoulders. I've perfected this position. This way I can hold her tight while still stroking her head.

After she's listened to my heartbeat for several minutes, she sighs deeply. I'm still in awe that my heartbeat is the thing that provides her the most comfort.

"Better?"

"Yeah." She says, but it still comes out a little shaky.

"What happened back there?"

"I just didn't really feel threatened until Ron said you were in danger."

"Well, I guess now you know how I feel. I want you to take this seriously because I'm worried about you."

"It just didn't feel like that big of a deal. Just another stupid guy that doesn't quite know when to stop."

My eyes narrow. "How many of those stupid guys have you had to deal with over the years?"

She sighs. "Too many. A lot of guys think when they buy you two drinks it means they can put their hands wherever they want. And a second date with dinner means you are willing to sleep with them."

I feel my blood start to boil. I knew I was right to sabotage her dates. Stupid gomers.

"I'm sorry."

"What are you sorry for?"

"For not sabotaging more of your dates."

She gives me a real smile then. "You really were something."

"Which was your favorite?" I ask her, and she knows exactly what I mean.

"The time you told me you stapled your tie to your desk and there was no one around to get you free."

"That one was kind of pathetic- why'd you come back?"

"Because I knew a reason like that was really a choice. Stay on the date if I wanted or come back to you if I wanted an out."

"You always came back."

"Yes. I did."


	12. Chapter 12

We are almost done with our lunch when Josh clears his throat and looks serious.

"There's something else I need to talk to you about. I'm sorry I yelled at you this morning. I don't want to yell at you. But, you have to decide if you are getting up and going with me or if you need to take a separate car. I don't think mornings like this one are good for either one of us."

"I want to go in with you. I like riding together." And after what Ron said earlier, I don't really want to let him out of my sight.

He smiles gently at me. "I really want you to ride with me, but I have to be here on time. I think you need to set a back up alarm. I'll still try to wake you up, but if you choose not to get up to the gentle, loving, Josh then it's the alarm's job to get your ass out of bed."

"What if I ignore the alarm?"

"Did you ever do that before?"

"No."

"Then why would you start now? You like this job, right? You have just as much motivation to go to work as you ever did. Why would this suddenly become an issue?"

Hmmm. When he puts it that way I realize I don't have a good answer. Up until this morning, I've enjoyed our little morning ritual where I make him work to get me out of bed. I sort of thought of it like bantering. But I think I took it too far. This morning stressed him out more than I realized. It really wasn't fair to him. I feel really bad. And I don't want to admit it, but just for a second his serious voice scared me. I know he'd never hurt me, but I don't want to wake up to yelling either. I hang my head a little. I'm suddenly really embarrassed by my childish behavior. So much for professional Donna.

"Hey." He tilts my chin up and studies my eyes, which feel a little wet at the moment. I swear to god, I'm not going to cry. I know how that makes him feel and he's got no reason to feel guilty. I blink a couple times until I've got it under control.

"You're right. I'm sorry. It was sort of a game at first, but I was out of line this morning. I promise, I'll get up when you ask me to. I really like it when you wake me up. I don't want to have to rely on an alarm clock." The thought of a cold bed and blaring alarm almost makes me lose the grip that I have on my tears.

Josh wraps me back in his arms and kisses the top of my head.

"I really like waking you up, but we don't need any more stress right now. Please don't make me be the bad guy any more."

God, I feel really horrible for how I've been treating him. We just sit there for a few minutes with my head on his chest. This really is my favorite position in the whole world.

Eventually, he glances at his watch. "I wish I could walk you back to your office but I have a 1:15 with the President."

"It's fine, Josh. My agent is right outside the door."

He walks me to his door and gently kisses my cheek. "Matt plans on heading to the residence around 6. I'll stop by your office then."

"Okay."

I walk back to my office slowly. It's been a rough morning. I guess it can only get better from here.

Karen greets me as I walk in the door-

"Everything okay? You look a little pale."

"Honestly, I've had better days."

"Well there's something in your office that should perk you up."

I walk in and find a huge bouquet on the conference table. Josh must have ordered them yesterday. I pluck out the little card.

[You've got this, just take it one day at a time.]

How did he know exactly what I would need to hear today when he ordered flowers yesterday? The man amazes me. The hill has no idea who "Bartlet's Bulldog" really is. I couldn't be any more in love with MY Joshua Lyman.

There's still an hour before the kids get home and I'd like to talk to Helen about Ned. Plus I know she wants to know how the meeting with Ron went. Maybe I can head up to the residence and have this conversation with Helen now, then be there when the kids get home to hear about their day.

On the other hand, I don't want to intrude. So what's better, do I have Karen call Mrs. Santos or should I call Helen myself? I guess since she's in the residence, I'll call her myself. This conversation is going to be half business, half personal. But if we are having it in the residence in private, I'll be using her first name so I shouldn't use my assistant to initiate the call. I hope we eventually figure out the balance between work and friendship.

"Helen, Can I come up and finish our conversation from earlier?"

"Sure, come on up. I'm making cookies. The kids will be home soon."

"Great. I'll be there in a little bit."

When I get to the residence, I find Helen in the kitchen. She is, indeed, making cookies. Should I tell her that the executive chef will make whatever kind of cookies they'd like?

"So how'd your meeting with Ron go?"

"It was a little rough."

"Did Josh take you to task for not reporting it right away?"

"Yeah."

"You _know_ how the guys are. They freak out any time they think there is the slightest chance one of us is in danger. Do you remember how they were when we sneaked away in Cleveland?"

"You were the one that just wanted to slip into that store and look at those scarves."

She grins at me. "Matt threatened to beat me."

I must look shocked because she giggles. "That's code for you really scared me, but I want to look tough right now, once I get you alone I'm going to make love to you for hours."

"Josh threatened to fire me."

"What's that code for?" She asks with a smirk and a wink.

"Um . . . I'm not really sure. When I was his assistant, he threatened to fire me on a regular basis. It usually meant I was right about something, and he was wrong. I was impervious. But that time in Cleveland was the only time that he threatened to fire me during the campaign. I think he was serious. That was a major screw up on my part- sneaking away put you in danger."

"I think what he really wanted to do was "beat" you." Helen uses air quotes for emphasis, and she's got a wicked gleam in her eyes.

I just smile at her but then it dawns on me that she's probably right. At the time, I thought it really was about work. I hadn't done my job right. But now I can see, it's more likely he was just worried about me and expressing it the only way he knew how- with an empty threat. I smirk to myself. We haven't really moved beyond the empty threats, they are just of a different nature now. We do have a lot in common with Matt and Helen.

"While we are waiting for the kids, can we talk about Ned for a minute?"

"Sure. What's up?"

"Well, I didn't meet him on the campaign. He's worked for the President a long time, right?"

"Yes."

"Is he a family friend or something?"

"No, but he's been loyal to us for years. Matt and I felt bad when Josh decided to shake up the campaign staff and let him go. Josh said Ned wasn't really ready for a campaign so Matt moved him back to the Congressional office to field calls and mail."

Ah. That might explain the dirty looks he keeps giving me. If Josh basically fired him, and he figured out that I'm married to Josh, I can see why he doesn't seem to like me. But Helen doesn't need to know that. I'll handle it myself.

"So what role do you envision for him?"

"He can handle phone calls and mail. I'll give him errands to run. The kids know him and he's pretty good with them, so he may end up working on school stuff with me. He's a nice guy, Donna, I'm sure we can find things for him to do."

It sounds like he'll end up being more of a "body man" for Helen. That should make things easier for me, unless he thinks he's going to have a lot of control over her schedule or say in office operations.

"Okay then, as far as emails requesting personal appearances as First Lady, if he gets any I'd like him to forward them to me and the social secretary. The decision about appearances is really an office wide decision, with you having final say, of course."

Helen nods as she continues to spoon cookie dough onto a tray.

"As far as correspondence, you do have a whole office for general mail, but you can have him deal with personal mail if you prefer. He can also answer your direct line in the office. That's not a published number so it will mostly be internal calls."

"Okay."

"Ned will be part of the office staff. He'll be in the know as much as anyone else about your schedule, but he shouldn't be adding to it or shaping it on his own."

"That sounds fine with me."

"I'll have a meeting with him later today or tomorrow to go over his role. One thing though, I am going to remind him that he needs to call you Mrs. Santos while we are in the office, and while around other people. It really is important. And he'd better remember to say Mr. President about Matt when he's around Josh!"

Helen laughs at that. "I'm sure he'll try to avoid being around Josh."

"As far as the office staff goes, based on your schedule, I think I'm going to have their regular hours be 8:30-5. I'll be in the office around 7 because I plan to come in with Josh. I suspect that Karen will match my hours no matter what I tell her. I'll attend Senior Staff in the West Wing. That way I can keep up with what's going on over there. We'll plan to have a staff meeting in the office with you at 9. Then around 4, I'll have another staff meeting, without you, to go over what we've accomplished and plan for the next day. That meeting helps keep the stupid stuff off your radar."

Helen smiles at me. "You sound like Josh right now."

I smile back. That's a really nice compliment.

"This is exactly why I hired you Donna. I know you will help me find the right balance between First Lady and Helen. I'm going to help you find a balance between Chief of Staff and Donna. Now, do you want a spoonful of cookie dough before the kids get here?"

"Of course!" I'll take raw cookie dough whenever I can get it. Nothing's better at getting over a rough day than cookie dough. Why don't guys understand that? God knows Josh would freak out if he finds out I was eating uncooked eggs.

Helen and I clink our spoons together. We do make a good team.


	13. Chapter 13

"Well, at least things are holding steady in Kazakhstan." The President says as we leave the security briefing at 4:45. "But I gotta tell you, I don't like being stuck in the middle of this giant game of chicken."

"I hear you. Hey, do you mind if I zip up to the residence for a few minutes? I told Peter I'd stop by at the end of the day and see how his first day of school went."

"I'm sure he'd like that." Matt responds.

"I don't want to step on any toes by asking him about his day before you get a chance. I'm not going to get you in trouble with your wife am I?"

Matt laughs. "Your wife already beat you to it. She was up there waiting for them when they got home from school. Helen is fine with me working until 6 then having a family dinner."

"Alright then, I'll be back in my office shortly." Phil follows me as I head toward the residence. When I get there, Peter is sitting at the kitchen table doing homework.

"Hey man, how'd it go?"

"Tio Josh!" He gives me a big smile. "It was okay. This school is different than my old school though."

"Oh yeah? In what ways?"

"Well in my old school, there weren't any little kids. It was just 5th and 6th grade and we didn't spend the whole day with the same teacher. We switched classrooms for each subject. Here we had the same teacher all day."

"Did you like your teacher?"

"I guess. Her name is Mrs. Johnson. She made me stand in front of the class while she introduced me. But then she said Peter is one of us now so treat him like anyone else, with kindness and respect. I don't know it just felt weird."

"I switched schools once too. I think maybe it's always weird when you don't start at the same time as everyone else."

"Did you make any friends that year?"

"I did. I made one good friend. And that was enough."

Peter thinks about it for a minute. Hopefully, he's thinking about which kids might become a friend.

"So homework?" I ask him. That gets him laughing.

"Yes. I'm almost done. I was saving social studies for last." He hands me a worksheet titled "All about the new President."

"Well I guess you don't need any help then." I ruffle his hair. "Speaking of the new President. I need to get back downstairs. He'll be up in about an hour. I'm glad your first day was okay."

Just before 6pm, the President is packing up his briefcase.

"I'll take these memos with me, but I'm going to have dinner with my family. I'm going to hear all about the kids' first day at school. I'm going to help them with their homework, play a game, and tuck them in. Then I'm going to spend some time with my wife. THEN I'll look at some of these for an hour or two."

"Okay." I wonder if Peter saved that social studies worksheet to do with his Dad. Matt will get a kick out of it. I'm sure the curriculum was planned well before President Santos was elected and before they knew Peter would be attending that school.

"Josh. You can take some work home with you if you'd like but I want you out of the office within the next 30 minutes unless there is an emergency. Get Donna and go home, or out to dinner, or something. Spend some time together that isn't focused on this place. Understand?"

"Yes, sir."

He smiles at me, then heads out the door. It's 6:05 and I've been ordered to be out of the building before 7pm. This definitely isn't the Bartlet Administration. I walk back into my office and put as many briefing memos as will fit in my backpack to take with me. There are more to read than will fit. I'm not quite sure if this is going to work, but we'll give it a try.

I take my coat out of the closet and walk out to Margaret's office. She looks up.

"Where are you going and when will you be back?"

"Home and 7 a.m."

She looks shocked and I feel guilty.

"President Santos' orders. He wants us all to have a life! So we are going to try this. I'll tell you the same thing he told me. I want you out of here within the next 30 minutes. I'll see you in the morning."

Margaret purses her lips in a way that I can't tell if she's pleased. Doesn't she have a small child? There are no photos on her desk and I hate to ask. If she has a little one, I would think she'd be happier for something closer to normal hours. Maybe Donna knows.

"You're really leaving?"

"Yes. I'm going to get Donna now."

"Okay, then." She sounds resigned.

She really is kind of an odd woman. Most assistants would be happy their boss is leaving early. But she's very good at what she does. I'm going to try to make sure I don't take her for granted.

"Thanks, for everything today, Margaret. I know this job is going to be so much easier with you keeping this office together."

She looks a little surprised but smiles at me.

"I mean it. If I have to leave, you have to leave." I remind her as I walk out the door.

I'm looking forward to seeing Donna's office. I know it stressed her out that they switched suites on the First Lady at the last minute. I had expected her to show me yesterday but she said it was "a vast wasteland of nothingness." She smiled while she said it though, so I'm not really sure what that means. And she did seem eager to show it to me today.

When I get to the door I consider buzzing but I just turn the knob and walk in. I'm the Chief of Staff, I don't really have to wait.

As I walk through the door, I startle a woman sitting at a desk. It must be Karen, Donna's assistant. Her head jerks up but then she relaxes when she recognizes me.

"Oh! Mr. Lyman. I'll let Donna know you're here."

She uses the intercom to announce me. Donna must love that. I glance around the office. Donna's right, it needs some decor.

"I'll be right out." Donna says and a minute later she's greeting me with a big smile.

"Josh, this is Karen. Karen, this is Josh."

"Nice to meet you." Karen says shaking my hand.

"Now, Karen, would you _please_ go home!" Donna pleads with her assistant.

"Yes, if you're sure you won't need anything."

"We are under orders to be out of the building by 6:30." I tell Karen. "That goes for you as well."

"Okay." Karen says as she shuts down her computer.

"Come see my office." Donna sounds like Miranda for a minute. She wants me to be impressed, so I'm determined I will be.

She takes my hand and lead me down the hall. As she holds open the door, I see her watching my face.

"Holy Mother of God, this is huge!" I don't have to pretend to be impressed. I am. I look over at her and she's beaming. God. I'm so proud of her. She worked really hard to get to this place.

"It's amazing, babe." I wrap my arms around her and give her a spin and she laughs. It feels nice to be happy together.

"Hey- you have a fireplace. We could get cozy in here. It's too bad you don't have a couch."

"No fires, Josh. Apparently they made it an official rule after your last experience."

I look around her office a little more. It's pretty barren. At least the flowers arrived. They're sitting on her conference table. She see me eyeing them.

"Thank you." She rewards me with a kiss. "They were just what I needed when I got back from lunch."

"So are you getting some décor in here or do we need to go shopping?" Please god, let the decor be on it's way.

"We met with Gail Addison this morning. I think she's going to do a Rose Garden theme in here. I'll be getting a sitting area with a couch over there."

Hmm, if its a Rose Garden theme I guess from now on I'll order roses for her.

"Good. What about the rest off the office?"

"Do you want to see it?"

"Sure." She links her arm through mine and walks me around.

"Gail is going to have the walls painted pale blue. The art work is going to feature the Cherry Blossoms and Washington landmarks."

"This is Annabeth's office. . . . This is Helen's office . . . This is Ned's office."

"Ned Carlson?"

"Yeah."

"Oh god."

"Yeah. I was wondering why he kept giving me dirty looks all day, but then Helen explained your special relationship with him."

"He was giving you dirty looks? I'll kick his ass."

"Josh. I've got it covered. I already had a meeting with him and laid down the law. I can handle it."

"I know you can." But just because I know she can handle it doesn't mean I don't want to handle it for her.

"So, ready to go home?"

Once we are in the door, Donna heads straight for the bedroom to change. We are developing our own little rituals and this is one of them. I settle on the bed to watch her. This doesn't ever get old. Once she's in comfortable clothes, her next thought is dinner.

"I'll go check the refrigerator to see what our options are." She says while I get up. I might as well lose the suit too.

A minute later she pops her head back into the bedroom. She grins at catching me half-dressed.

"I forgot to get something out to thaw this morning." She looks sheepish. I just shake my head. I'm not going to chastise her again for this morning's fiasco. I just really hope it's behind us.

"Do you want to order in?" I ask her. I've really come to enjoy making dinner together but I don't have a problem with take-out either.

"That or we have breakfast for dinner." She responds.

"You keep offering that but we never do it. Is that really a thing?"

She looks at me skeptically. "You've never had breakfast for dinner?"

"No. I've had breakfast for breakfast. And dinner for dinner. Call me strange."

"You are strange. You're serious?"

"Yes."

"Well then, it's about time to enlighten you. Basically anything you make for breakfast, you can make and eat in the evening. So we can have pancakes, scrambled eggs, sausage, a whole meal." She's teasing me and I'm enjoying it. But I'm about to retaliate with some tickling.

"Sassy tonight are we?" I ask as I move toward her. She sees my intention and tries to move around the table, but I've pretty much got her cornered. She's giggling before I even lay a finger on her.

After a few minutes of tickling we're ready to head to the bedroom, but then Donna's stomach growls. I swear, if it didn't we'd never end up eating.

"Just ignore it," she groans.

"Not a chance." I give her a grin. "You were about to enlighten me. Remember?"

"Alright. Do you want turkey sausage or hash?"

"Sausage."

Donna grabs the sausage from the freezer and the eggs from the refrigerator.

"Do you have some reading you want to do while I get this ready?"

"I have some reading to do later, but I really like it when we make dinner together. What can I do?"

She hands me the box of pancake mix.

"Follow the directions and mix up the batter."

While I get started on that, she pulls out 3 frying pans. I didn't even know that we owned 3 frying pans. She puts the smallest one on the back burner and starts the sausage. Then she cracks 5 eggs into a bowl, adds a splash of milk to it, then whisks it until it's frothy.

"You're really good at this cooking thing." I tell her and she blushes.

"I think your expectations are pretty low."

It's moments like this that drive me a little nuts. Sometimes I don't think she sees how much she puts herself down. I don't know if it was her parents expectations or what, but she's amazing.

"No. I waited a long time for you because no one measured up. You amaze me everyday. You may not be a gourmet chef- but I bet you could be if you wanted. Anyway, I don't need a gourmet chef. I just need you."

After breakfast for dinner, which was pretty tasty, Donna shoos me out of the kitchen.

"Go. Do some reading for a while. I'll clean up in here."

I don't have to be told twice when I get out of clean up duty.


	14. Chapter 14

"Good morning, sweetheart." I hear as I open my eyes and stretch. Josh is running his hand up and down my arm and smiling at me. This is such a great way to wake up.

"What time is it?" I ask as he leans down to kiss me.

"8. Are you coming to the office with me?"

He's already wearing jeans and a sweater. It's our first Saturday of the Santos Administration. Heck yeah, I'm coming.

"I told you that I wanted to last night."

"I know but it is Saturday. I just wanted to give you the chance to change your mind if you wanted to sleep in some more. You've been doing so well getting up early this week."

He teases, tickling me a little.

"Hey, better not start something if you want me to get out of bed."

"Hey, baby, I'd like nothing more than to keep you in bed all day, but since I can't join you- I guess I'll let you get up." He smirks.

"How long do I have to get ready?"

"We'll go in whenever you are ready, but the sooner we get there the sooner we can be done and get on with our day."

"Time me." I grin at him.

Twenty minutes later, we are in the back of the town car on our way. It's such a quick trip on a Saturday morning that I won't even have time to finish my coffee.

"So do you actually have anything to do in your office?" Josh asks me.

"Not really." Helen's not really ready to start making appearances yet and the Feeding Children initiative doesn't really have anything to work on right now."

"Besides, I think they are painting in there this weekend."

"What are you going to do then?"

"Well, I figured I'd sit and watch you for a while. I don't know, maybe I can help you like I used to? If there is something you'd have Margaret do, I could do it."

"You don't have to do that."

"I know. I want to. I'm an aide to the President and if I can help you, I'm helping him. Besides, it's not like I didn't like assisting you- I just didn't want it to be the only thing."

He gives me a long kiss as we pull up to the portico. I can already tell this is going to be the best Saturday we ever spent in the White House.

Josh is reading briefing memos and I'm bored out of my mind. This is the worst Saturday I've ever spent in the White House. I get up and wander around his office. Picking stuff up, looking it over and putting it down.

"They say married people start acting like each other eventually." Josh suddenly says.

"What?"

"Well, this just seems like role reversal. I'm sitting here reading quietly while you are a bundle of energy about to break something. Is this how you felt when I hovered around you?"

I get an evil idea. I walk over to his desk and shove a memo aside and sit on it facing him. Then I use my sexy voice to ask him-

"How do you feel right now?"

"I want to push you down on this desk and have my way with you."

I smile at him brightly then stand up and walk way.

"Yep. That is how I felt when you hovered around me."

I leave Josh sitting there with his mouth hanging open and wander out to Margaret's desk to see if she has anything interesting to look at. She actually has a brochure on her shelf on the care and feeding of goldfish. I guess I might as well read that. I may be called into service for Gail.

Ten minutes later, Josh comes out to Margaret's office.

"Did you know that goldfish can live 8-14 days without food?"

"Um, no. I didn't know that."

"But their water should be changed twice a week. Most goldfish die because they are overfed and under cared for."

"Margaret's in charge of Gail."

"That's good."

"So. . . " He starts hesitantly. "I need to make a couple of calls. Do some Senatorial hand-holding on the confirmations . . ."

That perks me up. I think he's going to give me something to do. Thank god. I hate not feeling useful.

". . . would you mind placing the calls?"

I stand up and kiss him right on the mouth. "Who do you want first?"

"Seth Gillette. I want to make sure he's on board with Vinick. Remind him that a moderate Republican appointment will ease the skids for Baker. Once you have him on the line with me, call Senator Bowles office and see if Ryan is there. Bowles will be on board for Vinick but I want to see where we stand on Baker with him. After you talk to Ryan let me know if I need to talk to Bowles myself."

As he heads back into his office, I pick up the phone.

"Josh Lyman's office for Senator Gillette." Man, that feels good.

Once I had something to do my Saturday got a lot better. Between the phone calls, I actually did make a shopping list. This is going to be our first shopping trip with a detail.

As the motorcade pulls up to Trader Joe's, I wonder how this is going to work. They certainly won't clear the whole store, right? Kevin is the agent in charge today. He didn't look very happy when I said I wanted to stop on the way home. Josh looks even less thrilled than usual about this chore as well.

Kevin rolls down the paritian as the car stops in front of the store.  
"Okay, Mr. & Mrs. Lyman, this is how this is going to work. We'll have an agent clear each aisle as you shop. An agent will be on either end of the aisle and one will accompany you direct. I need to you stay together at all times, we are already spreading ourselves pretty thin for this operation."

"Let's call it 'Operation What's for Dinner!" I quip. Neither Kevin nor Josh look amused.

"When you are done shopping, a manager will check you out at a separate lane. How much shopping do you need to do?"

I pull out my list. It's pretty long. I like to shop for a couple weeks worth of food at a time.

Kevin and Josh both groan. My shoulders slump.

"Just take us home. We'll do take out." I admit defeat, trying not to sound too upset.

Kevin perks up, but Josh shoots that idea down.

"No. We are taking reasonable precautions but we are not giving up our life. But let's compromise. Can we get only what we need for tonight and tomorrow? Then once we are home we'll figure out a strategy for grocery shopping that works for everyone?"

"Alright." Kevin and I both say reluctantly.

"Chicken or Meatloaf?" I ask Josh.

"Chicken." He quickly responds. I'm not surprised.

Ugh. Now I have to look over my list and figure out what we need for tonight and tomorrow instead of just buying everything on it. I'm not convinced that this compromise is actually going to save time.

As we walk in the doors, we get a lot of stares and whispers. The agents are on high alert. Josh grabs a cart. This is going to be weird.

We head to produce first. I grab a bag of potatoes, 2 heads of lettuce, some cucumbers and tomatoes. Yes it's more than for just tonight but at least then we'll have some other food in the house.

In the meat department, I pick up a family size package of chicken. Josh raises his eyebrows at me. I'll freeze what we don't use tonight. Then I grab a large package of ground beef too. We're here! It's not saving any time NOT to get it now.

"Can we go to the Bakery Department and get something to bring to the brunch or would you rather stop tomorrow on the way?" I ask in Josh's general direction.

Kevin responds- "You can get it now if you'd like." Gee, thanks for your permission Kevin. I look at Josh and raise my eyebrows.

"Let's get it now." Josh answers me.

As we head toward the bakery, I look longingly down the other aisles. I just want to shop leisurely with an opportunity to think about my purchases and joke with Josh about trying new things. This kind of sucks.

As we pass an endcap of frozen food, I snag a bag of meatballs and some frozen mandarian orange chicken. Josh looks amused. Kevin looks annoyed. I'm thinking about hitting him. Kevin. Not Josh.

In the bakery department I grab some bagels and bread as we try to find something to take with us to Andy's.

"Scones or Coffee cake?" Josh asks me.

"The Cinnamon Streusel Coffee cake is really good. But those scones look good too."

Kevin rolls his eyes. Is punching a secret service agent a crime? I don't think Josh has noticed any of this. Kevin is sort of behind him. I don't think Josh can see his face.

"Get them both." I tell Josh. Take that Kevin.

"Are we done?" Josh asks.

Normally, when we shop he asks me every few minutes in a teasing way. It's kind of fun. This is the first he's asked me today and I think he's serious. I look at the cart. I don't know. I didn't shop off my list. I know I didn't get everything I want but hopefully I got a enough to get us through until we figure out how this is going to work. One thing I do know is that I'm never shopping with Kevin again.

When we get home we carry everything into the kitchen and I start to put stuff away. I guess it's good that we were able to bring everything in from the car in one trip or Kevin probably would have blown a gasket.

I pull out my list and start crossing things off as I put them away. At least I'll know what we still need, even though I have no idea how we are going to get it.

"Hey. You're pretty quiet over there." Josh is leaning against the counter studying me.

"That was awful."

I look up at him and he seems kind of perplexed. Maybe for him it wasn't any worse than normal. Well that thought makes me feel even worse. I know he doesn't love shopping but at least I thought he liked shopping with me.

I finish putting everything away then I wash my hands and grab some freezer bags. I end up with 4 bags with two chicken breast in each and put them in the freezer. Then put the remaining 2 pieces in the refrigerator for tonight's dinner. Then I wash my hands and start on the ground beef.

"Is there something I can do to help?" Josh offers.

"Nope."

I divide the hamburger into what I guess is probably 1 pound packages.

"You seem kind of upset."

Ya think?! I think to myself. I don't want to fight about this. I just want to finish this task and try to forget about the shopping. I put 3 packages of burger in the freezer and save one for tomorrow.

Once I'm done I wash my hands again.

"I'm going to go lay down for a little while. Okay?" Josh looks surprised.

"Of course." He walks up to me and kisses my forehead.

I toe off my shoes and lay down on our bed and close my eyes. I kind of want to scream. Hopefully a nap will help.

A few minutes later the bed sags a little, and then Josh covers me with my fuzzy blanket. He smooths my head and whispers "I love you."


	15. Chapter 15

I'm almost through the stack of briefing memos that I brought home when Donna finally wakes up. I glance at the clock. She slept for almost three hours! I wonder if she's feeling okay.

"Hey..." she says rubbing her eyes. "You been in here the whole time?"

"Yes. I just like being near you. This is a good place to read."

She smiles at me.

"How're you feeling?"

I bet she's hungry. We didn't end up making anything for lunch when we got home. I'm kicking myself for not ordering lunch while we were still at the office instead of trying to power through and get home quicker.

"mmmm, I'm okay." She sighs a little. She still looks kind of sleepy as she gets up to go to the bathroom.

At least she seems like she's in a better mood. She was upset before her nap. I'm still not exactly sure why.

When she comes back from the bathroom, I decide to ask. If she is upset I'd like to talk about it. I set the briefing memo on the nightstand and pat the bed next to me. She smiles, climbs in, snuggles under my arm and puts her head on my chest. This is my favorite position in the whole world.

Maybe I'll start with an easier question and work up to the asking if she's mad at me.

"So, are you hungry?"

"Yeah, I guess. But it's kind of late for lunch now. Should we just go ahead and make the chicken?"

"We could make the chicken now. Then we could go out for dessert later."

"Really?" She sounds excited. Then she frowns, "Are you sure _Kevin_ will let us?"

Oh! It sounds like it's Kevin she's mad at.

"Kevin is here to help us stay safe, but he doesn't run our life."

"It sure seemed that way at the store. He kept giving me the evil eye like he just wanted to get out of there. We've got to shop! I don't want to eat take-out all the time."

"I'll have Kevin removed from our detail."

"Oh. I'm not trying to get him fired." She's so tender-hearted. Even when she's mad at someone she doesn't like to retaliate. That's probably worked in my benefit quite a bit over the years. But she's still kind of mad at him.

"It just felt like he ruined one of the things I like to do with you. But I know you hate shopping. Maybe I should just go on my own so there aren't as many agents involved."

NO. Absolutely not. The solution to this isn't taking away some of her protection. I hate that idea.

"I actually don't hate shopping with you. I like spending whatever time I can with you and it's kind of fun to watch you contemplate your purchases and your running commentary and trivia about everything you see is pretty fun too."

I thought I might be in trouble for the last part but she actually laughs a little.

"I was thinking about it while you slept and I have a couple ideas. First, let's try Amazon for whatever we can, you know paper products, bathroom supplies, whatever."

"Okay. I guess that could work. There are some things that I am going to need soon. They have fast shipping right?"

"Yes. For grocery shopping, even though I don't hate shopping with you, maybe we should consider hiring someone to do it."

She wrinkles her nose. She barely tolerates the cleaning service. She'd just rather do things herself. The thing is our lives are going to get busier. For as much time as we spend in the office, I'd really rather have someone else do the chores at home. Hopefully she'll understand this.

"I know right now it doesn't seem like we are super busy but it's going to ramp up. It might be nice to have someone else keeping our refrigerator and cupboard stocked. That way we can spend more time at home, cooking and you know, _other things._ "

"I might still want to go to the store sometimes."

"That's fine. But if it really is just running in for a couple things I think it won't be so stressful for any of us."

"Okay. I guess we can try it."

"I'll call the cleaning service and see if we can add a personal shopper."

I wrap my arms a little more tightly around her and kiss the top of her head. This is nice. I could just stay like this forever. Donna hugs me a little tighter and gives a happy sigh. It doesn't seem like she wants to move either.

We sit contentedly for about 20 minutes. I kind of marvel at myself. I guess the reason I couldn't sit still for long before is that I didn't have a good enough reason.

Finally, I shift a little so I can look down at her. I'm wondering if she fell asleep again. She looks back up at me smiling softly. She's not asleep but she's close. If I let her fall back asleep now, she's probably not going to sleep well tonight.

"So, how would you feel if we save the chicken for another day and just go out to dinner?"

"Date night?" She sits up and grins at me. I think this idea is a winner.

"Where should we go?"

"Hmmm." She taps her finger on her lip, giving serious consideration to the question. Donna's funny about date night. It's not like we've had a ton of them so she wants each one to be extra special, but she doesn't want to eat out too often. She really likes being at home.

"I don't really feel like dressing up, do you?"

"Whatever you want is fine with me." I really don't care. I love seeing her in jeans and a sweater but I love seeing her dressed up.

"Old Ebbitt or Hawk 'n' Dove or Iota?" She finally lists her top three choices.

I don't want to go to Arlington. That's where the last email came from. But I don't want to remind Donna of that either.

"We haven't been on a date to Old Ebbitt since we got married."

"We never really went on a date to Old Ebbitt before we got married." She quips back.

"Ah, but I wanted to. Every time I ate there I thought about how much fun it would be with you sitting with me going on and on about the decor."

She smacks my arm playfully but grins at me. "I bet a few of my dates there wished they were with someone who'd just shut up already about whether or not Teddy Roosevelt shot that antelope head mounted over the bar."

This is going to be fun.

"I'll tell the detail that we are going out."

I walk to the front door and open it. Kevin looks surprised.

"Mrs. Lyman and I are going out to dinner. Should I call for seating first? Is there anything I need to tell them?"

We probably should have covered this in our meeting with Ron. All he'd said was to give them as much notice of our plans as possible.

"Where are you going?"

"Old Ebbit."

"Just tell them you have a secret service detail. They'll know how to handle it. We'll do a quick sweep once we arrive."

"Okay."

I wonder if Donna has the number memorized or in her phone? She made reservations for me there fairly often. But I want to take care of these details.

I've just opened my laptop to look up the number, when Donna comes out of the bedroom. She looks a lot more awake. Her eyes are sparkling and she's wearing lip gloss. I think she's really looking forward to this.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm just looking up the phone number so I can call."

She smiles even brighter. I'm glad I'm doing this myself. It was fun having her help me in the office today but I don't want her to think I've slipped back into thinking that she's my assistant.

She sits down to watch me.

"Old Ebbit Grill, this is Casey, how can I help you?"

"This is Joshua Lyman. I'd like a table for two as soon as possible. Oh and I'll have a secret service detail with me."

"Certainly, Mr. Lyman. I can seat you whenever you arrive. Do you have an estimated time?"

Donna looks ready to go.

"Twenty minutes?"

"Great, we'll be ready for you."

Well that was easier than I expected. I wonder if it was my name or the detail or some combination. I wonder if Donna was always able to get reservations for me that easily. I hang up and smile at Donna.

"My man." She gets up and plops herself in my lap and gives me a kiss. "That was hot."

"Hey, keep this up and we won't end up using that reservation."

She pouts a little just for show but slides off my lap. I still need to get my shoes on then we can get out of here.

When we arrive at the restaurant, the secret service takes us through the back. We've certainly entered and exited through the kitchen plenty of times in plenty of places in the last year, but not on a date. I'm not quite sure how I feel about it. I'd like to walk through the front door and have everyone see me with Donna.

From the kitchen, the hostess leads us to the Cabinet Room downstairs. Susan follows the hostess and Kevin follows us. Once we are down, there I see we are not the only ones with a detail.

Nancy McNally and her husband are seated in the far corner at a table with two other couples. I give her a small nod and wave. That should be enough for politeness. Hopefully her friends are not politicians. I'd like to enjoy a nice meal with Donna without having to work the room.

The hostess seats us in the opposite corner. Kevin and Susan take their positions a little bit away. It seems obvious that they are familiar with this room.

Donna is looking around the room drinking everything in.

"I've never been down here before! This is really amazing."

Right away the waiter arrives. This level of service is almost too quick. We haven't had any time to consider the menu.

"Sir, Ma'am, can I get you something to drink?"

Luckily, I know what I like.

"I'll have a New Belgium Pale Ale- bottle please."

Donna is scanning the wine list. Should she be drinking? She could be pregnant, but if she is we wouldn't really know for another week or so. I'm not sure whether or not I should say anything. It's not really fair to ask her not to have a glass of wine, when we don't really even know. Maybe I should do some research into this.

"I'll have the Coastal Estates Riesling."

The waiter starts to leave but I stop him. "Can you bring us the Farm House Cheese Sampler right away too?"

Donna looks a little surprised. Maybe I was presumptuous? It seems like something she'd like.

"Have you had it before?" I ask.

"No. I've always wanted to try it."

Oh yeah, girl on a budget. And if two drinks means a Gomer can put his hands on you, what does a cheese platter mean? I'm really glad she never found out.

She's really studying the menu. One of the things I love about her is how much effort she puts into every decision. Finally, I ask her "Do you know what you are going to get for dinner?"

"I'm having a hard time deciding between the Pork Chop and the Crab Cake. What are you getting?"

After all these years, I know what she's hoping. She's hoping that I'll order the Crab Cake so she can get the Pork Chop and then steal part of my Crab Cake. I'm totally on to her.

"I'm getting a strip steak, well done."

She wrinkles her nose, but doesn't criticize my choice.

"But I was thinking about getting a crab cake as an appetizer."

Her eyes light up but she still protests. "But you already ordered cheese."

"We skipped lunch. I think we can get both."

"Okay" She agrees happily.

Once the waiter has taken our order Donna goes back to examining the room.

"Those paintings are by Robin Hill."

"How do you know that?"

"I read it in a book. He was born in Brisbane, Australia. After he moved to Washington, he painted complete sets of American birds. Over 200 paintings. They are in the Morris Museum of Art in Augusta, Georgia."

"You're such a nerd. I love you so much."

She grins at me. I'm really glad she takes that as a compliment. Not a lot of women do.

"Do you know what that's called? The painting that spans 3 panels like that." She tilts her head toward the far wall.

"Triptych." I answer.

She raises one eyebrow at me and whispers "nerd."

"Touché!" God. She's amazing.


	16. Chapter 16

"Wow."

I'm staring at the ceiling with what I'm sure is a goofy grin on my face. Making love on Sunday morning is quite possibly my favorite thing to do.

Josh is laying next to me not trying to hide his satisfied smirk. He's really good at that and he knows it. About this, I have no desire to keep his ego in check. I roll towards him and prop my head on my hand so I can stare at him. I think I could get lost in his eyes. I trace the scar on his chest without thinking, and his eyes get even smokier.

"How long will it take to drive out to Andy's?"

He sighs.

"About 30 minutes."

I glance over at the clock to see how much time we have.

"No, no. Don't look." He begs but it's too late.

"We don't want to be late, babe. Shower?"

He grins, then. Sunday morning showers are pretty high on his list of "nice" things. Mine too.

I'm smiling again while I blow dry my hair. Then the first cramp hits. Damn. Well it _is_ the 28th. I'm not going to let this ruin today. I pop a couple Midol and throw the bottle in my purse.

I can't wait to see Andy and the twins. I really hope Toby is there too. I haven't seen him in so long. He was at the funeral, but I didn't get talk to him then. I think it might have been before the convention.

When I walk out to the kitchen, Josh is putting the scones on a glass serving tray and putting plastic wrap over them. I grin to myself. I've domesticated Josh Lyman in less than three months.

"Are we taking credit for those?"

"God, no. I think everyone would be more likely to eat them if they know we didn't make them."

I raise an eyebrow at him and give him an "I can't believe you just said that look." He quickly realizes his mistake and tries to back-track.

"Not that we're bad cooks. We'll you're not a bad cook. But scones seem kind of hard to make. We haven't done any baking, except for those brownies and those were pretty good. If you want to take credit for these, I've totally got your back."

That was kind of fun to watch him squirm. Just like the good ol' days. He looks up and catches my smirk and realizes that he's been had.

"Oh."

He get's that look in his eyes and I know what's coming next. I look for an escape route as he moves toward me. I flee toward the bedroom but he's caught me, his fingers finding my ribs as he whispers "so naughty" in my ear. His tickling is driving me towards the bed and we fall on it together. If we didn't need to be out the door in 10 minutes, I know how this would end up.

"I give, I give. I'm sorry, Josh!"

We're both laughing, just enjoying being together. Finally, he stops tickling and wraps his arms around me.

"I love you so much." He says. "I'm so happy to do life with you."

"Me too." I give him a soft kiss. Sometimes I wish we didn't ever have to leave the house but I do really want to see the Wyatt-Zeiglers.

On the trip out to Takoma Park, Josh is having hard time keeping his hands to himself. This is the longest trip we've taken in the town car and Josh quickly realized the benefit of neither of us having to drive.

" _JOSH!_ " I say again, as his hand travels up my inner thigh. Thank god I'm wearing jeans.

"God, I wish you were wearing a skirt."

I give him a look. "We are not making love in the back of this car."

"Well, if you were wearing a skirt. . ."

"We still wouldn't be making love in the back of this car."

"Oh." He looks really disappointed. "Okay."

His puppy dog eyes always get to me.

"Maybe we can make out _a little_ on the way home."

He grins and I roll my eyes. He got me. Payback I guess.

When we get to Andy's we have to wait a few minutes while the detail clears her house. I sort of assumed that since she's a Congresswoman we could just go right in but I guess not. Makes me wonder, if someone with a detail visited us, would their detail sweep our apartment?

Finally, we are allowed to get out of the car and go inside. Andy greets us at the door and shows us in. Steve takes a position outside the front door.

"Well, hmm," Andy says- "I can't decide if that is reassuring or mildly disturbing."

"I know the feeling." I tell her as I hand her the scones. As we head toward the kitchen, I see Toby leaning against a doorway.

"Toby!" I run over to him and hug him. He laughs and returns the hug.

"Donna Moss, I've missed you."

"Donna Moss Lyman." Josh interjects with a grin.

"Maz el tov. Really. Glad you finally figured it out."

"Thanks, man." Josh says taking my hand and tugging me away from Toby and putting his arm around me possessively. I think that little display was totally subconscious but there always has been a little brotherly rivalry between them. Josh told me that the last bickering match that they had during the campaign Toby had even used the word "fratricidal." And while in context it wasn't mean to be a compliment, Josh was touched that Toby seemed to acknowledge that they were like brothers.

"Food's ready if you are." Andy says from the kitchen. Huck and Molly come running past Toby and I notice that it's some sort of playroom behind him. It looks like a toy store and a craft store exploded in the same place.

"Wash your hands." Toby tells them as they go by.

"How old are they now?" Josh asks.

"Almost four." Toby says with pride. Wow. Four years went by fast. We all have vivid memories of the night they were born and the people they are named for.

After a moment of silence, Huck and Molly run back through the hallway into the kitchen. Andy has all the food out on the kitchen table.

"I thought we could make our plates here then eat in the dining room. When the kids are done we'll be able to watch them in the playroom from there."

"Coffee? Mimosa?" Andy offers, while Toby starts making plates of food for the kids. It's kind of funny to see him cutting the fruit into miniscule pieces. But then I notice Josh watching him intently, like he's taking notes in his head, and that makes me want to weep. Damn mood swings. I gratefully take the Mimosa and finish half of it in one gulp.

"Um, need something stronger there, Donna?" Toby asks as I notice three sets of adult eyes watching me closely.

"No. I'm good." I demure.

I pick up a plate and take a piece of broccoli quiche, an orange cranberry scone and a couple scoops of fruit.

Josh takes a bagel and lox. I still don't understand how a man that likes burnt burgers will eat fish on a bagel. He also takes a decent size scoop of a cheesy hashbrown casserole.

I shoot him a look and he smiles sheepishly then takes a small scoop of fruit.

Toby chortles at him. "I thought she managed you pretty well before, but that was something."

"Happy wife, happy life." Josh retorts with a shrug. Andy grins at me.

We all head into the dining room. Toby sets the twins plates on the table then they each get a kid situtated into their booster seats. Josh watches in fascination.

"So what's new with you?" Josh asks Toby. Andy and I look at him like he's nuts, but Toby grins. I guess he's tired of being handled with kid gloves.

"Well turns out my previous engagement fell through."

"Yeah, I heard. I'm really happy for you, man. So what now?"

"I'm considering several offers."

"Simon and Schuster?" Josh wonders.

"I don't know. I think they might be expecting some sort of tell all. I wouldn't do that. I have no secrets to share."

I'm not surprised to hear that. I know all the senior staff had book offers over the years. Heck, I even had a few after the Codel. I suspect that someday Josh will write a memoir, but that's not the same thing.

"I've had a few public speaking offers. And I'm thinking about teaching."

"Really?" Josh seems intrigued by that. "Where?"

"A few schools have reached out. Columbia, Wheaton, Berkley."

"I think you're a great teacher, Toby. I'd like to take a class with you." I really would. If he ends up teaching locally, I think I might just try to fit it into my schedule.

"Are you guys done?" Toby asks Molly and Huck, who nod their heads. They've been really quiet through out lunch. Andy gets up and gets a wash cloth and wipes the kids down before setting them free in the playroom.

"More Coffee, Josh? Another Mimosa, Donna?" She asks as she picks up their plates.

"Sure." We both respond.

"Daddy, play with us!" Huck shouts. Toby smiles and gets up. Josh follows him into the playroom.

"What should we play?"

Molly hands him a box and Toby grins evilly at Josh.

The four of them sit around a little table. Josh and Toby's knees stick up ridiculously as they perch on the little chairs.

Andy walks back in with the drinks, setting Josh's coffee next to me. There's really no room for it on the little table.

"How is married life treating you?" Andy asks me as she sits back down to finish her food.

"Really good. I mean, it's sort of an adjustment, but we're just so _happy_. Sometimes I feel like I should pinch myself. But honestly, Andy, if this is a dream, I don't want to wake up. It's even better than I imagined."

Andy smiles at me and I feel a little bad. Her happily ever after didn't really work out. This town is so hard on marriages. I'm going to protect mine with everything I have.

All of a sudden, Molly cheers and I see Josh put something on his wrist.

"What are they playing?" I ask Andy.

"Pretty, Pretty Princess. You spin the dial and move around the board trying to land on pieces of jewelry. The first person to get all their pieces and the crown wins."

The group cheers again as Toby puts a ring on.

"You have a camera, right Andy?"

"Oh yeah."

We watch them playing for a few more minutes then Andy looks at me cautiously. "Josh is so good with Huck and Molly. I hope the two of you have kids someday."

"Josh talks about it a lot. I think he's more ready than I am. We're not trying, but we're not preventing."

"So. . . ." Andy knows that it can take a while, and she knows it can be a sensitive topic, but she's still pretty curious.

"This wasn't our month." I should have known when I was ready to take Kevin's head off at the grocery store yesterday. My monthly visitor was right on time this morning.

"We tried for a really long time. In fact, I was kind of obsessive about it. If you ever need to talk, just let me know."

"Thanks Andy. I don't think either of us is feeling anxious about it yet. I was actually relieved we didn't get pregnant on our honeymoon. My cycle was kind of off from the election craziness and I really wasn't thinking about it. I would have really hated it if people thought we got married because I got pregnant. This way that's not really going to be an issue."

Thirty minutes later Huck is declared the winner. Josh comes over and takes a drink of his cold coffee and grimaces.

"Okay kids, naptime." Andy announces. "Josh, there's more coffee in the kitchen. Help yourself if you'd like. We'll be back down in a few minutes."

Andy and Toby each take a twin and lead them up the stairs.

"So," Josh says, "what were you and Andy talking about?"

"We were talking about how good you look in plastic jewelry." I tease him.

"Hey, I almost won. But I got stuck with the black ring."


	17. Chapter 17

I take Andy up on her offer and head to the kitchen for a fresh cup of coffee. Donna follows me out there. She's eyeing a chocolate muffin like it might hold the secrets to the universe.

"Do you want to split it with me?" She asks. I don't really, but if I say no she probably won't eat it herself, and it looks like she really, really wants it.

"Sure." I'll do anything for her.

"This is _sooooo_ good." Donna moans after she swallows the first bite of the muffin. She quickly pops another bite into her mouth and smiles at me. I think I'll hold off eating my half of the muffin. Something tells me she might end up wanting it after all.

I take my coffee and walk over to the window to look at the back yard. There's a swing set, flowers and a white picket fence. I smirk to myself. A few years ago I would have teased Toby without mercy about the fence. Could it be anymore trite? But now, I see the possibilities. Someday I'd like to live in a house like this with Donna and our kids. She comes up and wraps her arms around me from behind.

"Whatcha thinking about?" She asks softly.

"I'm thinking about how I almost missed the chance to do this," I say turning and giving her a kiss. "And how very glad I am that I didn't."

Toby and Andy join us a minute later. They look really good doing this parenting thing together. I wonder if there is still hope for them, especially now that Toby doesn't have jail hanging over his head.

"Why don't we head to the living room?" Andy suggests.

But Donna has another idea. "You and Toby go ahead. I'll help Andy put this food away first."

Toby and I both shrug and I follow him over to the living room. We sit there quietly for a minute until I break the ice.

"So, uh, thanks for all your help during the campaign, _Bob_. I'm not sure I ever said that."

"Well, it's not like you could publically acknowledge me."

"No, but still, I want to make sure that you know. And um, I'm sorry I didn't talk to you about running Santos earlier. We would've been a good team."

"Josh, I couldn't have left the White House. I couldn't have left CJ on her own. And we did talk about Santos. I didn't believe in him. I thought he was a quitter. I didn't think he had what it took. No one else could have got him elected, Josh, no one. It was all you."

That's pretty high praise from Toby. I take a moment to revel in it. But my ego isn't quite what it used to be. I'm a lot more in tune with reality these days.

"Thanks for saying it, but I didn't do it on my own. As a candidate Matt Santos drove me a little crazy at times but it was his vision that got him elected. And it took a team of people, including you. So thank you."

"So, this is the grown-up version of Josh Lyman?"

"Yeah, maybe. . . . Sometimes."

"It works for you."

A minute later, Andy and Donna join us and the heart to heart portion of today is over. Donna gives me a wink. I'm pretty sure there was a female conspiracy to make that happen but I'm glad they did. Toby and I have always had an odd relationship but it's definitely not one I want to let go. After all, he's family.

Donna slides in next to me on the couch and burrows into my side. I automatic drape my arm around her so she can get comfortable. By the time she's settled Toby is actually smiling at us.

"What?" Donna asks. I'm amazed at how quickly she's been able to transition from not showing affection in front of others to this.

"Nothing. This is my over the moon face."

Being a Dad has definitely changed his over the moon face. He really does seem more prone to happiness these days. I've seen him smile more today than I have in the entire time I've known him. Maybe it's from the having the weight of the world off him.

When Jed Bartlet asked me what I thought about giving Toby a pardon, I'd told him the truth. I don't believe that Toby leaked the story. I think he's covering for someone. If Toby had leaked it just to save the Astronauts, he'd have no reason not to cooperate and take a plea deal. In fact, he had two really good reasons to get whatever deal he could. I was glad President Bartlet didn't ask me who I thought the leak might have been. I think we both had the same suspicion but neither of us wanted to say it out loud. We didn't talk about it again and I didn't know what his decision was until the day of the Inauguration.

I'll never ask Toby for the real story, just like I'll never tell him that he has Abbey Bartlet to thank for his freedom. She never did let Jed leave any of us in the doghouse for very long.

"So . . . . Professor Zeigler?" Donna tests the title.

"Yeah. What do you think?"

"I'd like to take a class with you. I'm sure a lot of people would. Are you leaning toward any particular school?"

Donna's comment has me thinking. That's twice now that she's said she'd like to take a class. I always wondered why she didn't go back for a degree. If she'd told me that she wanted to, I could have found a way to made time for her to do it. If this is something she wants to do now, I want to encourage her, but I don't want her to ever think that she's not good enough without it.

Toby's still talking to Donna about school choices. "Well, not Berkley. That's too far from the kids. I don't want to be more than a couple hours away, tops."

Andy smiles at him, clearly happy with his answer. Watching him play with his kids earlier was pretty amazing. I never imagined he could be so gentle and kind. I would have thought he'd be bored out of his mind playing a silly kid's game. For that matter, I never imagined enjoying such a thing myself. Until recently, I never really spent much time with kids. Now all of a sudden I have a bunch in my life and I've found out that I really like them. Donna's nieces and nephews have completely accepted me into their family. Miranda and Peter call me Tio. I hope that some day Huck and Molly will consider me an uncle too.

Andy brings the conversation back around to work. I don't really mind. It's pretty much inevitable in a group like ours.

"So, how are your confirmations going? I know the house confirmed some of the under-secretaries this week. Any idea when we are going to get Baker and Vinick?"

"Both are still in Senate Committee right now. I think we've got the votes to move them both out of committee and on to the floor this week. I'm trying to keep them on the same track. I've got the votes for Vinick as long as we get Baker. Obviously, most Republicans will vote for him along with the Blue Dogs. Most of the more liberal Democrats are willing but only if they get something in return. Baker's the harder sell. Too many Republicans are hoping for another Bob Russell."

"Are you really going to be able to get Baker?" Toby asks me bluntly.

"Of course, I am. It's the first thing the President has asked me to do. I'm going to get it done. I'm close and the undecideds will easily put us over. I'm really only concerned on how quickly we can get it done, not whether or not we can get it done."

All of a sudden, Andy and Toby cock their head simultaneously.

"The kids are awake." Andy announces. Wow. I didn't hear anything. Apparently having a kid gives you better hearing. I noticed this at Christmas. Julie and Finn could hear Marco from a mile a way.

"Do you have to go get them?"

Toby laughs a little at me. "No. They can get out of bed themselves. They'll probably play in their room for a little while before they come down here."

I guess that's one benefit of twins. Built in playmate. Lifelong friend. I study Donna for a minute. I wonder if we could handle two at once?

The room lapses into silence for a minute, then Andy finally says-

"So did you happen to bring any wedding pictures with you? I only saw the one in the Post."

Donna grins and jumps up. "Yes! I've got the album in my bag."

I didn't even think about that. Most of our friends saw the photos right away, but Toby was still a little too radio-active then. I'm glad Donna thinks about things like this. I'm sure she's glad Andy asked. She'd never have brought them out if they didn't.

Donna hands the book to Andy, then stands over her shoulder to give the commentary while Andy looks at it. Toby even comes over and looks at it over Andy's other shoulder.

"Those are really great pictures. I'm so happy for you two." Andy says as she closes the book.

"Can I just tell you as someone on the outside of the White House, that yes, there were rumors floating around about the two of you but there were plenty of people, on both sides of the aisle, that had your back. And there are even more people that gave a cheer when they saw the Post announcement. You two might just have the greatest DC love story of all time."

Donna gets teary at Andy's little speech and I'm really touched too. I don't even know what to say. But then Huck and Molly come barreling down the stairs and I'm saved from saying anything at all.

"Can we have a snack?" Huck hollers.

"Of course!" Toby responds.

"Well, I think we need to head home." I give Andy a hug. "Thanks."

"You guys are always welcome out here." She tells me.

Donna gives Toby another hug.

"Don't be a stranger." Toby tells her. And she promises that we won't.

Once we're in the car she closes her eyes for a minute. She looks tired.

"You need a nap too?" I ask her.

"I thought you wanted to make out on the way home."

"I'm happy just to hold you."

She smiles at me and unbuckles her seatbelt. That makes me frown. This isn't the President's motorcade. She needs to leave that on. She rolls her eyes at me and slides over. There's another seatbelt in the middle. She puts that on and then leans against me. I wrap my arm around her and kiss the top of her head.

"Good girl."

"Well, that's rare praise from you." She chuckles. You are much more likely to point out when I'm naughty." She may be tired, but she's bringing the sass.

"But I have so much fun with the naughty girl." I tease back. But instead of tickling her, I run my hand along the side of her face gently. After a few seconds, she yawns. Five more minutes and I bet she'll be asleep.

The trip home is silent. From her breathing, I'm pretty sure she's out. We've only been married a couple months but I'm already seeing a pattern here. Snippy, sleepy and hungry, three signs that probably mean we aren't expecting. Really, that's probably a good thing. We have enough changes ahead of us as it is. And I'm loving the life we have right now. But I'm still looking forward to the picket fence future.

As soon as the car stops, Donna sits up and smiles at me. There's still a lot of Sunday left. We have chicken to cook for dinner, then I see a long bath and snuggling in bed while watching a movie. And then tomorrow back to saving the world.

This having a life thing is pretty great.


	18. Chapter 18

"Time to get up, beautiful." I open my eyes and Josh is smiling at me. He gives me a kiss and leaves the room. I get up and head to the shower. Our new routine is working really well. I don't love getting up at 6 but I do love not using an alarm clock and I do love riding into the office with Josh.

While I'm getting dressed, Josh gets my coffee and breakfast ready to go. Josh and I have breakfast in his office while he goes over the daily schedule with Margaret and gets ready for his 7:30 Staff meeting. It's a really nice way to start the day and it lets us figure out if we can have lunch together. My staff knows not to expect me in the office until after the Senior Staff meeting in the Oval.

At 7:30, Sam, Bram, Lou and Edie file into Josh's office. Bram and Edie are bickering.

"I think it's time to put a little pressure on the hill. That's all I'm saying."

"No." Edie responds. "It's too soon. Right now we have to play it cool. The ball's in their court. If nothing happens this week the public will tag them with the delay, but we need to stay out of it."

"What's up?" Josh asks them.

"Bram thinks we need to issue a press release putting pressure on Congress for a quick confirmation of Baker."

I jump in. "Edie's right. Right now we need to let the process work. An average cabinet level confirmation takes 25 days. If we put too much pressure on something to happen faster than that it looks like we have a weak nomination that we are trying to run through quickly in order to hide something. Then the hill comes back at us with a list of candidates that they would quickly confirm and we get stuck with another Bob Russell. Actually it wouldn't surprise me if they tried to stick us with the actual Bob Russell."

Everyone groans. But Josh give me his "I'm so proud of you" Smile. Then he has the last word on the subject.

"We'll continue to work this from behind the scenes. I've got some meetings today. I think we'll get out of committee before the end of the week. But even if not, we hold the course. If we don't have movement by the end of next week- then the DNC or DTripleC will start making a little noise. But the White House will remain calm. Our only statement on confirmations is "President Santos is confident that his nominations will be confirmed in due course."

"Okay, Sam, talk to me about what's on the table for Education Reform."

"Amy expects the house to introduce a bill this week to increase funding for public schools that add more math and science classes. Ernie Gambelli wants the President to make an appearance in New York for the National Education Association. And the National PTA is having it's 110th Anniversary on February 17. They'd like a interview with the First Family for Our Child Magazine."

"Donna?" Everyone looks at me.

"I'll take it to the First Lady. I'm sure she'll do the interview but I don't know if she will let the kids participate."

"This is pretty routine, Donna. Make something happen there. We could use her help." Josh looks frustrated. Did he think I'd just say yes without talking it over with Mrs. Santos?

At 8am we all file into the Oval, President Santos is in a good mood.

"My minions! Everybody have a good weekend?"

Everyone "yes, sirs" him. He smirks. "Would anyone tell me if they didn't?"

We all look around at each other. No probably not. Finally Sam says "Ainsley had us spend the full weekend on wedding planning."

President Santos clasps Sam on the shoulder. "Peace be with you." He intones.

Everyone laughs including Sam. I think it's a good thing Ainsley isn't at this meeting.

"Okay, let's get started." Josh says.

Once the meeting is over, I start to file out with everyone else. I hear the President clear his throat, then Josh says "Hold on, Donna."

I hope he's not going to get on me about not immediately agreeing to the interview. But he just comes up and kisses my cheek.

"I love you. I'll see you later."

Oh yeah. President's rule. Well, I don't want him to kiss me under Presidential decree. I only want him to kiss me when he wants to.

"See you later," I murmur as I leave the Oval.

It's not quite 8:45 when I get to the First Lady's suite. As I open the door I can't help but smile. The room looks lovely. Gail really does nice work.

Karen grins at me from her desk. "It's pretty amazing, isn't it?"

"Good choice." I tell her as I head to my office. We have staff meeting in 15 minutes and I want to add the PTA stuff to the agenda.

When I open my office door, I'm happy to discover that my office is complete as well. The dark paneling is toned down by the large photographs of the rose garden. I have a pale sofa and two matching arm chairs, surrounding a long, low coffee table. On closer inspection, I think this is CJ's old furniture. Josh is using what Leo had before. That's nice. I don't mind having a bit of CJ with me in here. She took a big scary promotion and rocked it too.

I finish the agenda and send it to the printer, then I buzz Karen. "Please be sure to bring the agenda with you to the meeting. I just sent it to the printer."

"No problem. Mrs. Santos just arrived she's on her way in."

I get up and greet Helen at the door.

"Oh Donna! This place looks great." She says as she sweeps in. "Look! You have a couch now."

"Yes, would you like to sit?"

Helen and I sit and grin at each other for a minute.

"Well, this seems a little more real with the office up and running." Helen finally says.

"Yes, and Josh has some things for us."

"Oh yeah? What?"

"Well in a couple weeks there is a National PTA luncheon to celebrate their 110th anniversary. They'd like you to be the key note speaker. This ties right into the education reform platform and still fits your Mom image."

"Okay. I can do that. What about the speech?"

"We'll have someone from the speech writing pool draft something, then we'll tweak it for your style. We may eventually need to consider your own speechwriter but for now this works."

"Okay, what else?"

"The National PTA would like an interview with the First Family this week. They publish a magazine called Our Children. The issue would be released around the same time as the luncheon. They probably want some candid photos of the First Family in the residence, and they'd probably use quotes from the kids as well."

"No. I'm not going to let my kids be interviewed. Matt and I can do a joint interview and they can use that family photo from the Inauguration, but nothing new. The kids are trying to settle into a new school and a new home. They don't need any new press."

"Okay." I'm glad she knows what she wants. I hope she'll eventually agree to some new photos of the kids, but I can respect her desire to give them some time to adjust first.

There's knock on my door. It's 9am. The rest of the staff is ready for our meeting. Karen catches my eye and I tilt my head towards the table. She walks over and starts putting an agenda out. At that, everyone else takes a seat. Helen and I get up and join them.

"Alright everyone, the message of the week from the West Wing is still Education Reform. Our agenda today is to look at what we've got coming up that supports that message and to brainstorm for other ideas."

"Annabeth?"

"Okay. Well, Wednesday morning Mrs. Santos is scheduled to go to the boutique and pick up the donation check for the Feeding Children Initiative from the inauguration gowns. Then we'll drop it off at the Feeding Kids local headquarters. We've been asked if she'd like to fill and deliver backpacks to a local school. You know, each child in the program receives a backpack with staple items and fresh produce on Friday afternoon. For most of those children that's the only food they have for the weekend. We can have the press pool present to get photos, and issue a press release with statistics about how childhood hunger effects education."

"Mrs. Santos, what do you think? Do you want to deliver backpacks on Friday afternoon?"

"Absolutely. Just not to Peter and Miranda's school if there will be press."

"Right."

"Angela, any blog news to report?"

"Do we have the final amount of the donation check?"

I look at my notes. I don't have that information. I look at Annabeth who also shakes her head no.

"I guess not. Karen, can you call the boutique and see if you can get that information as soon as possible."

"Yes, of course."

"Well, once we have it," Angela continues, "I'll create a backpack counter box. It costs about $160 per kid per school year. So we'll figure out how many kids this donation covers and then we'll also have the tally go up based on donations through the website."

"That's not the FLOTUS website, right?"

"Right, it's the Feeding Children Initiative Website. It's completely independent. We just have a link on the FLOTUS blog."

"Ok great." I make a note to talk to Ainsley about this. I just want to make sure that we don't have any legal or ethical problems linking to a charitable website that requests donations. I don't see a problem. But I'm not a lawyer.

"Okay, as far as other upcoming events. Mrs. Santos and I just discussed a speaking engagement on February 17, that she'll accept and she's going to do a related interview. This is for the National PTA and their magazine. Ned, can you rsvp to that and update the computer schedule please?"

"Uh, sure." I'm trying to give him some opportunity to interact and actually have something to do.

"Alright, now for the brainstorming portion of this meeting. I'd like to go around the table and each of us say one place where we'd like the First Lady to make an official visit or give a speech."

"I'll start." Annabeth offers. "I'd like to see the First Lady visit a children's hospital. We could take books and toys and interact with children and parents."

"Good idea. We could probably tie that into Health Insurance Reform. Who's next?"

"I have an idea." Angela says. "I'd like to see the First Lady visit a STEM school and encourage more girls to go into Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics fields."

"I really like that idea." Mrs. Santos' praises Angela. "That definitely ties into Education Reform."

Karen raises her hand. "I really like this Backpack thing. Maybe it could become a regular occurrence? Like once a month?"

"That's a good thought. We'll check it out." I smile at her. I used to raise my hand in meetings too.

We all look at Ned, who has a blank look on his face.

I decide to go next. "I'd like the First Lady to visit schools all around the country, to see first hand what the students need. So that students know someone cares about their school, or at least their area."

"Libraries." Ned blurts out. "She could go to libraries and read to kids."

"Thanks Ned, that is a good thought. Reading is fundamental. That's definitely worth looking at." He looks relieved to have had a good idea. Maybe he just needs some encouragement.

"I'd like to give some tours here at the White House." Helen says. "I'm not sure how to choose the group, but something that fits the message of the week. Can we make that happen?"

"Of course. What a great idea. I'll coordinate with the Office of the Head Usher."

"Okay everybody, good meeting. Let's get to it."

Everyone stands up and leaves the room except for Helen. Once they are all gone she looks at me.

"Okay what do I do now?"

"Well, the correspondence office was going to start pulling a few letters a week for you to look at. You can decide if you want to respond to any yourself or if you want correspondence to handle all of them. I believe those are in Ned's office. I can also call the Office of the Head Usher and arrange a tour for us. We can get a sense of what happens on the tours and start to work on what you want the First Lady Special Tour to be. We should also try to think of a better name than that!"

Helen laughs. "I'll read some letters while you set up the tour. Just let me know when he's ready for us."

As Helen heads to her office, I sit down at my desk and hit the intercom.

"Karen, please get Curtis Schaefer on the phone for me." While Karen's placing the call, I open my email.

"Head Usher, right?"

"Yes."

"Okay, right away."

I scroll through looking to see if Josh forwarded one from the PTA. The one with no subject line catches my eye. Not again. Maybe I should wait, but I open it.

All it says is "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" I double click the attachment. It's another photo-shopped picture from one of the balls. He's made my dress red again and he's completely erased whoever else was originally in the photo. I hope it wasn't Josh.

The intercom buzzes.

"I have Mr. Schaefer on the line for you."

"Thanks. While I'm talking to him can you get Ron Butterfield on the line. Oh, and you'd better get Josh too."


	19. Chapter 19

I hang up the phone and scrub my head. That was a painful phone call, but I think it was productive. Senator Pierce is on board with Baker for VP and is going to rally the liberals behind Vinick. He finally understands that we need both. And I didn't even have to get drunk to convince him. Although he did say, "What is it with you and bipartisanship?"

As soon as I hang up, Margaret comes in.

"Your 10:30 is here and Donna's office called for you."

"Margaret! Why didn't you get me for Donna?"

"That call with Senator Pierce was pretty intense. I didn't want to interrupt it. Donna's assistant said she didn't think it was an emergency."

"Didn't THINK it was an emergency? Why didn't she KNOW whether or not it was an emergency? Get her on the phone. RIGHT NOW!"

I stand there glaring at Margaret while she dials the phone.

"Hold for Josh Lyman, please."

Margaret holds the phone out to me. "I have Donna's assistant for you."

"I don't want her assistant," I seethe. "I want Donna."

"Right." Margaret speaks back into the phone. "Yeah, is Donna available? Okay I'll let him know."

Margaret hangs up the phone and looks back at me.

"Karen said that Donna and Mrs. Santos left right after Ron Butterfield."

"Cancel my 10:30 or have Sam take it." I say as I race out the door. "I'm going to Ron's office."

I'm practically running toward the basement when I hear Steve behind me.

"I need a location on Bulldog." Oh that's right! I have a tracking device on my wife. I smile to myself. This is good.

"Sir, she and the First Lady are taking a White House tour."

"What?"

"They're with a tour group. They are in the Blue Room right now."

I walk quickly toward the Blue Room. Helen and Donna are at the front of the group near the tour guide listening intently to the history of the room. I don't care. I walk up to the front of the group and grab Donna's arm and pull her aside.

"You're alright?" I ask looking her over from head to toe.

"Yes, Josh." She smiles at me so beautifully, it takes my breath away and I can't help but lean in and kiss her softly on the lips.

"I'm okay. It was just another email."

"You scared me." I say quietly resting my forehead against hers.

I hear a collective sigh, and suddenly remember that we have an audience. Right.

"Come to my office when your tour is finished." I say curtly, but offset my tone by giving her a kiss on the cheek, then quickly walk out the door.

"That was our Chief of Staff, Joshua Lyman." I hear the tour guide say. "He's not normally part of the tour."

On the way back to my office, I'm trying to decide whether or not to fire Margaret. I really want to. But what if she's not impervious? I don't really want her to actually leave. She's really good at her job. I think we just need to come to an understanding. Right. I'll just give her a lecture. I'll fire Karen. I don't care if she thinks she's impervious or not.

As I walk through her area, I say "Margaret. My office. Now."

"Tell me exactly what happened this morning." I say as soon as she's through the door.

"Well, You and Donna got here at 6:53. Not your personal best time but still not bad . . . "  
"Margaret!" I cut her off, while pinching the bridge of my nose. "The phone call. I want to know exactly what was said during the phone call from Donna's assistant."

"Okay." She picks up a pink slip off my desk. "Karen called at 10:08. She said 'Donna would like Josh please.' I said, 'He's on an important call. Does she need him right now?' And then Karen said 'I don't think so, she has some other calls too.' So I said 'okay, I'll have him call her as soon as he's off the phone.' And she said 'that's fine, I'll let Donna know.'"

"So, what you're saying is that after Donna said she wanted to speak to me, you and Karen decided between yourselves that she wasn't as important as Senator Pierce?"

"When you say it like that it sounds bad."

"Ya think?" I give her a glare and she looks contrite.

"Let me be absolutely clear. No one, and I do mean no one, is more important to me than Donna. I don't care if I am in a code-word clearance meeting in the Oval office, if Donna calls for me, you immediately come get me. Is that clear?"

"Yes, sir."

"Okay, what's next?"

"Sam took your 10:30." I roll my eyes. It's 11:15 anyway. "I already rescheduled your 11 and that was it until after lunch because I had blocked out some time for memos."

"Alright. Donna will be here shortly. Send her in as soon as she arrives. Get Karen on the phone for me now."

"No."

"What?" I can't believe she's defying me two minutes after I lectured her.

"No. Karen is Donna's assistant. You have to let Donna decide how to handle this."

"I'm the Chief of Staff."

Margaret gives me a look that puts my ego in check. I wonder if she ever did this to Leo or CJ.

"Yes, I know. Listen to me. If you talk to Karen while you are upset and you do something stupid without consulting Donna, you're going to regret it. And I'm not going to be an accomplice." She looks at me levelly, daring me to defy her. After a minute of me thinking it over, I nod my head. She right.

"Is there anything else you need?"

"No."

"Okay then." Margaret turns to walk out the door.

"Margaret. . . ." She stops and looks back at me. "You're a good assistant. Thanks."

Her mouth quirks up and she nods her head once in agreement.

I'm having a hard time reading this memo, something about snowmobiling. I keep checking my watch every five minutes. How long is that tour? Finally, at 11:45 Margaret opens the door and shows Donna in.

"I'm here for my spanking!" Donna announces gleefully. Margaret's eyebrows shoot up.

"She's kidding!" I hiss at Margaret.

"Right." Margaret says softly as she shuts the door.

Donna's grinning at me unrepentantly as I move toward her. These women are going to be the death of me.

"C'mere please" I beg as I open my arms. She smiles a little more softly at me as she walks into them. I wrap her in a hug and rest my head against hers and just stand there for a few minutes. I can finally feel my blood pressure inching back toward normal.

"Let's sit on the couch." Donna finally breaks the silence.

"Okay."

"Josh , you have to stop hugging me so we can move."

No. I don't think I do have to. It's only a few steps to the couch. I lift her off her feet a little and shuffle over there. Donna starts giggling. When we hit the edge of the couch I sit down and awkwardly pull her on to my lap. I smile to myself. I didn't have to let go.

After a few more minutes of me just holding her, Donna says "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. What the hell happened? I still don't really know what's going on. Just that my wife needed me, my staff blocked me, and Ron Butterfield was involved."

"Well, that sounds highly dramatic. It's not that big of a deal." God. I'm starting to really hate it when she says that.

"What. Happened?" I say shortly.

"When my staff meeting wrapped up around 10, I had a few minutes to check my email. I found another email from my "friend". . ."

"Don't call him that!" I interrupt harshly. She looks a little taken back so I rub her hand gently. "Please, he's not your friend. I know you think I"m over-reacting. I think you're under-reacting. But please, we can agree that he's not your friend, can't we?" I ask her a little desperately.

"Okay. I received another email from 'he who shall not be named.'"

She looks at me intently. "You didn't get the Harry Potter reference. Where's Peter when I need him?"

"What was in the email?" I'm trying to stay calm. Please just tell me before I have a stroke.

"Another picture from the balls. It had been cropped so that it was just me. And my dress was red again. Ron's got them working on figuring out who was cropped out. I think it was a group shot of the women."

"Did the email say anything?"

'Just "where have you been?' Ron thinks it's because I wasn't in the papers or on the news last week at all."

"Why didn't you come get me? And why were you on a tour?"

"I had Karen call Ron and you immediately. You were on an important call. Ron was handling it and I was perfectly safe. Mrs. Santos had a really good idea. She wants to give at least one tour a week to a group that somehow relates to the message of the week. Something that the White House Press Corps can write about. We were on the tour because she doesn't really know enough about the White House to lead a tour right now."

Just then Margaret taps on the door as she's opening it. "Your lunch is here."

The plan had been for me to bring her lunch in her office.

Donna stands up. "Let's go back to my office! It's finished now. I want you to see it."

"Yes. And I'd like a word with Karen."

Donna sits back down. "No."

What is it with women telling me no today? I give her a look.

"No. You can not yell at my assistant."

"Donna. I'm the Chief of Staff. I can yell at whomever I want."

She gives me the same look as Margaret. Damn. These women really have that look down.

"Josh. She didn't do anything wrong. She placed a call. She conveyed the information back to me. If I thought that it was an emergency, I would have had her tell Margaret to interrupt you. Good grief! I could have had Ron Butterfield have your agent drag your ass up to my office if I wanted to!" She grins at the thought of that.

"I don't want our staffs deciding when we get to talk to each other. I told Margaret to put you through no matter what. No one is more important than you."

"Josh. That's not very realistic. Sometimes I just want to chat."

"That's fine. She can put you through and we can chat."

" _JOSH_. Sometimes you will be on a call or in a meeting that is more important than me chatting."

"No I won't."

"YES. You will. Do you want me to just NEVER call to chat because I'm afraid that I'm going to interrupt something really important?"

"No."

"Okay then, we need a better plan. How about when I call just to chat, I'll tell Margaret that I don't want to interrupt you if you are in a meeting or on a call. And for those times she can just have you call me back."

"Okay but today wouldn't have been one of those times."

"Josh, it was being handled."

"NO. You listen to me now. If you want me to agree to this plan, you need to understand, anything related to your health and safety, no matter how insignificant YOU think it is, gets put through immediately. This applies to the children as well. If you are calling to tell me you need to buy some shoes or ask what I want for dinner, I suppose it can wait."

"Okay." She agrees. But then I tilt her chin up so that we are making even better eye contact.

"But if you are feeling down, and you call to chat about your shoes just to hear my voice- that's related to your emotional well-being and it's more important than any other call I'm on." I look into her eyes. God. Does she really understand how valuable she is?

"Do you understand?" I ask a little sternly.

"Yes." She says softly. She looks a little startled at my tone. But I'm not playing around here. I really need her to understand how valuable she is.

"Good. Let's go have lunch in your office. I promise I won't fire your assistant."

"Okay, then I won't fire yours."


	20. Chapter 20

I think it's a good thing we are heading back to my office. It seems like Josh could use a change of scenery. I'm a little shocked at how worked up he got over that last email. Well, to be fair I don't really think it was the email. I really think it was the snafu over him getting the information about the email. It makes me glad that it wasn't my fault. He's not really mad at me.

He'd better not be mean to Karen. I haven't actually told her about the stalker. Maybe if I had she might have been more insistent on Josh taking my call. Come to think of it I don't know if Margaret knows either. That doesn't really seem possible. Margaret knows everything.

When we get to the office we hear voices coming from Annabeth office. Karen sounds upset.

"I think I really screwed up! Margaret just told me that Josh is on his way here and he's pretty upset. What do you think he's going to do?"

"You're probably going to get fired." Ned states with authority. "He's pretty much an egomaniacal jerk that gets off on firing people."

"Really?" Angela says, "he's pretty intense but he seemed nice enough."

"The only thing you really need to know about Josh is that Donna is the most important thing in the world to him. If you do your job at making her life easier, you won't have any issues with him." Annabeth says.

"Oh god. I'm fired for sure," Karen cries.

"What did you do?"

"Donna wanted me to get him earlier, when I called his office his assistant asked if it was important and I said he could call back later."

"Was Donna upset?"

"No, she seemed fine."

"Then why are you worried?"

"Because Margaret said Josh is mad at me!"

I drag Josh down the hall to my office.

"See! She's all upset. She doesn't even know why you're mad! How was she supposed to make Margaret put the call through to you?"

"If she had told Margret it was about the stalker, Margaret would have put the call through."

"I didn't tell Karen about the stalker! None of my staff knows."

"You didn't?! Why not?

"Because I just want to do my job. I don't want people treating me differently. I'm the boss here. I don't want to seem weak."

"Donna, I don't think they'll respect you less because of this. I think it would be good to tell them. At least Karen, so she knows to watch out for phone calls or mail or anything."

"Did you tell Margaret?"

"No, but I assume she knows."

"Why?"

"Because Margaret knows everything."

I just roll my eyes at him. Margaret probably does know but it would have been easier if he'd told her.

"Get the food out. I'm going to get Karen. You're going to be nice to her. I'll tell her about our new phone policy and I'll tell her about the Stalker. I'm not telling the others yet."

"Okay." So much for change of scenery. But at least he's not arguing with me.

I walk back out of my office and see that Karen and Angela are back at their desks.

"Karen, can I see you in my office for a minute." Angela shoots her a sympathetic smile as Karen gets up to join me.

'Did you get some lunch yet?" I ask her.

"No, I wasn't really hungry."

"You can have half of my salad if you like."

"No thanks."

As I open my office door, I tell her- "Nothing to be worried about. You aren't in any trouble."

"Hi Karen." Josh says from the couch. I'm glad to see he's maintaining a pleasant tone. I can tell it's not his genuine smile, but it's better than him being angry with her.

"Come sit down with us." I tell her as I join Josh on the couch, leaving Karen to choose one of the chairs. She perches on the edge of one of them.

"Karen, you are doing a good job. I'm really glad I hired you. I think we make a good team." I see her relax a little but she's still on guard. "I need to tell you something that for right now I want you to keep to yourself, okay?"

"Sure"

"The First Lady already knows, but I don't think the rest of the staff does. I've been receiving strange emails for a few months. The Secret Service is treating it as a stalker."

"Oh my god! Did you get one this morning?" She covers her mouth with her hand.

"Yes."

Karen looks directly at Josh. "I'm _so_ sorry. I would have told Margaret that it was important if I'd known that."

Josh smiles at Karen and it's a little more genuine than earlier. He leans forward as he begins to talk to her.

"I've explained to Margaret that I don't want the two of you deciding what's important and what's not when Donna wants to talk to me. My instructions to my staff are that Donna's calls are put through. Always. But Donna has convinced me that there are times when she won't want to pull me away from what I'm doing. So we've come up with a policy. If Donna asks you to call me you and Margaret are going to assume that it's top priority and get me on the line immediately. But if when she asks to get ahold of me, Donna specifically says that it's not urgent or that she'd like to talk to me at my convenience then you'll still call Margaret right away, but if I'm in a meeting or on the phone, Margaret will let you know that I'll call back."

"Okay. That seems like a good plan." Karen seems relieved. "What about when he calls you?" She asks me.

"Really it's the same. But Josh doesn't usually call just to chat, so most of the time I expect that he'll want to interrupt. And I'm fine with that. So even if I say I'm not to be disturbed, if Josh wants me then you should get me."

"Okay."

"We all have important jobs to do, but I don't want my wife thinking that I don't have time for her. She's the most important thing in the world to me."

Karen seems to melt a little. She doesn't seem so scared of Josh now.

"So what else do I need to know about this stalker situation?" Karen asks "Do they know who it is?"

"No. They don't know who it is. It's only been email so far, but the Secret Service is screening Donna's postal mail. Obviously if you get any unusual phone calls or mail you should tell Donna and call Ron and me immediately."

"Okay." Karen looks at me. " Do you need me for anything else?"

"No. Thanks, Karen. Be sure to take a lunch break soon. I can handle my own calls for an hour."

Once she leaves I give Josh a kiss.

"What was that for?"

"Do I need a reason?"

"No, but you don't usually kiss me at work. So I assume there is a reason."

"Thanks for being nice to her."

"I'm always nice." He grins and I roll my eyes. We both know that's not true.

"Your office is pretty. I'll have to send you some roses."

"You don't need to do that. The Florist's office will put some in here if I ask."

"I like sending you flowers."

I give him another kiss.

"So how does this week look for you?" Josh asks me as we finish eating.

"Well, we've got some Feeding Children Initiative things happening. On Wednesday we are picking up the donation check from the boutique and delivering it to the Feeding Children Initiative local headquarters. Then on Friday, we are packing backpacks and delivering them to a local school."

"You're leaving the building this week?"

"Yes."

"I don't like that idea. Has Ron approved this?"

"Of course the Secret Service is involved in Mrs. Santos' travel. The Wednesday trip was planned last week. This morning I filled Ron in on the Friday event. Ron is coordinating with the Feeding Children people regarding which school we'll go to."

"I meant did Ron say it was okay for you to go?"

"Ron doesn't approve my travel."

"I'm not sure _I_ approve." Josh says firmly.

" _YOU_ don't approve my travel either." Josh looks taken back at my vehemence. I need to dial it back a bit. I don't want to fight about this.

"Listen. My job is to travel with the First Lady. I'm not going to let a few vague emails stop me from doing my job. The only way Ron would stop me is if he decided that being near me was a danger to the First Lady. He hasn't brought that up yet. Until he does, I'm going to keep doing exactly what I should be doing."

"What if I told you not to go?"

I take a deep breath and remind myself that he's asking a question. He didn't just give me an order. I look into his eyes. There is a mixture of hurt and worry and something else I can't quite identify in them.

"Josh, I know you're worried that something could happen to me. I know that feeling because I live with it whenever you are away from me too. But these are our jobs. If you don't let me do mine, I'm going to have a hard time letting you do yours. I think the day you tell me not to go, is the day we should seriously talk about moving out of this City and picking different careers."

"So if I told you not to go?" He asks me again. I'm not sure I understand what he's asking.

"Are you asking if I'd obey you? Like if you ordered me not to go?" Could that really be what he means? I didn't use the word obey in my wedding vows.

"I guess, but that's not how I'd say it."

"I'm confused, Josh."

"I mean "obey" sounds so archaic. I'm not looking for blind obedience to random orders. But yeah, if we talked about it and at the end of the discussion I said "don't go" would that be enough?"

I hesitate. That's a scary thought. Am I willing to let him have the final say? Would he let me? Maybe he would- he's been saying I'm the most important thing all day. And he's been reminding me that he'd put me over this job ever since we got married.

"It kind of sounds like you want to be the boss of me."  
"Yeah. But I want you to be the boss of me too."

I don't know how I feel. I trust Josh. But is he asking me to give up all the independence I've worked for? Does it matter that he seems to be offering me whatever it is that he's asking me to give him? This seems really important to him. Are we having some sort of weird theory meets reality kind of moment? I still haven't actually answered his question.

"So, if I told you not to go with the First Lady on Wednesday, would you stay here?"

"Yes." I say softly, praying that he doesn't ask me to prove it.

His smile starts slowly then takes over his whole face. He really didn't know whether I'd put him over this job. I would. But I hope he understands that it he makes me prove it, I'm going to demand equal measure.

"So if I said- Josh, it's time to be done. Quit your job. What would you do?"

"I'd hand in my resignation effective immediately." He didn't hesitate at all. He's already thought about what he meant when he said I'm more important than the job. That's good, I guess, but I don't want to force him to quit any more than I want him to force me to stay behind on Wednesday.

"Josh, are you telling me not to go with the First Lady on Wednesday?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying. But I think maybe we should talk about it."

"Okay, but you really heard what I said? You can't wrap me in bubble wrap and try to keep me out of danger by not letting me do my job and think that I'll let you keep doing yours."

"I didn't ask for your trust to have a weapon to use against you. I'm not going to suddenly put my foot down and start issuing orders. I just needed to know you'd let me tell you what to do if I thought I needed to. And I'm not being some caveman. I'm giving the same trust to you. If you tell me to do something. I'll do what you say. It means something to trust your partner enough to let them make a decision for you. But it's not like we're going to start bossing each other around all of a sudden."

He looks so earnest, but I'm still not sure I completely understand what he means. I think I've given him sort of reassurance that I'll let him protect me by being bossy sometimes. And it sound like he's given me the same thing. The last time someone wanted total control over my life it didn't go so well for me, but I trust Josh, and that doesn't seem like what he wants anyway. This whole conversation was a little too intense. I really need to lighten the mood.

"I don't know. I might want to boss you around a little more now that I know the full extent of my powers." I grin at him evilly.

"Oh god. I've created a monster."

"I think I'll start by making you eat vegetables."


	21. Chapter 21

I'm sitting here looking at a huge pile of vegetables. This was totally predictable. Last night she made hamburgers, so I know she's not mad at me. But instead of potatoes she served them with salad and green beans. She wasn't available to join me for lunch today but she had Margaret bring me a salad and vegetable soup. I ate it all then had Margaret email Donna and report back that I was a member of the clean plate club. Tonight it's chicken stir-fry, so I'm looking at broccoli, carrots, snap-peas, cauliflower and peppers. It's a good thing I make breakfast or I'd probably be drinking Kale Smoothies this week!

I'm pretty sure Donna is trying to prove a point with all these veggies. She thinks she's forcing me to do something I don't want to do and that the experience might persuade me not to force her to do things she doesn't want to do. But it isn't really going to work for several reasons.

First of all, if she stopped to think about it she'd realize I've been eating a lot healthier ever since we got married. I'm already older than her and I've had reconstructive heart surgery. I want to do whatever I can to prolong my life. I have a really good reason to live. And I'm hoping for a few more good reasons in the future. So she's not really forcing me to do something I don't want to do.

Second, she's actually proving my point, if I was making a bad choice by not eating healthy it wouldn't be fair to either of us. Her stepping and making me do the right thing, something that actually benefits us both, is exactly what I was talking about the other day. Sometimes it's really helpful to have someone you love and trust tell you what the right thing to do is. Of course, I'm assuming that she's making me eat these vegetables because she loves me and wants me to live longer- not because she's trying to punish me for something.

Third, she's forgetting that I kind of like it when she runs my life. I always have.

And finally, she doesn't seem to understand that I don't really have any desire to make her do something she doesn't want to do.

I've given our conversation in her office yesterday a lot of thought over the last 24 hours or so and I've come to the conclusion that she doesn't really understand what I wanted. It's not a question of power, it's a question of trust. I think she might be afraid that I'm going to turn into some domineering husband that wants her to be barefoot and pregnant and making him dinner. I'm not sure why she thinks that. I don't think I've ever given any indication that I would want that kind of relationship. In fact just the opposite. I'm so proud of what she's already accomplished and I think she's destined for even greater things. If we need a stay at home parent, I might just be the man for the job.

I also don't know if she understands that the conversation was about a concept. It wasn't really just about tomorrow's photo-op. But still the fact that she said yes, she'd skip it if I told her to makes me really happy. Not because it gives me power, but because it shows she trusts me. Frankly, I'm amazed that she'd said yes, even though she seems afraid of the concept of letting someone else make decisions.

And I'm not sure that she knows that I do understand that decisions have ramifications. Specifically, that if I prohibited her from going on trips with the First Lady it would basically be like stopping her from doing her job. I do know that and it's not what I want at all. And I don't know if she knows that I get that if I take away her chance to work in the White House that she's not going to want to stay in this town anymore. I know that she'd want me to quit my job too. Not in retaliation, but because if its too dangerous for one of us, it's probably too dangerous for both of us. It just wouldn't be right for me to demand that she stop taking the risk, when there are risks in my job too. If I ever decided that it was too dangerous for her to do this job, I'd quit mine without being told, and I'd move us some place safe. I get what's at stake here.

I just want us to talk about it. I want to talk about the risks and the safety precautions being taken. I want to make sure she knows that it would kill me if something happened to her. And I do want to know that she'd put me before the job. That if I just couldn't stand the thought of her going on a trip that she wouldn't go.

And she's right- this time isn't that time. There have been no specific threats. We have no evidence that the stalker is following her or will know where she'll be. And she'll be with the First Lady and a maximum security detail the whole time. This is as safe as it gets.

Of course, a little part of me still does want to wrap her in bubble wrap. But I know that's not possible.

Now, I just have to tell her all of this. I clear my throat a little and start.

When I've finished, Donna reaches across the table and takes my hand.

"It's kind of scary. Loving you as much as I do. I know you'd never hurt me intentionally. I don't think you want me home barefoot and pregnant. I'm glad you understand that if we let fear hold us back from doing our jobs, then we need to rethink whether we should be doing these jobs at all. I promise I'll be extremely careful tomorrow. I'll follow all the protocols and I won't take any unnecessary risks."

"I love you so much."

She smiles at me and stands up. "I'll take care of the dishes while you go read some memos."

It's really nice of her to offer but I don't want to shove all the domestic stuff onto her just because my job is a little more demanding. I'm managing the load of reading by bringing stuff home and reading some of it at night and reading some of it in the morning before work while she's still sleeping. But I'm not going to let it consume every minute of our home life.

"No, thanks. How about I rinse and you load? Or I can do both and you can decide what to wear tomorrow."

"Let's do them together, then I can pick out my clothes while you read."

"Okay." I stand up and grab my plate and glass and take it to the sink. Donna follows me with her stuff. It only takes a few minutes doing it together and there is just something about that feels so right. I never expected this . . . contentment from household chores. Maybe the difference is because now it feels like a home.

Once we are done I grab the memos from my backpack and take them into the bedroom. Donna is looking through the closet trying to decide what to wear. I know whatever she picks will look fabulous, but my stomach turns at the thought of her picture in the paper.

"Can I make one request?"

"Sure."

"Don't wear anything red."

"It goes without saying, babe."

Later, we're laying in bed together, reading. I'm almost through the stack of briefing memos that I brought home and she's reading a biography of Jacqueline Kennedy and telling me trivia.

"Hey, did you know that Jackie O started horseback riding at age one?"

"No, I didn't know that. Sounds kind of crazy. You know a one year old didn't ask for lessons. That's the parents trying to turn their kid into some sort of superstar."

"Yeah. . . . Hey, did you know that they had a kindergarten in the White House for Caroline?"

"Homeschool?"

"Not really. 12 other children attended with her."

"Interesting."

She's quiet for a few minutes then she says. "This is what Helen was talking about. This is the kind of First Lady she wants to be." And then Donna reads from the book-

"While she had a deep sense of obligation to her Country, her first priorities were to be a good wife to her husband and mother to her children. She told a reporter that 'if you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well matters very much.'"

I stop and put the memo down. Then I turn so that I'm facing Donna. "That's what I mean. But not just for the First Lady. For each of us. If I do a good job at this Chief of Staff position but I bungle my marriage and future children, what's the point?"

I run my hand down her arm and then intertwine our fingers and bring our hands up to my mouth so I can kiss her knuckles.

She smiles at me. "You are doing amazing. And I do feel the same way."

Then she looks down at our hands.

"Hey, you're wearing your japamala." She looks from the beads on my wrist back up to my eyes. "You haven't worn them in a while. Are you really that nervous about me going with Helen tomorrow?"

"Yes, and no. I wear them when I need something tangible to help me stay calm. I don't need them nearly as often when you are around. Since you'll be out of the building tomorrow, I thought it might be a good idea to wear them."

"Do you need to call Stanley?"

"No. He's the one who gave me the beads all those years ago. I know what he'd say. He'd want me to acknowledge my fear and give it the appropriate amount of respect. No more. No less. That's what I'm doing."

She looks carefully at me. "You know, if does get to be too much, even if it's irrational- I'd quit if you needed me to for your mental health. And when I say I'd want you to quit too. I don't mean that I'd make you quit your job as a punishment for making me quit mine. I mean if it gets to that point then I think it would be best for us to leave this place and start over somewhere else."

"I know."

"I don't think I explained it very well yesterday. Honestly I wasn't really sure I understood what you meant either, because it seemed like you were talking about smaller decisions but now I think I know. I think you meant even on a small decision, if it meant that much to the other person, we'd give them that right. But really it's not about that, is it? Really it's about the idea that if something means that much to you- enough to want to make the final decision on it, that I trust you to do the right thing. When it comes to these jobs, either one of us has the right to call it quits for both of us. To say I can't do this anymore. And to know that the other person is going to go along with it. Right?"

"Right." I say softly. God. I love her so much. I'd never do anything to hurt her. I only want what's best for her.

"The last time a man wanted to make decisions for me, he wanted me to give up everything for him. And, he didn't want it just in concept. He really wanted me to do it. And he wasn't willing to do the same for me. I know you're not that man. And I know that's not what you are asking. But even though I know that, it's still kind of hard. I'm sorry if it seems like I don't trust you as much as you trust me."

"Oh god, Donna, you have nothing to apologize for! I love you so much. I'm not going to let you down. I promise."

And if I ever met Dr. Freeride face to face, God help him.


	22. Chapter 22

Josh whispering in my ear wakes me up.

"You are the most amazing woman I've ever met. I'm so proud of you. You are destined for greatness. You are the best wife. I know you'll be an amazing Mom. The White House is lucky to have you. I'm so lucky to have you. You are an awesome lover. You are smart. You are beautiful. You are kind. You are generous. You could be President someday."

It's a constant litany, delivered very slowly, very softly while he's spooned up against me from behind with his arm wrapped around my waist. I glance at the window. It's still dark outside. I don't think he meant to wake me up.

"I love you." He whispers in my ear, then he kisses the side of my neck and gently slides out of bed. Once I hear him leave the room, I roll over and look at the clock. 5 am. Huh. I wonder if he does that every morning.

I lay there awhile, listening to the sound of the treadmill and CNN, thinking that I am the luckiest woman in the world because Josh Lyman loves me best.

I must have drifted back to sleep because at 6am on the dot, I get my normal good morning kiss and greeting.

"Time to wake up, Sunshine!"

I give him a big grin. God, I love him.

"God, I love you." He says giving me another long kiss.

"Alright. No more distractions. I'm sure you don't want to be late today." He says as he leaves the bedroom to go do some more reading.

I get up and head toward the bathroom.

Once I'm ready, I join Josh in the kitchen. He's got breakfast packed up ready to go. I'm really glad he put himself in charge of breakfast.

"How do I look?" I ask him spinning slowly. I'm wearing a black pantsuit with a cobalt blue silk blouse.

"Gorgeous. Very professional."

"Do you think it's okay that I'm wearing pants? Maybe I should wear a skirt?"

"Pants are fine. Besides it's cold. You look great." He glances at his watch, then looks back up at me. "You have time to change if you want to, but I think you look good."

"Okay. Let's go."

He gets my coat and holds it out for me. Once I have it on, he reaches for his own.

"Do you have a scarf? gloves?"

"Josh, all the photo-ops are inside. We'll only be outside for a few minutes when we get out of the car and walk in the building. I might not even wear my coat."

He frowns a little but doesn't say anything. God. He's so cute when he worries. I give him a light kiss on the lips. "I'll wear my coat if it makes you happy."

"Thanks. And promise . . ."

"I'll wear my seatbelt." I interrupt him, then give him another kiss. I link my arm in his and move him towards the door.

"Good morning, Phil! Good Morning, Jackie!" I greet them enthusiastically. I'm so excited about the field trip today. It feels like the first "real" thing we've done since taking office.

"Backpack and Bulldog coming down." Phil says into his wrist, while Jackie smiles at me. I hope she's looking forward to the day too.

"Jackie, are you going with Donna today?" Josh questions her.

"Yes, sir."

"What protocols are in place?" He asks once we're in the car.

"This is a standard operation, sir. FLOTUS will have a full detail, plus I'll be on Donna. The advance team will arrive at each location thirty minutes before we do and will conduct a full sweep, including the dogs. We won't arrive until the venue is cleared. Roads will be blocked prior to our arrival and we'll do a diamond formation in and out of the buildings. FLOTUS has advised no rope line for either venue. Given Donna's circumstances we are doubling the perimeter, and we'll set up video surveillance from the SUV to record observers for future reference."

I give his hand a squeeze. "It's going to be fine."

When we arrive at Josh's office, I see Margaret jot down the time.

"How'd we do?" I ask her.

"6:42. New PR." She smiles at me and follows me into the office. Josh hangs our coats up in his closet, while I put the bagels and coffee on the table. Margaret sits down with her notes. She runs through the list while Josh and I eat.

"What about lunch?" Margaret asks. Josh looks at me.

"I'm not sure what time we'll be back. We're picking up the check at the boutique around 10:30. That's in Falls Church. We've allotted 30 minutes. Then we have to go to the Capital Area Food Bank up by Catholic University. That'll take about 20 minutes or so. Then we'll spend another 30 minutes there. So I don't know I guess we could be back here by 12:30. But then we probably need to do some debriefing and such. I think maybe you'd better plan lunch without me."

"What would you like to eat?" Margaret ask him. Josh looks at me again. I just smile at him. I'm done teasing him about the vegetables.

"I'll have a grilled chicken salad. Ranch dressing on the side." He grins at me. Okay then. No complaints here.

"Alright then." Margaret says as she leaves the office.

"Do you need me for Senior Staff today? I kind of want to get back to my office and make sure we're all ready to go."

I stand up and start to clear the table off.

"No, we're good. But C'mere a minute." He's standing over by his desk with his arms open, so I walk into them and lay my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arms around me and just holds me for a minute. I'll give him as long as he needs.

Eventually he sighs and let's go, then he kisses my cheek.

"Please, be safe." He says a bit desperately. God, I love him so much. I hate the thought that this stresses him out. But really, even if I didn't have this job, I could die in a car accident. There are no guarantees, you just have to make the best of it.

"I will. I love you."

"Love you too." He says as I walk out the door.

Jackie and I get just a few steps down the hall when Josh comes running after me.

"Donna!" Oh no. Has he cracked? Are we done working at the White House? I turn around.

"You forgot your coat. You promised you'd wear it." He hands it to me a little sheepishly. But I give him a big grin.

"Thank you, honey."

Once we get out of the West Wing, I turn to Jackie and smile. "We made it."

"Not yet. Once you're in the motorcade on the way, maybe then."

"True."

"Did you know there's a pool? I thought I made some money back there."

"What?!"

"Yeah, the agents have a pool going on whether he let's you go or not."

"How does that work?"

"Whoever gets closest to time that the call comes into the office pulling your detail from the trip. I had 7:30 this morning."

"Does anyone have me going on the trip?"

Jackie looks a little embarrassed. "If you end up going all the money gets donated to the Feeding Children Initiative."

"Good. Because that's what's going to happen. I know Josh Lyman. He's going to worry like crazy, but he's not going to stop me."

Jackie smiles at me. "Well, since it's past 7:30, I hope you're right."

We're both laughing as we walk into the office.

"Good morning, Karen" I stop to chat while Jackie sweeps my office, then takes her position.

"Good morning, Donna." She returns.

"What time do you have in the pool?"

She blushes. "8:45." I just shake my head and walk into my office. I sit down to check my email, praying there is nothing in it. I'll confess, I contemplated not looking at it just in case, but that wouldn't be keeping my word to Josh about taking every precaution. If there's something there we need to know about it so we can deal with it.

I'm relieved to find nothing unusual. It looks like "he who shall not be named" is back to once a week emails.

At 9 o'clock the First Lady and the rest of the staff walk in.

"So, are you still going?" Annabeth asks.

"Of course!" Then it hits me. "Et tu?- What time did you have?"

"9 o'clock." Annabeth replies. I look around the room with my eye brow raised.

"9:15" Angela says.

"9:30" Ned says

"9:45" Helen says.

"Ma'am!" She totally deserves that for betting against me. Helen just raises an eyebrow back.

"I am so winning this bet." I tell them.

We spend the next forty-five minutes reviewing the plans. Annabeth has the Press in hand. There is a press van available for anyone who wants to join the First Lady for an unspecified photo opportunity. No interviews will be given. A press release will be issued after the fact. We expect the van to be full.

The Boutique was advised that the First Lady's office would come to pick up the check between 9:30-11:30, we asked Sandra to keep it quiet. We don't really expect that she will. Even if she does, some bystander is going to see the Secret Service sweep the building and there will probably be a crowd waiting to see who arrives by the time we get there. It's just the way this town is- gossip spreads like wildfire and leaks are common.

Karen, Angela and Ned are staying here. I needed Karen to cover the office and there is no reason for her to go. I wasn't sure if Mrs. Santos would bring Ned. It doesn't really seem like a thing for a guy, but he is her personal assistant. She quickly informed me that, no, she didn't want him along. Once Annabeth found out the other two were staying behind she thought it was best not to bring Angela, even though she had bought her dress from the Boutique. Angela didn't seem to mind. She's pretty happy being left to her computer.

At 9:45, I stand up and smile at the First Lady. "Shall we get our coats?"

"You're not out of the woods yet." Helen smirks at me.

"We'll see." I respond.

As we leave the office, our detail has already grown from two agents to four. When we arrive at the portico, my heart drops. Josh is standing there waiting for me. I feel guilty. I should be happy to see him. But I'm disappointed that I'm not going to get to go on an adventure with Helen and Annabeth.

"Shit." Helen says under her breath. "I was just kidding. I'll have Matt talk to him."

"No." I reply sadly. "If Josh really doesn't want me to go, I don't want to use the President to force his hand. That's not the kind of marriage I want."

"Hold on!" We hear the President's voice boom, as he arrives with his detail.

"We just wanted to say goodbye to our ladies." He gives Helen a long kiss good bye. Good thing the Press pool is already in the van.

Josh grins at me, then kisses my cheek.

"Josh, Josh, you can do better than that." The President admonishes him.

Josh rolls his eyes, but he pulls me tight against him and whispers in my ear. "I love you more than life itself. Please be safe." Then he gives me a very sweet kiss on my lips.

He watches while Helen, Annabeth and I climb into the limo. When the door shuts, Helen yells out "Woo Hoo! Best $20 I ever donated."

"It was $20 bucks a slot?" Dang. Josh and I have _got_ to start getting in on these pools.

"While we're out we should pick up a bottle of wine for the ride back." Helen suggests. Annabeth laughs. I think she's joking, but I'm not always 100% sure. Helen has a very dry wit.

It only takes 20 minutes to get to the Boutique. Sure enough, there is a small crowd outside. Local law enforcement and the Secret Service have them well contained. I hope they are being nice about it. We want good press. This is exactly the kind of excitement we need to be able to get other Boutiques to join the cause and more Washington elite to think about tying their purchasing power into something altruistic.

Sandra is thrilled to see us again. She chats with us as the Press takes photos of her handing over the check to the First Lady.

"I've already seen an uptick in my Prom Gown business since the Inauguration. Several young ladies want to make a statement at Prom while wearing the same gown as you ladies. I've had inquiry calls from several states away. I'm sure I'll have another donation check for your cause in a few months."

"Wonderful!" Mrs. Santos exclaims. "We appreciate all you've done for all of us. We love your store and we appreciate your support for the Feeding Children Initiative at FeedingAmerica dot org." Helen though having prepared remarks was a little weird but I assured her it's always better to know what you are going to say.

"Donna! Do we have time to shop for dresses while we are here? We've got a state dinner coming up and I have nothing to wear!" Now that the prepared remarks are concluded Helen is browsing through the racks, while the cameras click.

"Come on! Try something on with me." She randomly holds a dress up to me. I hate to say no to her, but we really don't have enough time, and honestly, we want to try to get a different boutique on board for the next round of dresses. I catch her eye and shake my head slightly.

Mrs. Santos makes a big show of looking at her watch, then announces. "Too many dresses, not enough time. Thank you again. We'll be back again some other time."

As the Secret Service gets us out the door, Helen whines- "Donna! There's a shoe store!" But the agents hustle us into the waiting car. When we drive past a Starbucks, she practically begs- "Can we make a Starbucks run? Come on you know you want a Mocha Frappuccino too. The White House coffee is good but it's just not the same."

She's so excited to get out of the White House that it's like girls gone wild, First Lady edition.

I'm pleasantly surprised that there is no one waiting outside the Capital Area Food Bank. The Director there seems to understand that it is very beneficial to have a good working relationship with the White House. He must not have told anyone. And since it's a warehouse in an industrial area, there don't seem to be any bystanders that could have just happened to see the Secret Service. This gives me a good feeling about Friday.

Annabeth and I insist that we not be in the picture as the First Lady presents the check to the Director, but she wants us in the group shot with all of the employees. We walk around the Food Bank, thanking everyone for their work. Helen is very personable and you can tell that she really believes in this cause. What a great first outing.

But when we get back in the motorcade Helen says, "Come on, Donna, you know you want Starbucks."


	23. Chapter 23

I've been pacing in my office for the last hour, fingering my beads, while trying to read memos. I should have tried to find a few more pick-up meetings to distract myself. I look at my watch again. The motorcade should be here soon. I had to restraint myself from waiting by the portico, but I don't want to hover. It's important for Donna to do her job professionally and not feel like I'm watching her every move.

"The motorcade is back." Margaret pokes her head in and grins at me. She had asked me if I was going to meet it earlier. When I said 'no, just tell me when it arrives,' she had nodded her head once in that quirky way. It's funny, but I get an odd sense of pride when I manage to please Margaret.

About 5 minutes later my blackberry buzzes.

[Back in my office safe & sound. Love you.]

I felt a weight lift off my chest and I smile as I read it. I'm sure they are de-briefing right now. It was really sweet of her to send me a message.

"What are you smiling about, J?"

Amy's voice is like a bucket of cold water. It's not that I don't like her, it's just that the appeal is completely gone. I really try to be neutral for the sake of our working relationship, but sometimes she just grates on my nerves.

"Donna's back in the building."

Amy raises and eyebrow and shakes her head. "So? What's the big deal? They had a couple local events, it's not like they were half-way around the world. Sometimes it's like you're a love sick puppy."

"It's not that. She's been getting some harassing emails. I almost didn't let her go."

"Didn't let her go?! You're not her father, J! She's a grown woman. YOU don't get to decide where she goes. Oh my god. Could you BE any more sexist?"

"Hey! It's not sexist! I want to tell everyone I care about what to do! Especially when it comes to their safety!"

"That's true. Just last week he made me put on my seatbelt." Sam defends me as he walks into the room. He's a good wingman. I don't even know how much of that conversation he heard.

Amy shakes her head again. "Well thank your lucky stars you never tried to boss me around when we were together."

She really doesn't get it. That's one of the reasons it would never have worked between us. She made 100% of her own decisions and didn't care how they effected our relationship. She called me a hit and run but she wasn't willing to sacrifice any of her independence to be part of a couple either. Truth is we just weren't meant to be, not in any universe where Donna existed.

"Well, shall we get started on this meeting?" Sam asks. Good idea, Sam.

Once Amy and Sam are out of my office, I've got a 30 minute block of time to read memos. I really want to get through as many as I can. I'd like to have less reading to do at home tonight. I just need some time to hold Donna, and watch a movie, or _something_.

The day drags on. I'm trying to get enthusiastic about my work but it feels a little mundane right now. Reading lots of memos, having lots of meetings about education, monitoring Kazakhstan. The Chief of Staff position is a lot more supervisory than I'm used to. It's probably better for my blood pressure than being in the middle of the fight the way I used to be, but it's a lot less exciting.

When Matt's ready to head to the residence, I'm ready to go too. Margaret hands me a stack of memos. A week and a half into this gig and she's already got a system in place. She gives me the most important memos to read during the day and saves the least sensitive to take home. So far it's working out pretty well even though there is a never ending stream of them.

I head up to Donna's office. I'm a little surprised she wasn't waiting for me with Margaret. Most of the time she ends up in my office before 6 if I don't have a meeting. I guess being gone from her office half a day put her a little behind.

When I get there, I find it empty except that Susan is standing outside Donna's office. I tap lightly as I open the door just in case she's on the phone. She smiles brightly as I walk it. That definitely makes my day better.

"Hey, what do you think about a Woman's Leadership Breakfast? The First Lady could host a breakfast for all the women in Congress. She could give a speech about "women's issues" and urge bi-partisan cooperation."

I see she's got a couple of notepads going. One has a list of all the female members of congress. The other has a list of women's issues: healthcare, education, childcare, reproductive rights, fair pay. It looks like she's working on a chart of where each of the Congresswomen stand on each issue. At least she's enthusiastic about her job. I hope her talents are not wasted in the First Lady's office. This is a good place for her to start, but I see much bigger things in her future.

"It's a great idea! Do you need to stay here to work on it or can we talk about it more at home?"

"Is it after 6 already?" She looks at the clock. "Wow. I guess I lost track of time. Yeah, let's go home."

As she powers down her computer, I head to the closet to get her coat. This leadership breakfast is a good idea. I hope Mrs. Santos is on board. If she's not, I'll ask Donna to work with Lou and Amy on it anyway and we'll put it on the President's schedule.

Donna chatters about her ideas the whole way home. I just sit and listen. She has great ideas and has already thought through how to implement them. I'm so impressed with her. I knew she was ready for more, but I'll be honest I didn't expect to be this good at it this fast.

As soon as we're through the door and out of the agents' sights. I launch myself at her, taking her face in my hands and kissing her intensely. Finally I let go of her face and my hands move to unbutton her coat. She looks a little dazed. I thread my hand through her hair and cup the back of her head pulling her in for another long kiss. After a few minutes I pause to get her coat the rest of the way off. Then I shrug out of mine.

"Wow." She stutters out "what's gotten into you?"

"I'm incredibly turned on by your brain right now. I think it's time to christen the desk."

"Really?" She grins happily.

"Really!" I advance on her again, my mouth finding hers, my hands on her shoulders as as I back her up toward the desk.

Quite a bit later she's draped over me on the couch. Her head is on my chest and I'm running my hand up and down her spine. There's a trail of clothes between us and the desk.

"Sex on the desk didn't really live up to the fantasy, did it?" I ask her.

"No, iIm glad you suggested moving to the couch. . . . . I think I'm going to have a bruise."

I sit up a little so I can examine her. Sure enough there is a dark red mark on the back of her thigh. She must have caught the corner while I was trying to find a good position. I run my hand over it gently, feeling a little sick to my stomach. I hate the thought of our love-making leaving marks on her.

"I'm sorry."

She looks into my eyes and smiles at me. "Nothing to be sorry for. Couch sex was pretty amazing. But I'm going to use my very attractive brain and figure out how to make desk sex work for us sometime." She tilts her a head little and waits to see if I object. I guess I'm willing to give it another try if she is. Marriage is about teamwork.

"Okay." I go back to running my hand along her side. I could lay here like this all night. But she starts to move and I know this isn't going to last.

She gets up and walks along the trail of clothes, bending at the waist to pick each item up and giving me a very nice view of her ass while she's doing it. I think I'm being teased. She looks back over shoulder.

"Hey, you could make yourself useful too, you know." She bends over again and I groan.

"Oh yeah? Well certain parts of my body are feeling ready to be useful again." I smirk at her.

She walks back toward me, the armful of clothing blocking my view of some of my favorite parts of her body.

"I meant, why don't you order dinner while I put these away."

"Don't feel like cooking tonight?"

"I thought we could find something else to do instead." Her gaze drifts down to that part of my anatomy that wants to feel useful. Well, that'll get me off the couch. I head into the kitchen.

"Chinese or Pizza?" I ask as I open the fridge to make sure we have some beer.

"You pick."

This day just keeps getting better. I flip the phone open to order. Once I'm done I head into the bedroom. Donna is laying provocatively on the bed waiting for me.

"A Large Cheese Pizza and Large Garden Salad should be here in 20 minutes." I say moving to join her.

"Then you'd better use your time wisely." She teases.

Challenge accepted. I crawl up the bed toward her and whisper in her ear. "I bet I can make you scream my name by then." I take her earlobe between my teeth and suck gently. I see her shiver. Yeah, I'm going to win this bet.

Eighteen minutes later she's laying there with a satisfied smile. She lets out a deep sigh and turns to look at me. "Well, that's one bet I don't mind losing."

"You haven't heard what the penalty for losing is yet." I warn her.

"Oh." She bites her lip in a way she knows drives me wild. "Are you going to punish me?" She asks softly, pouting and blinking innocently at me. She loves this game.

"Yes, I am." I tell her sternly and watch her eyes get very smoky.

The doorbell rings, and I grin at her. "You have to get dressed and get the Pizza."


	24. Chapter 24

"Are the papers here?" I ask Josh as we sit down to breakfast in his office.

"Margaret!" He bellows.

"I'm right here." She says from behind him, handing me the Washington Post.

"First Lady Visits Food Bank- Front Page Baby!" I can't help but grinning as I wave the paper at him.

I start to read the article aloud- "The First Lady delivered a $10,000 check to the Capital Area Food Bank on Wednesday. The money will support the Feeding Kids initiative which pairs critical food assistance with focused education on the role of fresh fruits and vegetables in a healthy, active lifestyle. 1 in 5 children are at risk of hunger. In addition to the children served through partner agencies and mobile pantries, the Capital Area Food Bank distributes nutritious food items directly into the hands of local students through programs tailored to meet the needs of families with children. The First Lady encouraged donations to the Initiative as part of the Inauguration ceremonies. continued on A16."

That's probably the back page. I flip the section over. "Wow. It's almost the whole page." There are several photos.  
"There's good coverage for the Bout..." My heart stops and I go silent.  
"Hey- your face is frozen in an odd way." Josh start to banter, as he gets up to come look over my shoulder.

There are 3 large photos. A group shot from the Food Bank. The First Lady receiving the check at the Boutique, and a picture of Helen and I shopping. Helen's holding a red dress up in front of me.

Oh my god. I had one job. Follow the rules. Don't do anything risky. Be safe.

I look at Josh to gauge his reaction. Is he going to be mad at me?

"What are you thinking?" He asks rubbing his hand over the back of my head. It's very comforting. He doesn't seem mad.

"I don't even remember that being taken. That whole shopping part- it lasted like two minutes. I don't remember the dress or anything. I'm so sorry, Josh."

"Why are you apologizing to me?"

"I guess I wasn't careful enough."

"No, baby, this isn't your fault. It just happened."  
"Maybe he won't see it?"

But we both know that's not likely.

"Margaret! Get Ron on the phone for me."

When the call comes through Josh leaves it on speaker.

"Hey Ron, Did you see the paper?"

"Yeah. We have someone monitoring Donna's email right now."

"What should we do?"

"Carry on as normal, Josh. If he makes contact today, it will give us more information and we'll go from there."

"Okay."

"Do you want to hang out in my office all day?" Josh whispers in my ear as he's kissing my cheek after Senior Staff. "I can have Margaret go get some bubble wrap from supply."

He's being very sweet about this. I give him an extra hug. "No, but thanks for the offer. The waiting is a little nerve racking, but we do have jobs to do, you know."

"Okay. Please let me know as soon as you hear something."

I head up to my office. Kathy walks a step behind me. I'm starting to get used to it.

When I get to the office, Mrs. Santos is already there. She's actually sitting in the reception area waiting for me.

"OH DONNA! I am so sorry! I didn't think about it. I feel terrible."

Angela and Karen look started at her outburst. Ned and Annabeth both rush out of their offices. Well, I think we just added an agenda item to today's staff meeting.

I look at the four of them. "All of you, in my office. We'll be there in a minute."

Once the others are out of hear-shot, I turn to Helen. She seems very upset.

"I'm so sorry, Donna. I wasn't thinking. I was just having some fun. It felt so good to be out of the White House. And now I've put you in danger. I'm a terrible friend."

"No, Helen. You're a wonderful friend. I had a great time yesterday. I felt the same way. I didn't even look at the dress you held up, I bet you didn't either."

"No, I just grabbed the one right in front of me."

"Exactly. And actually, it might be a good thing."

"Really? How do you figure?"

"Well, the way the emails have been so far, Ron can't do much about them. They aren't actually a threat. If they were actually threatening he could get the FBI involved. So if this escalates the situation, they might actually be able to track him down."

"Wow. I don't think you better share that thought with Josh."

"Yeah. You're probably right about that."

We head into my office together and everyone turns to look at us. Once we are both seated, I look around the table. I don't know why it's hard to tell people about this.

"Alright everyone. I'm sorry I don't have an agenda for us to go over today. But I guess I need to start by telling you all something. For the last several months I've been receiving strange emails. Typically one per week. Prior to the Inauguration each email was the same. It just said "I hope you wear a red dress." After the Inauguration, I received two more emails, which have included doctored photos. As of now the emails are not considered threatening, but the Secret Service does consider them of a stalking nature."

"Oh my." Annabeth exclaims softly. I see the pieces click in her head, then she looks between me and Helen trying to decide how to word her question. "Have you had a response to this morning's photos?"

"Not that I know of. The Secret Service is monitoring my email today. I haven't looked yet."

"Are you still going to help stuff Backpacks on Friday?" Karen asks looking concerned.

"I don't know yet." I answer her honestly. "I would like to go but it will depend on whether the Secret Service determines that it's safe."

"Maybe I should go." Ned offers shyly. "You know, it might be good to have a man around."

We all look at him incredulously. If the Secret Service doesn't think it's safe, having Ned along isn't going to change their minds. Still it was a sweet offer.

"For now let's assume I'll be going. Even if I can't go, the rest of you should. Karen, Angela, Ned, I would like all of you to go if you are willing to help. We'll get an temp in here to handle phones."

Everyone nods their head in agreement.

"Annabeth, the article in the Washington Post was fantastic. That's the only one I saw. Did anyone else pick it up?"

"All the DC papers had spreads. AP and Reuters had small articles that were picked up nationwide. Both of those used the photo of the First Lady delivering the check to the food bank. The Northern Virginia Daily did a spotlight on the Boutique in the local news section."

"Outstanding. I bet we'll get even better coverage of the food packing and delivering the Backpacks tomorrow. I think we should have news coverage of the First Lady delivering the Backpacks to the schools."

"Are you sure?" Karen asks. I look around the table. Everyone looks wary.

"Of course I'm sure. Good press is like capital in this town."

"To get Television coverage we'll have to give advance notice of where we'll be." Annabeth notes.

"I know. But how much notice? Ask around today, would you? Off-the-record, hypothetically, if the First Lady had a surprise, news worthy event how much notice does their team need? I mean, they all have breaking news teams, they scramble news vans all the time. Maybe the answer is that we leak it 5-10 minutes before we arrive."

"What do you think Mrs. Santos?" Josh is right. The names do make a difference, because right now I want approval of my plan from the First Lady, not my friend Helen.

"Yes. I think TV coverage would be good. Let's leak it after we are done packing the Backpacks. Let the outlets treat it like a news event instead of a planned event. Donna, make sure the advance team knows."

"Okay. Anyone else have anything for this morning?"

'I do." Helen hands each of us a small white envelope with our names on them in careful printing. Mine says Tia Donna & Tio Josh. I smile at Helen.

"Should we open them now?"

"Please."

Inside the envelope is a flat card with a picture of a container of popcorn and the words "You're Invited to a Movie Night." The blanks have been filled in using the same careful printing. Date & Time: Friday February 2, 7pm, Location: The White House Movie Theater, Hosted by: Miranda & Peter Santos.

"How fun!" Annabeth announces in her perky voice.

"Josh and I wouldn't miss it." I tell Helen.

"I, um, have a date." Angela says shyly.

"Oh really? Do tell." Helen says, looking at her. Angela blushes. "Oh okay," Helen says "You're off the hook. Unless you want to bring him?"

"No, thanks, I don't think we're quite ready for that yet." Angela quickly responds. Smart girl. Matt's already pretty nosy about his staff's personal life, and while he's not quite as paternal as Bartlet was, there's something about Presidential power that lends itself to giving people the third degree. But if she keeps dating him, sooner or later, she's going to have to bring him around.

Helen smiles at Ned and Karen. "How about the two of you? Can you make it? Miranda wants the movie to be a surprise but I can assure you that it's PG rated, and the popcorn will be fresh."

"Sure, I'll be there." Karen agrees. I'll have to talk to her later and make sure she knows that it is optional. She's entitled to a life outside of this place.

Ned nods too. "Of course."

"Great." Helen says standing up. Everyone else gets up as well.

After everyone else leaves my office, Helen looks over at my computer. "Go on, check your email."

"You don't have to stay."

"Hey, that's what friends are for."

I'm not sure why we all think this is going to be bad. But we all just seem to have a sense, that this situation is about to get more intense. As I boot up my computer, I tease Helen a little.

"Are you sure you can't tell me what movie they'll be showing?"

"I'm sure. I've been sworn to secrecy."

"Well, I don't know if Josh will admit it, but he actually wants to finish watching Night at the Museum. We didn't get to see the end of it last week."

"Oh, I'm sure we can arrange that. Peter really liked the movie too. I'm sure he'd love to have Tio Josh over to watch it again."

Helen has moved over to stand right behind me as I scroll through my email. I look through the inbox twice, then I open the spam folder. Then I look up at Helen and grin. Nothing. All that worry for nothing.

Just then my intercom buzzes. "Ron Butterfield on line one."


	25. Chapter 25

Margaret slips into the oval office and hands me a folded note.

[Ron Butterfield would like to meet with you and Donna at 11:30.]

"That's fine." I tell her and she slips back out.

General Alexander is pushing the President for more troops on the ground again. President Santos is listening intently. I know he wants to avoid all out war in Central Asia, but he has great respect for the Joint Chiefs. I've got to get Vinick confirmed. President Santos needs him in the room.

After another half hour I break into the conversation. This is still the same spiel from last week.

"General. You still haven't explained how more troops on the ground is going to help the process toward negotiating a peaceful resolution."

The General gives me a look of disdain. "A show of strength will discourage any further escalation."

"That's not necessarily synonymous with encouraging withdrawal of troops by the other parties, though, is it?"

He just glares at me, then turns to the President. "Sir, our advice is to add 10,000 more ground troops."

"Yes, I know. And Josh is right. You are bringing me the same information as last week. I'm not necessarily a fan of this strategy at all. Putting our troops between two disputing nuclear powers. I'm not going to add more without some sort of action plan. If you want more troops, bring me a concrete plan of how you'll use them to end this thing."

The President stands up and everyone else follows. General Alexander stares at me intently before he leaves the room. Safe to say I'm off his Christmas card list.

"We need to get Vinick confirmed." The President says as soon as everyone is out the door. "I want him in this room ASAP."

"I agree. But are you ready to abandon our strategy of keeping Vinick's confirmation tied to Baker's? I don't know what happens if we lose that leverage."

"Just make it happen." He half growls at me. Then he runs a hand over his face. He's just frustrated. Well, then, I'm keeping the strategy in place. I'll also get Vinick in here for a meeting today. Just because he can't be in the room yet doesn't mean he can't stop by for a nice chat.

I glance at my watch: 11:20.

"What was your note?"

"Ron wants to meet Donna and I. In about 10 minutes actually, if that's okay."

"Of course. You know, Josh, Helen feels really terrible about that picture. She said she wasn't thinking, she was just having a little fun."

"Donna told me it was just bad luck that the photographer happened to snap a picture with a red dress in it. Helen shouldn't feel bad, she didn't do anything wrong. It's just one of those things."

"Still, if you wouldn't mind telling her that. I'd appreciate it."

"Sure, no problem"

"So, what's next for Donna? You planning on keeping her under lock and key tomorrow?"

"I don't know. I guess we'll see how this meeting with Ron goes."

"Well, then, get going. I'm going to have lunch with Helen in the Residence. If you're done before one, join us there."

As Kevin and I approach Ron's office from the West Wing, I see Donna and Kathy approaching from the East. I guess there won't be any teasing each other about who is running late today. I don't know why but something tells me there won't be anything light hearted about this meeting. I have a terrible sense of foreboding.

I greet Donna with a kiss as we meet outside Ron's door. "Did you get another email?"

"No. Do you know why Ron called us?"

I shake my head no. "I guess we're about to find out." I place my hand on the small of her back as I guide her through the door. Ron's secretary buzzes him that we're here and he tells her to see us in. Kevin and Kathy take their positions in the outer office.

Once we are settled. Ron dives right in.

"We intercepted an email at 9:38 this morning. It was send from Mt. Pleasant Neighborhood Library." He turns his laptop so we can see it. As we expected there is a picture of Donna & Helen with the red dress. It hasn't been altered. The text of the email reads-

**The First Lady has good taste. Wear the dress and meet me where we first met. Monday at 9am.**

The color drains from Donna's face as she reads it. "We've met before?" It comes out as a whisper. I take her hand and hold it tight.

"Ron- I thought you pegged this as "famous person" stalking?"

"It still could be. It still doesn't have the ear markings of an ex-boyfriend. It could just mean that he saw Donna in person at some point."

I'm frustrated by his answer. It feels like we aren't getting anywhere. "Why haven't you tracked down something yet?!" It comes out a little more harshly than I intended, but Ron just gives me a small smile.

"I know it doesn't feel like it, but we have made some progress. We have eliminated quite a few people off Donna's list."

"Such as?"

"Cliff Calley."

"Cliff! He was on your list?" I look at Donna in surprise. I didn't consider him. As far as I'm concerned he's a stand up guy. Is there something I don't know?

"I asked for a list of everyone she dated. She didn't consider him a suspect but we checked him out. He was not near any libraries at the time any of the emails were sent."

"Who else?"

"Dr., um, Freeloader." Donna shoots Ron a grateful look that I find a little confusing, at the same time I interject-

"Dr. Free _ride_." I hate the guy but let's get his name right.

"Right," Ron continues, "Dr. Freeride has maintained a practice in Wisconsin. He's married with 2 small children. He travels to medical conferences twice a year, but he hasn't been anywhere near DC in the last 10 years."

Ron pauses a minute, clearly trying to decide whether to share additional information.

"He's not cheating on his taxes. He's been audited every year for the last eight years." Ron glances at me and I smirk. Damn right he has.

"He is, however, cheating on his wife." Donna doesn't look surprised. I hate this guy with the burning fire of a nova. I'm just glad Donna got away from him.

"Anyone else?"

"Pretty much all of the one timers where Donna could give us a first and last name. And Todd, the lobbyist from Travis Whitt. He got reassigned to state work in Des Moines. Apparently he wasn't very good at his job."

Well, that news will please Sam. He hasn't been incredibly worried, but he'll be glad to know that Todd has been officially eliminated from suspicion.

"Here's the good news, now that he's brought the First Lady into it, I have a lot more jurisdiction over this situation. Donna," Ron continues, "it would be really helpful if you could try to think of anyone you've encountered that gave you a bad vibe. If we can figure out what he means then we'll know where he'll be on Monday and we can bring him in for a little chat."

Donna laughs mirthlessly, "Anyone in DC who's ever given me a bad vibe over the last 8 years?! You're kidding right?"

Ron looks at her sympathetically. "I know it's frustrating. We're doing all we can to create a profile with the information we have. He's using an email address created from a public computer with dummy information and he only uses it from public computers so tracing it hasn't been that helpful. But that tells us that he's somewhat sophisticated. He has at least some computer knowledge and/or some investigative knowledge. There is probably some significance to the color red, maybe related directly to a dress maybe not. He could be delusional about having met you. It could be that he's thinking of the first place he saw your picture, or it could be that he attended an event where you appeared. Maybe on the campaign trail. Or he could actually have been introduced to you at some point."

"I meet a lot of people." Donna says softly.

"I know." Ron gives her another small smile. "And you're such a nice person, you have a way of making people feel like they matter. People like you."

I see Donna's shoulder's slump. "Being a good person is never a bad thing. Don't let this loser steal your kindness." I tell her as I rub her hand.

"Anyway," Ron says, "this is where we are. We've eliminated all of the serious past boyfriends and most of the one time dates. At this point, it could be someone from Donna's past that became obsessed due to her recent "celebrity" or it could be someone Donna's never met. I'd like you to try again on a list, not just people you dated, but anyone that you think might fit the profile. We also want you to take a look at these photos of the people who were at the Boutique yesterday, just in case anyone looks familiar."

Ron slides a yellow envelope across the desk.

"Okay." Donna says in a small voice.

"This might be a stupid question, but is there any reason we shouldn't just respond to the email and say "Leave me alone, creep? I'm not meeting you anywhere." I inquire.

"Well, yes. That could make him angry enough to be violent towards Donna. We don't really want to take that chance until we know who he is."

"Well, yeah, I guess that makes sense." Since we don't know who it is, it's better if we aren't trying to prevent an attack.

"So, Ron," Donna's voice sounds a little stronger. "What about tomorrow? I'm supposed to go with the First Lady to the food bank to pack Backpacks and then deliver them to a local school."

"There's no reason you shouldn't go. The stalker has a plan to meet you on Monday, he appears to take this photo as a signal that you are receptive, and he appears to think you know who he is. It seems unlikely he'll try anything at the event tomorrow. Of course, we are going to increase security measures anyway, and we will be photographing the crowd."

I glance at my watch. It's 12:15. We have time to meet Matt and Helen in the residence for lunch. Donna looks like she could use something. She's still a little pale. Then the four of us can have a discussion about tomorrow.

"Thanks Ron. I'm sorry I got a little testy."

"Totally understandable Josh. Remember what I told you when this started? We all want to keep Donna safe. Go have some lunch. Take a look at those photos. If anyone stands out let me know."


	26. Chapter 26

Matt and Helen are sitting in the kitchen when we get to the residence.

"Can I make you a ham sandwich?" She asks us. It's a very sweet gesture. She has a staff that will make whatever, but she still wants to do it herself.

"I'm not really hungry." As I respond, I see Josh make a face. He doesn't like it when I skip meals. I feel bad for worrying him. But I really don't have an appetite.

"She says that now, but once I have some food she'll eat half of mine." He grins at me opting for humor instead of a lecture. Smart man.

"Oh, alright." I grumble. "Turkey? or Peanut Butter and Jelly?" I ask Helen.

I know Josh doesn't want ham. He doesn't strictly follow the Jewish diet but he doesn't eat pork on purpose either.

"Pretty sure we have both," Matt says "they keep this refrigerator well stocked."

"Yeah, this not having to grocery shop is pretty alright." Helen smiles, but her eyes don't light up. I think maybe she misses that bit of normal. It's funny how something can be a chore, but you miss it when it's gone.

"Turkey." Josh says. I think he's picking based on what he thinks I'll steal, but I really don't want anything.

Helen pulls the stuff back out of the fridge and makes two sandwiches. I start to protest but she just gives me a "Mom" look. I have a feeling they are all going to gang up on me. She adds some chips and a clementine to each plate. I wouldn't be surprised if she poured us each a glass of milk.

"Thanks." Josh says as she puts the plates in front of us. I pick up the clementine, I can make peeling it take a very long time.

"So," Matt finally drawls out breaking the ice, "what's new on the case?"

At least he's not beating around the bush. Josh tells him about the email and photo and I see the President's eyes darken. Suddenly the thought occurs to me that he might not want me to be around his wife and children anymore. I feel sick to my stomach. I put the clementine back down.

"Donna, are you okay?" Helen asks me softly. I don't want to admit that this is wearing on me. I don't want to be the center of attention. I don't want some gomer from my past effecting my future. I just want to be happy with Josh, do my job, and spend time with my friends.

"Yes, I'm fine." I answer with false cheer, but I can tell no one is really buying it.

"Don't worry, Donna. Ron's the best. They'll get this sorted out soon." Matt sounds completely confident and I do find that reassuring.

"I'll understand if you don't want me to go with Helen tomorrow." I offer.

"Nonsense," Helen quickly responds. "Ron said it would be fine. There's really no reason to change plans at this point."

"We'll do what Ron recommends." Matt says decisively, but I really don't think that's the end of it.

Josh doesn't say anything but I see that he's rubbing the japa mala against his wrist. It's nice that Helen still wants me along and that Matt's okay with it, but I suspect that Josh and I will have another conversation about this tonight.

I need to change this topic. I'm just tired of my life revolving around some stupid emails.

"Hey Josh, we got an invite to an exclusive party for tomorrow night." He looks a little surprised until I hand him the card, then he smiles genuninely.

"Excellent. So what are we watching?"

"Charlotte's Web." Matt responds "It was Miranda's turn to pick."

"Matt!" Helen gasps "It was supposed to be a surprise!"

"Oops. Um, okay, you two are sworn to secrecy by Presidential decree."

Josh and I laugh and promise to keep his secret. It feels good. Josh looks at his watch and says-

"Maybe we'd better head back to the Oval Office, where you are less likely to get yourself in trouble."

Matt grins at him. "Yeah, you're right. Let's go." They both stand up. Josh places a kiss on my cheek, but then looks deep in to my eyes.

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes. I'm just tired."

"You could take a nap. Lots of bedrooms in this place. In fact, there is one on the third floor that is designated for the Chief of Staff. Did you know that?"

I give him a look.

"Silly me. Of course, you knew that." He smiles at me and kisses my forehead.

Yes. I knew that and I don't want to take a nap. I want to do my job.

"I'm fine. I need to get back to my office. We've got that State dinner coming up next month."

Once I'm back in my office, I sit down on my couch and open the yellow envelope. I look through the photos carefully. No one looks familiar to me.

I lean my head back against the couch. I'm relieved that Ron has eliminated Dr. Freeride. I just want that chapter of my life over. I didn't miss Josh's smirk when Ron mentioned the tax audits. I should have known that Josh already had discovered Dr. Freeride's information and done something retaliatory. Dealing with the IRS is a small price for him to pay for what he took from me. I don't really want to think about his wife. I wonder if she knows he's cheating. I wonder if she cares. I'm just so grateful that it's not me. I will be perfectly happy if we never discuss him or that part of my life.

I'm glad it's not Cliff either. I didn't think it would be. He's not my favorite person in the world, but I've come to have mostly neutral feelings toward him. Honestly, the biggest strike against him has always been that he's not Josh. When Ainsley set us up I agreed to the blind date because that was part of the dance that Josh and I were doing. We flirted like mad. I went out on dates. He made fun of them, but we never crossed the line between boss and assistant. I was tired of it. Then Cliff was cute and funny, and he had warm brown eyes and curly brown hair and for a few minutes I thought that maybe, just maybe, it would work. Sleeping with him was the second worst mistake I ever made. I wasn't unhappy that we couldn't have a relationship because of the conflict. I knew he wasn't the one for me. Sometimes I wonder if Josh would have dated Amy if I hadn't gone out with Cliff. I try not to think about it.

Is it bad that I wish it was Todd? He was an asshole. I'd be perfectly fine if it was him and we could just make this all go away. I don't want to try to sit here and think of every guy who ever asked me out or gave me a bad vibe, wondering if one of them has come back to haunt me. It was bad enough trying to make a list the first time.

I push myself up off the couch. I'm just going to focus on my job.

At 4pm, Annabeth, Angela, Karen and Ned arrive for our daily wrap-up meeting.

"Annabeth, what do you know about news coverage?"

"Well, obviously, the outlets I asked want to know what the event is and if they can have an exclusive." She grins.

"Of course." We all chuckle a little.

"But, yes, if someone called in a tip that the First Lady was making an impromptu appearance they'd get news crews there as promptly as possible. It was suggested that we might want to consider the distance between the news station and the event."

"Right." I pause a second. "Let's think through this. Even if we didn't leak, this its going to get out. Ron has vetted 3 elementary schools. We haven't told anyone, including the Food Bank which one we'll be delivering to as of yet. But at any of those schools someone could have told someone that there is a chance the First Lady could be visiting. I think they are going to do the security sweep an hour before we arrive. At that point, it's pretty likely word gets out. I think that's the point we give it to the news outlets. That gives them enough time to get set up at the school for good coverage and we might even end up with a bit of coverage of us leaving the food bank as well."

I look around the room

"Anyone else have an opinion on this?"

"From a media stand point, I think it's fine." Annabeth answers. "As your friend, are you sure?"

"Yes. I don't want to go into too much detail. But Ron is not concerned that this event will trigger anything. He has no problem with me going. Neither do the President or First Lady."

"What about Josh?" Karen asks.

I ignore her question.

"Okay, next on our agenda, I want to talk about the state dinner. The Office of the Social Secretary is running point, but our job is oversight. I want to be kept fully in the loop. Karen, schedule a meeting with the Social Secretary, Florist and Head Usher for next week so I can find out where they are in the planning."

Karen nods.

"Ned, where are we on the PTA speaking engagement?"

"Um, I RSVP'd yes." Okay. Well I guess that's all I told him to do.

"Did you speak with someone in person?"

"Yes."

"Did they give you any information on the topic or other guest speakers, or honorees or anything?"

"No."

"Okay, then. I'd like you to call back. Ask if they have a theme or topic, ask if there will be any other speakers or honorees, and ask how long they would like her remarks to be."

I'm trying to give Ned a little bit more to do than answer phones and sort mail, but so far I find him to be rather unimpressive.

"Anyone have anything else to discuss?"

"Alright then. I'll see you all at 9 tomorrow. We'll leave around 10:30 for the food bank. OH! Dress business casual, slacks, comfortable shoes, nice tops. Something where you look a like a professional but not out of place doing community service. We'll be packing backpacks for at least 90 minutes. We don't want this to look like a staged photo. Ned- shirt with a collar but no tie."

Once they all head back to their offices, I go back to my computer. I check my email and I'm happy to see they are all work related. I'll be glad when opening email doesn't make my heart pound. I read through them making notes to myself about which Members of Congress have reached out to the First Lady with invitations, initiative ideas and general support. Part of my job is tasks and part of my job is managing the First Lady's political clout, and do to that, I've got to keep track of all the players.

At 6:15 I hear a light knocking and Josh walks in. My face lights up when I see him and he grins back at me. I don't know why I ever doubted that he'd be genuinely happy to see me on this side of a big desk.

"Ready to go home?" He asks. That's two days in a row he's beat me out of the office. This is not what I expected at all.

"Fifteen more minutes? I'd like to finish these notes."

He sits down on the sofa and looks down at the table. The photos Ron gave me earlier are still sitting there. Josh doesn't say anything as he picks them up and begins to look through them.

I go back to typing my notes, glad that it's just transposing my handwritten notes into the computer, because I keep stealing glances at Josh. If I had to concentrate right now, I'd be in trouble.

He's going through the photos very slowly, studying each face carefully. He's still looking at them when I finish typing and log off my computer. I can't tell if he's been through the stack twice.

Once I stand up, Josh stands up too. He slides the photos into the yellow envelope and puts them in his backpack. Then he picks up my coat and holds it open for me. I smile to myself as I slip my arms into it. This is one of my favorite little things that Josh does. He's more of a gentleman than anyone ever gave him credit for.

As we leave the office, Jackie and Scott fall in behind us. Scott lets the motorcade know that we are on the way down.

In the car, I sit in the middle. Josh pulls me close as soon as I buckle my seatbelt. I lean into him an sigh. It's been a long day. When we get home, I head into the bedroom to change my clothes. I have no idea what to do about dinner. We just had pizza last night. Now I wish I had save it for tonight. I don't feel like cooking but I don't want to do take out twice in a row, even though I know Josh won't mind.

I sit down on the bed and take my shoes off. Then I lean back and close my eyes for a second. I breath deeply and try to stop my thoughts from circulating in my head. A few minutes later I feel the bed sag and Josh's hand running over my hair.

"Come on, get up. You need to eat something." He gets up then takes my hand and pulls me up, smiling at me. I can't help but smile back at him. As long as I have that, the rest will work out. We've overcome too much to believe that there's any other possibility.

Josh leads me through the kitchen into the dining room. The table is set. There are candles glowing in the candlesticks he gave me for Christmas. There is a big bowl of spaghetti and meatballs and a small salad. The salad looks suspiciously like the left-overs from last night.

"You made dinner?"

"Yes, but you must never tell your Mother I used frozen meatballs, boxed pasta and a store-bought sauce." He grins throwing my words back at me.

I give him a big kiss. "I'll never rat you out."


	27. Chapter 27

She looks so happy to see a homemade dinner on the table. I'm really glad I didn't just order in. I had put the water on to boil when she went into to change. Once I realized that she was dozing, I just wanted to show her that I can take care of her, and not just by ordering take out.

"You made dinner!" She repeats.

"You don't need to sound so shocked about it." I tease a little. Maybe I did cultivate that "helpless persona" a little too well around her if she thinks that boiling water and heating up a jar of sauce is beyond my capabilities.

"God, I love you so much." She wraps her arms around me. "So I guess I fell asleep in there?" She looks at her watch. It's just after 7, so it really wasn't that long. I haven't changed out of my work clothes yet either.

"This was really nice, Josh. Thanks."

"Well, you haven't actually tried it yet. Maybe you should wait and see." I'm trying to keep the mood light. She just really seems stressed out today. I hold out her chair and she sits down.

"So how's the planning for the state dinner going?"

She grins and launches in. "I'm still trying to figure out that part of my job. There are whole offices of people that pull together those things but technically they are part of the office of the First Lady so I have a supervisory role. And I'm not really that comfortable in that. I'm more of a roll up your sleeves and help get it done kind of person."

I totally get where she's coming from right now. But I know she's capable of this.

"Plus Helen isn't really interested in planning state dinners, so pretty much any time they want her input she refers them back to me. She's still in a bit of mourning over losing her old life. She wants to stay home and bake cookies and be on the PTA!"

"Speaking of the PTA- how's that coming along?"

"Once Ned got all the information I think we're on track."

"How's he working out?"

"He's a nice guy, but he's not very . . ." She pauses, she really doesn't like to say negative things about people. I'm still amazed at some of the zingers she came up with against Santos in the capaign, but there was no doubt it was her. That campaign wasn't bright enough for it have been someone else feeding them to her. Plus they never really attacked Santos as a person, only his credentials, if it had been Bingo Bob or Will it would have been personal.. The Kung Po Chicken and Overhead bin quotes were golden. They were witty and memorable. That was the problem.

Donna takes another bite of spaghetti while she's looking for the right way to describe Ned. We eat in silence for a few minutes. I can wait, I'm just happy to see her finally eating a few bites. I have no problem describing Ned but I'm curious to see how she views him. She didn't meet him until he started working for the First Lady's office. Maybe in a lower pressure environment he's fine.

"He's nice, but he's just unimpressive. He contributes very little to the meetings. He does exactly what you ask, almost to the letter. Not only doesn't he show any initiative, he doesn't think to ask to make sure he's understanding what you want. He definitely isn't a strategist. He doesn't really have much of a grasp on the big picture."

Donna looks at me for agreement and I nod. "Why do you think I fired him? He just couldn't keep up. It wasn't my idea to send him back to the congressional office. But I didn't hear anything from him after that."

As I say the word, "fired" a though occurs to me. Could we be looking at this stalker thing wrong? Could this be someone who has an issue with me? God knows I've made plenty of political enemies over the years. I'll have to ask Ron about that possibility. But in the meantime we should get on with discussing her list.

I hate to bring the topic up with Donna when we are having an enjoyable evening but we need to have a conversation tonight.

"So. . ." I begin. As soon as I do her eyes flash up to mine. She can tell the change in tone. "I didn't recognize anyone in the photographs, did you?"

I'm pretty sure the answer is no. If she had she would have told Ron and me. I'm sure she'd have been relieved to feel like we had more progress.

"No." she sighs. Then she gets up and starts clearing the table. My plate was empty but she hardly ate anything. I'm kicking myself for bringing it up before she had finished. I pop another meatball into my mouth and carry the bowl of spaghetti and the rest of the salad into the kitchen. I made too much. I couldn't remember whether to use a whole box and whole jar of sauce. Half of each would have been fine.

"What should I do with these?" I ask.

"Wrap the spaghetti bowl in plastic wrap and put it in the refrigerator. Just throw the salad out."

Donna rinses the dishes and puts them in the dishwasher while I take care of the leftover spaghetti. As I'm putting it in the fridge I glance through it quickly to see if anything else should get thrown out. The cleaning people come tomorrow.

"So. . ." I start again as Donna starts the dishwasher.

"I'm going to change." She says walking into the bedroom. I stand in the doorway between our bedroom and the kitchen. I'm starting to think she's trying to avoid this conversation.

I give her a few minutes, just watching as she takes off her suit and puts the Harvard sweatshirt and pajamas pants on. Then she heads toward the bathroom. I might as well get more comfortable too. Once I've changed into sweats, I sort the stuff that needs to go to the dry cleaners.

When Donna comes out, she heads back to the kitchen. "I'm going to check the grocery list."

"Donna. Stop." I say firmly. "Are you running away from this?" We've had this discussion before. Neither of us is very good at confrontation but we've both been working on being better at communicating with each other.

She looks at me with a mixture of sheepishness and annoyance. So yes, she's trying to avoid this conversation. I'm not sure whether she's annoyed at the circumstances or me calling her out on it.

"We need to talk about what Ron said this afternoon. Pick a spot and let's sit down."

"God, Josh, I'm just tired of talking about it!" She snaps at me.

"Okay." I answer her softly. I'm not sure what else to say. I can't make her talk. I walk into the living room and pick up my backpack. There are always memos to read. I hope she'll come find me when she's ready.

I sit down on the couch, but I can't focus. I'm not sure what to do. This feels like a fight but I'm not sure what we're fighting about. I'm not angry with her. I just want us to talk this through and see if we can think of any new information for Ron. But it feels like she's shutting me out.

" ** _Josh_**!" She practically wails from the bedroom. I sprint to her. She's sitting cross-legged on the bed with her laptop open.

"Another email" she says as I sit down next to her.

[Be careful riding around in Black SUVs my love. I don't want to see you on crutches again.]

I gather her in my arms and hold her for a minute. Then I remember the need for action.

"What's the time stamp on that?"

"7:37 It just popped up."

"I'll call Ron." I run out to the living room to get my cell phone and run back to her as I'm dialing the number.

"Ron Butterfield" I hear him answer just as I'm heading back into the bedroom. Donna is staring at the computer with her hand over her mouth, paler than I've ever seen.

"It's Josh. Donna just got another email. It popped up about a minute ago."

"Okay Josh, I'm going to hang up and call the office and get them tracing it. Then I'm going to send your agent in to check on you."

"Okay."

I sit back down on the bed and Donna burrows into my arms. While I was getting my phone, she clicked on the attachment. A photo of her standing in front of a Black SUV in Gaza fills the screen. She's smiling happily at the camera. Looking at the photo makes me want to vomit because I know that a few minutes after Colin took this picture she was hanging upside down in that Black SUV covered in blood.

We hear a loud knocking on the door and Donna jumps.

"It's just the agent. If I don't answer it he'll use the key."

Sure enough a second later, I hear-

"Mr. and Mrs. Lyman. It's Jackie. I'm coming in."

"We're in the bedroom." I call out to her.

"Are you both okay?" She asks.

"Yes. Just another email. It popped up while Donna was on the computer so I knew that Ron would want to know about it right away."

"Yes, sir. I'm just going to do a sweep of the apartment."

"Okay, thank you."

A few minutes later we hear the door shut. Donna continues to just lay with her head on my chest while I stroke her hair. I start to murmur to her, trying to be reassuring.

"Hey. It's going to be fine. I won't let anything happen to you. If he wants to get to you it's going to be over my dead body."

"That's what I'm afraid of." She whispers back.


	28. Chapter 28

Things have been pretty quiet this morning. Neither of us had a good nights sleep, and I think we are both afraid of saying something that is going to hurt the other person's feelings. When I got dressed this morning in business casual clothes, Josh knew that I planned to got to the Food Bank with the First Lady.

He smiled at me and told me that I looked nice, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. I said thanks then I walked up to him, put my arms around him and laid my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around me and just held me for a few minutes. Then he said, "time to go" and got my coat. Thinking about it makes my head and my heart hurt.

It kills me to think that I'm disappointing him by choosing to go to this event. But the thing, is we have no idea how long this could go on. I laid in bed all night and tried to think of who this could be. I've been on so many bad dates it's not even funny. And now Ron wants me to try to think of every creep that tried a bad pick-up line? It makes me feel ill to think it could be one of them. But it makes me feel angry to think about letting something like this stop me from participating in life. I can't stay hidden in the White House until this blows over. I'll be surrounded by Secret Service today. It's really not that big of a risk.

I think Josh knows this. I think that's why he hasn't asked me not to go.

Margaret could tell something was off when we had breakfast in his office. Normally it's a lot of joking between the three of us but this morning I had nothing to say as Margaret went through Josh's schedule. When she asked for his lunch order he'd said I'm not sure where I'll be then, I'll just get something on my own.

Once she left, he'd looked at the bagel still sitting in front of me and said "I really wish you'd eat something. You're going to be gone most of the day. Are you sick of bagels, I can have Margaret go get you a muffin." He looked so sad when I turned him down, it almost broke my heart. But I'm just not hungry.

I stayed through Senior Staff mostly just to be near Josh, but I really wasn't paying attention other than to give a run down of the days itinerary. I thought about skipping out on Senior Staff with the President, but that would be letting the gomer win. So here I sit, not really paying attention.

"Okay everyone. I think all those plans will hold until tomorrow. Today I'd like to propose that we ALL go to the Capital Area Food Bank and prepare the bags then deliver them to the school." Matt is grinning.

"What? Wait. NO!" Everyone turns and looks at me and I turn red. Um. Did I say that out loud?

Luckily, no one waits for me to say anything else. They start talking all at once.

"Excellent!" Lou answers. "Will you give any remarks? I can have Otto start drafting some language. He can work on it in the car while the rest of us work in the food bank."

"A little more notice next time wouldn't hurt." Edie grumbles, but she's smiling, clearly looking forward to it.

"I would love to." Sam responds. "Is it alright if I check with Anisley to see if she's available."

"Of course, Sam. The more the merrier." The President responds.

Josh still hasn't said anything. He knows that I was talking to him. He's looking at me with a mixture of understanding, determination and . . . happiness?

Of course. He's happy that he gets to go. I won't be able to talk him out of it, not unless I offer to stay behind as well. And that's what the look of understanding is, because he knows exactly how I feel because he experienced it Wednesday. Funny, how earlier I convinced myself it wasn't that big of a risk, but the minute I find out Josh is coming along I'm re-evaluating.

"Donna," Bram interrupts my thought process, "have you already vetted FeedingAmerica's press statement? Can I get it from Annabeth?"

I snap out of my daze and flip back into professional mode. I need to focus.

"Yes, of course. I'm sure she's already in the office. She'll email it to you and you can tweak it. Once they have final approval, they'll release it as soon as we finish there."

"Mr. President, is Ron aware of our change in numbers?" I just realized I have no idea how spontaneous this plan is.

"Yes, Donna. I spoke with him last night."

Ah. I see. Matt knew that there was no way that Josh would let me out of his sight today. So he decided to make a way for Josh to come along without it being quite so obvious. The question is, was Josh in on it? I suppose it doesn't really matter.

"Okay then, I'll call the Food Bank and let them know we are bringing a few more volunteers."

I look around the room. Everyone except me is wearing a suit.

"Hey everyone, if you can lose the jackets and ties before we leave, that'd be great. We want it to look like you came to volunteer, not get a photo op. Lou, Edie, Amy, if you have more comfortable shoes, I'd wear them."

Lou sticks her foot out. She's already wearing black gym shoes. She's smirks. She's always put comfort over appearance in that department.

"Okay, Let's meet at the Portico at 10:30." I announce. Then I blush a little. I just took over Senior Staff. Josh is looking at me with pride. The President grins.

"You heard the lady. Get moving."

"Thank you, Mr. President." Everyone says as they leave the room.

Josh comes up and gives me a quick hug and peck on the cheek. "I'm so proud of you. See you in about 90 minutes." Then he walks back into his own office.

I stand there a moment, a little stunned. This morning has been a bit of a rollercoaster. While I'm convinced that I'm not in any real danger, I'm concerned for Josh. This turn of events is not exactly welcome. I look at President Santos.

"Was this his idea?"

"It was my decision."

"Forgive me, sir. But that doesn't really answer the question."

"Donna, Donna. Forgive me for sounding patronizing but you have no idea what it's like to be a man." I fix Matt with a glare.

"No. But I do understand what its like to be worried about someone you love. Do you know how many times I've had to let him walk out the door to go do his job then go to the bathroom to throw up? He doesn't have the corner on the market when it comes to worry you know!"

The last sentence comes out a little sharp. I'm trying to maintain my cool. I can't forget that I'm standing in the Oval Office talking to the President. I take a deep breath and smile.

"I'm sorry. I'm sure the Food Bank will be happy to have additional volunteers and this is a great opportunity for staff bonding. If there's nothing else I'll just head up to my office to finalize some details."

"Of course."

"Thank you, Mr. President."

As I walk out the door, he calls out to me-

"Donna. . . you're _both_ going to be fine."

Ninety minutes later Josh and I are in the limo facing Matt and Helen, on our way to the Food Bank. In spite of the tension, I'm really excited. This is a really great cause and it is going to feel good to do something practical.

"Can I see the Press Release?" Josh asks.

(Press Release) February 2, 2007*

_Feeding America is pleased to announce that President Matthew Santos, First Lady Helen Santos, and twelve Senior Staff Members, including their respective Chiefs of Staff, Josh and Donna Lyman, joined volunteers from the community at the Capital Area Food Bank today in Washington, DC. Each week the Capital Area Food Bank provides over 1,000 bags of food for hungry children in the DC Metropolitan Area who participate in the "Weekend Bag Program." Each bag contains enough food for five meals - enough food to get a child through the weekend when they do not have access to school meals. Approximately 200,000 children are at risk of hunger in the Washington, DC Metropolitan Area. That is one in five children. The commitment of these individuals to help us bring greater awareness to the growing need of hungry Americans could not come at a more critical time as millions more people turn to us for help in these tough economic times._

_**INFORMATION ABOUT HUNGER IN WASHINGTON, DC** _

_The Capital Area Food Bank is a member of Feeding America and last year provided nearly 24 million pounds of food to hungry people in the Washington, DC Metropolitan area. In the Washington, DC Metropolitan area, there are approximately 633,000 residents are at risk of, or experiencing hunger; that is 1 in 6. (U.S. Census Bureau). The Capital Area Food Bank's Weekend Bag Program serves 1000 children each week at 24 sites in the metro area._

"The Food Bank will release it as soon as we are done packing and on our way to the school for delivery."

"Are we all going to the school?" Josh asks, and my heart sinks. He's probably right that we don't all need to go, but I really want to.

"That's the fun part! We are going to drop the bags off then we're going to join a class and watch them learn about healthy eating." Helen exclaims. "I want my whole staff there. It wouldn't hurt you to go, too Josh." She smirks at him.

Matt gives Josh a look that seems to say, "I've done all I can." Then he says- "Josh if you want to take the rest of the Senior Staff back to the White House that's up to you. I'll be joining the First Lady and her staff."

I'll see your President and raise you a First Lady. I think to myself. Then I feel kind of bad. This isn't supposed to be a contest between us. I'm not trying to beat him. I take his hand and hold on tight.

Once we get to the Food Bank the director takes us to a warehouse staging area. She gives us a brief explanation of how the program works.

"We have a crew of warehouse workers that pick all of the items that are needed based on the number needed for each school and lay them out appropriately so volunteers don't have to deal with the bulk storage in our warehouse. Typically, a volunteer picks up the food items and drives them to school for all the backpacks to be stuffed on location.

But for special situations like this, we do the packing right here. A volunteer has already retrieved all the backpacks from the designated schools. They are all set up on these tables. There are 40 packs from Barnard, 43 from Powell and 42 from Hyde-Addison. So we'll be packing a total of 125 here. You'll each have an assigned item. You'll get a carton of that item and then walk around the table and put the correct number of each in each bag. Okay?"

We all nod.

"Here's a list of what we are packing today. Donna, can you give them assignments. Some of the items you can assign to more than one person and they can just start on different schools. Also we need a couple people to double check the bags. Once they are complete you zip them up and put a sticker on them."

I take the list and start reading out loud, naming staff members as I do:

President Santos- peanut butter (1 jar per bag)  
Mrs. Santos- clementines (1 small bag per bag)  
Sam & Ainsley- apples (2 per bag)  
Lou & Edie- spaghettios (2 cans per bag)  
Angela & Bram- juice boxes (1 6 pack per bag)  
Amy- fruit cups (3 per bag)  
Annabeth- individual portions of cereal (3 per bag)  
Ned- boxes of raisins (1 6 pack per bag)  
Karen- goldfish (1 box per bag)

I turn back to the director. "We brought M&Ms with the Presidential Seal. Is it okay for us to add those to the bags as well?"

"Yes, as long as you have enough to do all the bags from a particular school. It's important that if you run out none of the bags from that school have them."

"We have enough. Josh- Do you want to do the M&Ms?" He grins at me. I did give him the best assignment.

"I'll do the double checking and as some of the others finish they can help me."

"Okay. Let's start."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (*A/N Based on an actual press release from FeedingAmerica dot org from Michelle Obama's visit in 2009- This is a great program that I wanted to give you real information about.)


	29. Chapter 29

I love watching Donna take charge. She's just so amazing. She kept everyone on task, but with her bright smile and witty conversation everyone was laughing and having a good time. I especially liked it when she teased everyone about giving them assignments that matched their personalities. The look on Amy's face was priceless.

Back in the motorcade, Matt grumbles "How can I be like peanut butter?"

Helen leans over and whispers something in his ear and his eyebrows shoot up. I really don't want to know what she said.

Donna is positively glowing. "Okay I spoke with the school principal just a few minutes ago. Instead of having us visit just one class she's going to spread us out over five classes. There is a fifteen minute lesson that's part of the USDA Fresh Fruit and Vegetable Program for elementary schools. All the children get a serving of 2 different kinds of fruit or vegetables to compare. It encourages them to try new things. The principal said they'd have enough for at least 1 of us in each room to try it. Maybe more depending on any absences."

She pulls a legal pad out of her bag and starts to write out assignments:

POTUS, Bram & Ned

FLOTUS, Annabeth & Angela

Josh, Lou & Otto

Donna, Karen & Amy

Sam, Ainsley & Edie

"Hey! How come Sam and Ainsley get to be together, but you split us up?" Donna rolls her eyes at me.

"I think it would be a good idea for the five of us to each take a separate classroom. We should all participate." She gives me a pointed look.

"What's today's snack?"

"Brussels Sprouts & Radishes." She smirks at me.

"You're kidding." Please, please let her be kidding.

"Nope."

"I should have let you come on your own." I tease her. Everyone smirks at me. I'd take a bullet for her, eating a few vegetables is a small price to pay. But still, she's not going to be in my class . . . I look over her list again to see who is in my group. Maybe I'll make Otto eat my snack.

As we arrive at the school, I see lots of press, including at least 3 national news affiliates. There is a decent size crowd behind the rope line. The Secret Service presence seems larger than usual, but maybe I just notice them more now.

Bram hands each of us 2 backpacks as we get out of the limo. I slip both of mine over my left arm so that I can still place my right hand on Donna's back as we walk into the building.

The principal greets us and directs us to put the backpacks in a small room by the office.

"We're not giving them to the students?" Annabeth asks.

"No. The students will come down and pick them up before they go home. We try to keep this very low profile. We don't want anyone to feel embarassed."

The President nods at her. I think he has a better understanding about what a program like this means than the rest of us do.

"Okay, let's go to the classrooms. I think you'll enjoy this." The principal smiles at all of us and leads the way down the hall. Several doors already have Secret Service agents standing in front of them. As we get to the first classroom, the Principal opens the door. The President, Bram and Ned follow her in. The Vice-Principal leads the First Lady, Annabeth and Angela into the room next door.

Donna and I are stopped at the next set of doors. I lean over and kiss her cheek.

"Eat 'em up!" I tell her.

" _You_ eat 'em up!" She laughs back at me. Then we follow our guides into the separate rooms.

"Class, this is Mr. Lyman, Ms. Thorton and Mr. Ramon, they all work for President Santos. They are here to learn more about healthy eating."

The teacher has 3 chairs in front of the blackboard. Great. We get to be front and center for this. Lou, Otto and I take our seats and the teacher begins the lesson.

"Today we are going to learn a little bit about Brussels Sprouts and Radishes. Then you're all going to get to try them."

"Radishes are root vegetables that resemble beets or turnips in appearance and texture, but have a distinct flavor. It is the root of a plant classified in the mustard family. In the United States, radishes are usually eaten raw; however, they can be added to cooked dishes or served whole. The biggest crops grown in the United States come from California and Florida, but most states grow radishes. "

"Brussels sprouts look like little heads of cabbage and they are a member of the cabbage family. They are similar in taste to cabbage, but are slightly milder in flavor and denser in texture. Most Brussels sprouts are grown in California. Brussels sprouts can be steamed, boiled, or microwaved. They make a tasty addition to soups, stews and casseroles."

"Okay, before we try our new veggies we are going to play a little game. We talked about cabbage back in the fall. Let's see how much you remember. I'll give a statement. If it's true, stand up. If you think it's false, sit down. Ready?"

"Yes, Ms. Wilson!" The class says in unison.

"1. The heaviest cabbage ever grown weighed over 125 pounds!" I have no idea but it sounds plausible. Most of the class stands up, so I go with the majority.

"True. In places that have extra long days in the summer, like Alaska, cabbages can grow to be HUGE!"

"2. Cabbages grow underground like carrots." I sit back down right away. As soon as I do the rest of the class does as well. Oops. Maybe I shouldn't be playing?

"You're all right. It's False. Cabbages grow above the ground, so do Brussels sprouts. They are clusters of leaves that grow tightly together. Leaves need sunlight so they couldn't grow underground. Radishes are roots like carrots, they grow underground."

"3. The word cabbage comes from the French word for head." True! I spring out of my chair.

"Hey there, skippy, you wanna slow down and give the kids a chance?" Lou whispers harshly under her breath.

"Mr. Lyman is correct." The teacher smiles indulgently at me. "The word cabbage comes from the French word "caboche," which is one word for head."

"4. If you eat cabbage and Brussel sprouts, you are less likely to get cancer." Well I don't actually know the answer to this one. I stand here and think about it. Some of the kids sit back down.

"True! Cabbage has been proven to help prevent cancer. Cabbage also has lots of Vitamin C." Well I'm glad I was already standing while I thought about it.

"5. Before Band-Aids, cabbage was used to cover and protect wounds."

Most of the kids stand. So I'm guessing they remember this from their other lessons. I stay standing.

"True! Cabbage has antibacterial qualities and was used on wounds like a band aid." Woo Hoo! 5 for 5! I wonder if Donna's getting the same lesson. This seems like trivia she'd enjoy.

"Okay. We are going to try our Radishes and Brussels sprouts now. Who is on snack duty today?"

Four hands shoot up.

"Okay, Jacob & Kaitlyn get the hand sanitizer. Michael and Ashley you can start passing out the snack. Remember everyone, don't eat until you've sanitized, and I'd like you to try at least one bite of each before you use any dip."

My head perks up when she says dip. Please, god, let it be ranch dressing.

When Ashley and Michael get to the front of the room with the tray, I'm sorry to see that there is enough for all three of us. Well, there goes my plan of making Otto take one for the team. I guess I'm just going to have to suck it up and be a man. I'm staring at my plate trying to decide which of these choices is the lesser of two evils to start with when I hear a camera click. I look up and see the White House photographer grinning at me. Great. Here I thought I was safe because no press was allowed in the building. But we did bring our own photographer to get group shots of the classes.

When we leave the school, the reporters start shouting questions. President Santos and Helen stop on the steps and the staff gather behind them.

"This morning my Senior Staff, Helen and I helped pack food at the Capital Area Food Bank as part of the "Weekend Bag Program." That program serves over 1,000 kids at 24 area elementary schools, most of whom would not have anything to eat this weekend if not for that program. While we were here dropping the bags off, we were invited to participate in a classroom nutrition lesson as part of the Fresh Fruit and Vegetable Program. The FFVP provides all children in participating schools with a variety of free fresh fruits and vegetables throughout the school day. It is an effective and creative way of introducing fresh fruits and vegetables as healthy snack options. The FFVP also encourages schools to develop partnerships at the State and local level for support in implementing and operating the program. The Goals of the FFVP are to create healthier school environments by providing healthier food choices; expand the variety of fruits and vegetables children experience; increase children's fruit and vegetable consumption; and make a difference in children's diets to impact their present and future health . This program is seen as an important catalyst for change in efforts to combat childhood obesity by helping children learn more healthful eating habits. "

"President Santos! President Santos!"

"I'm sorry everyone, we don't really have time for questions right now. About which I'm sure Josh Lyman is glad, because I know we're all wondering if he ate his Brussels sprouts."

Back in the limo, everyone is grinning. That really was fun.

"Good job, baby." I whisper in her ear and give her a gentle kiss on her cheek. We normally try to avoid terms of endearment at work but I just can't resist. And when we are alone with Matt and Helen it's really not a big deal.

"There's no reason for you guys to go home after work. Why don't you come to the residence for dinner before the movie?" Helen suggests.

"Is it Pizza night?" I ask.

"After we just learned all about Brussels Sprouts and Radishes? I don't think so, Josh." Helen smirks at me.

"We'd love to come for dinner." Donna interjects giving me a look.

"Donna's right. We'd love to come for dinner. But in the meantime, can you make sure she eats some lunch. I happen to know she didn't have any breakfast today."

Helen gives her a "Mom" look and I smirk at Donna. I can play the First Lady card too.

At 6pm, Matt and I head up to the residence to meet the girls.

"Tio Josh! Guess what we're having for dinner?" Peter greets me enthusiastically.

"Um, Brussel Sprouts and Radishes?" I answer, giving Helen a smirk.

"Ew. No." He replies. "Since it was Miranda's turn to pick the movie, I got to pick what to have for dinner. I picked hamburgers and french fries. It's your favorite, right?"

"Yes! It is! Thanks, Man." What a great kid. I can't believe he used his pick to choose something I'd like.

We all head into the family dining room and a few minute later the ushers bring up dinner. When they take the covers off our plates I'm happy to see that my burger is well-done. I look up at Donna who shoots me a wink from across the table. I really do have the greatest wife ever.

After dinner, we all head downstairs to the movie theater. Miranda is skipping around greeting everyone, making sure they have popcorn and boxes of candy, and sodas. She's a very good little hostess.

Donna and I find our favorite seats. As we sit down with a big tub of popcorn to share, I think about all the great memories I have of this place. As soon as the lights go out, I lean over and give Donna a long passionate kiss. When I pull back she looks a little stunned.

"I've always wanted to do that." I tell her with a grin. Last week we were sitting too close to Peter and Miranda for me to try it.

"Get a room." Sam whispers from behind us.

"No talking!" Miranda shouts from the front row. Donna covers her mouth and tries not to giggle.

When the movie is almost finished, I look over at Donna and see tears streaming down her face. I'm not surprised. She almost always cries at the movies.

The first time she did it, it freaked me out. It took three or four times before I finally got her to confess to me. I still remember the conversation.

 _As I pulled up in front of her building, I finally said-_ " _You know you can tell me if something's wrong don't you?"_  
She laughed a little at herself- "you're going to think I'm strange."  
"I already think you're strange."  
She looked at me for a minute with her big eyes, "There's just something about the darkness, the sad music, no one can see you, and it just sort of comes over me, and it feels good to just let it go. To cry over something that doesn't matter. Because there's just too many things that do matter to actually stop and cry for them." Then she shrugged her shoulders and laughed a little.

Then she thanked me for the ride, and got out of the car and went into her apartment. As I sat waiting to make sure she was safely inside, I remember thinking that I'd never meet anyone like her ever again in my life.

The lights come up and I hand Donna a napkin so she can wipe her face.

"Charlotte died. It's just so sad." She smiles at me and I just want to take her in my arms and never let go.

"Feel better?" I ask.

"Yeah, I do, but let's go home."


	30. Chapter 30

We walk through the doors of the West Wing at 9 am on Saturday morning. The place is buzzing, although not nearly as much as it would have be during the Bartlet Administration. When we get to Josh's office, Margaret is there waiting. She was a little put out that he hadn't told her he was coming in last Saturday. Josh is smart enough not to make that mistake again. I give him a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm going to run up to my office. I bet that Annabeth is there reviewing the newspapers now. I'll be back before lunch."

"Okay. Do you want a salad for lunch? I'm going to order in."

"Sure. Maybe Soup too?"

"Anything you want."

"You spoil me." I give him another kiss.

"Hardly ever." He responds.

Susan follows me up to the office. Sure enough both Annabeth and Angela are there.

"Hey guys!" I greet them. "How'd we do in the news cycle?"

"Hey Donna. Angela is searching the web now. She's downloading articles and putting them into a shared file. You'll be able to access it from your computer or laptop so you can review them without having to do the searches."

"Wow. That's great. Thanks Angela."

"I'm going through the newspapers now. Do you want to help or do you have other things you need to do?" Annabeth asks.

"I'll help. That's mostly what I came in for today." Plus if I do this I don't have to work on my list for Ron. I follow her into her office.

"Which papers have you already looked at?"

"I started with the Washington Post. Really good story in there, mostly highlighting the FFVP program since they already covered the other angles earlier this week. There's a great photo of the group standing on the steps, and a photo of the President and First Lady walking into the school."

"Excellent." I pick up the New York Times and flip through it jotting down notes about the coverage.

About 45 minutes, later Annabeth and I are done with the newspapers.

"Let's check on Angela." Annabeth suggests.

"How are you doing out here?" I ask her.

"I'm good." She says a bit shyly. "Would like to see the blog updates?"

"Yes, thanks."

She's added several new photos of our outings. I'm glad to see she didn't include the shopping one. There's a great picture of Helen and Matt smiling at each other while they stuff backpacks.

"The White House Photographer dropped off the photos from yesterday." Angela says. Then she shows me that she has all the school class shots up on the blog.

"Great. I'll order copies for each child in each of the classrooms. I want each staff member to sign the photo and then we'll mail them back to the school. That will be a great keepsake for those kids."

I pick up the envelope and start looking through the photos to see if there are multiples to choose from for each group.

I stop when I get to a candid photo of Josh. He's looking down at a plate of vegetables with a look of despair. It's absolutely adorable. If this photo gets out, he'll never hear the end of it. It's total blackmail material. It's very lucky for him that it was taken by a White House photographer and not a press pool photographer.

I think I need a framed copy for my office.

I'm also ready to go back down to his office and just be with him. I can take my laptop and work down there.

"Okay guys. I'm going back to Josh's office. Don't feel like you have to stay much longer. The rest of this can wait until Monday. It's pretty light next week anyway."

When I get to Josh's office his door is closed.

"Is anyone in there?" I ask Margaret.

"No. He's on the phone with Senator Enlow." Margaret makes a face. Yeah, I'm sure that's not a pleasant call. Enlow tried to get Josh fired as campaign manager. I'm kind of curious to see how Josh is handling him now. I turn the knob slowly and open the door silently.

Josh is leaning back in his chair with his eyes closed, listening. I slide in and walk quietly to the couch. After a few minutes, he speaks. His tone of voice makes my heart pound.

"Senator. I'm not playing games here. Every serious Democrat is going to unite behind the President on this. Baker is his choice for Vice-President. It will happen, and anyone who slows me down along the way will pay for that mistake. I am clear?"

His voice is intense. One thing that I've learned over the years is that Josh bellowing or blustering isn't that concerning, but when Josh speaks in this tone of voice, you'd better do what he says or you will suffer the consequences. When he uses this voice, there really is no doubt that he's a powerful man.

"Very good." He says into the phone before hanging up. Then he turns and looks at me. God. I want him.

He beckons me over with his finger. Without a word I stand up and walk over to him.

"Sit down." He says in the voice he just used on the Senator. He knows it turns me on. I immediately drop into his lap.

"Kiss me." He orders.

I grab his face with my hands and kiss him deeply. His hands slide under my sweater and are skimming my breasts. I feel his arousal pressing against my ass. This was a bad idea. There's a reason why we don't kiss like this in the White House. We're thirty seconds from christening his couch. I pull back.

"Stop." I say weakly, but he immediately does. We are both panting. We stare into each other's eyes for a minute. I'm running through the list of people that could walk through the door any minute trying to distract myself from what I really want to do. Josh groans and drops his forehead against mine.

"What are you thinking about right now?" He finally asks me.

"Miranda Santos walking through that door with her father."

'Yep. That'll definitely kill the mood." He looks up at me and grins. "God, woman. What you do to me!"

"Me?!" I squeak, standing up and walking back over to the couch. "That was all your fault. You know what that voice does to me!"

He smirks at me, eyes smoldering. "Just wait until I get you home, young lady."

I'm about to launch myself at him again when Margaret knocks on the door. Thank god.

"Come in!" Josh bellows.

"Are you ready for me to call Senator Canton?" She asks him.

"Yes, please." Josh answers. Maybe I'd better go work somewhere else. Josh continues to smirk at me while I follow Margaret out the door.

Once the door closes behind me, Margaret says-

"You might want to go splash some water on your face."

When I get back from the restroom, Josh's door is open. Margaret grins at me as I pick up my laptop and walk in, leaving the door as it is. Josh is sitting at his desk, writing on a legal pad. He looks up and grins at me.

"How're you?"

"I'm fine. How are you?" I respond as I walk back to the couch and sit down. This will work. Just pretend like that little scene didn't happen. Perfect.

"If I join you over there on the couch, are you going to be able to keep your hands to yourself?" Oh. He's not done playing yet. Well, okay.

"Yes . . . _sir_." I say a little breathlessly, biting my lip.

"You are _so_ naughty." Josh responds with a laugh. But he stays in his chair. I win.

We work quietly for over an hour, then Margaret comes in with our lunch order. She walks over and sets it on the table. I get up and go sit down. We should be safe over there. Josh puts down the memo he's reading, but picks up a legal pad, before he walks over and joins me.

Once I've finished my soup, he clears his throat.

"I know you haven't really wanted to talk about this, but don't you think we probably should before the meeting with Ron?"

"I guess." I say reluctantly.

"Have you thought of any more names?"

"Not really. I have tried! But I don't really like to think about bad dates, you know."

"Did you date a guy named Fern once? That names been rolling around my head since last night."

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm sure I'd remember if I dated a guy named Fern!" Oh wait! I remember Fern.

"I did sit next to a guy named Fern at that stupid Teddy Tomba Seminar you made me go to."

Josh writes his name down on the legal pad.

"Do you remember his last name?"

"Don't put him on the list! He was, like, 80 years old!"

"I thought you said he hit on you."

I grin at him. I did let him think that. "Josh, he was old . . . I didn't say he was dead."

"Well, you always have had a thing for older men. And god knows, I'm still going to hit on you when I'm 80!"

"So what about other people you didn't date. Um, I guess people that you interacted with at work? Were there any Congressmen or aides that hit on you?"

Ugh. This is exactly why I haven't wanted to talk to him about this. Of course there have been! In a town like this?! Come on. I can't even count the number of times my ass has been pinched at events. And there were a few, not many but a few, Congressmen that suggested that there were things I could do to persuade them to vote the way Josh wanted them to.

Now I have to decide whether to lie or tell him the truth. Neither option is appealing.

"Donna?" He says softly taking my hand. I look up into his eyes, and I can see that he already knows the answer because of my hesitation.

"You really don't want to know." I tell him softly. He closes his eyes for a moment. Then opens them. He looks determined.

"Yes. I do."

I close my eyes for a moment and pray for strength. This could be a make or break moment in our marriage. I decide to start with an easy one, just to see how he'll react.

"Reeler"

"New York Second?"

"Yes"

"What did he do?"

"He grabbed my ass."

"When?" Every chance he got. I think to myself, but I give Josh one example.

"DTripleC Fundraiser 2002"

"During his campaign for reelection?" Josh says incredulously, as he writes him on the list. And he thinks I'm the naïve one. I just shrug.

"Next?"

"Senator Jenkins" Shit. I hadn't intended to mention him. That slipped out. Josh's head pops up. He considers Jenkins an ally.

"What did he do?" I feel my face turn red. I shouldn't have mentioned him. How do I get out of this?

Josh isn't letting it go. "Donna, what did he do?"

I decide to downplay it.

"Nothing specific. It was just how he looked at me." I hope he leaves it at that. That was a truthful answer. Let's move on.

"Did he ever say anything?"

"Yes." I whisper. It's been a long time but I can still hear the words ringing in my ears.

"What did he say?" I close my eyes. I don't want to see the look in Josh's eyes when I tell him.

"He said he was a more powerful man than you, that he could put my talents to better use, and I'd end up better rewarded for my efforts."

I feel my eyes getting wet. This is the moment all women dread. The moment you wait to see if someone believes you. Those words by themselves- they mean nothing, they can easily be spun as a misunderstanding, but they way he looked at me when he said them, I have no doubt what he meant. And in this moment, if Josh doesn't see it the same way, then there is no point in continuing this conversation. In a town like this, the more powerful you are the more you get the benefit of the doubt. No one wants to risk alienating their allies. It's why women say nothing.

"Baby. I'm sorry. If I'd known that I'd have kept him far, far away from you." Josh runs his hand down my face brushing the tears away. I open my eyes and meet his. They are filled with sadness and love. Then he closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.

"Are there others?"

"Thiele"

"Rhode Island?"

"Yes."

"What did he do?"

"He suggested some things I could do to help persuade him to vote to confirm Russell as VP."

"Oh my god." Now Josh looks pissed. Thiele did end up voting to confirm. Josh didn't know why. This time I don't look away. I look him in the eye and wait for him to ask.

"I know you. I know you'd do anything for me. But not that. So how did you persuade him?"

"I didn't."

"You didn't?"

"No. Ryan Pierce did." Josh looks hurt for a minute, does he think I went to Ryan? I clarify.

"I didn't tell Ryan anything. I don't know how Ryan convinced him. You'll have to ask him. If it matters."

"How many more?" Josh sounds weary. This list could destroy him. He thought he was protecting me all those years. And maybe he was, maybe if he hadn't it would have been much, much worse.

"Josh, I don't think that Ron really knew how long the list would be if he wanted to know about every guy that ever hit on me. I think he just wants the ones that I think could be still carrying a torch. Let's talk to him a little more about it before we go any further, okay?"

"I have one more question."

"Okay."

"Hoynes?" I was hoping he wouldn't ask me that. I'm very, very tempted to lie so I say nothing.

"I'll kill him."

"Josh. Listen. He offered. I declined. Let it go."


	31. Chapter 31

I have two emotions battling inside me right now. Sadness and rage. I am pushing the rage down. For now. I really thought that I protected her all those years. That the ugly side of this town hadn't touched her. I was a fool. And the brilliant woman that she is, she knew that this conversation probably wouldn't do us any good. That's why she's been avoiding it. She knows that she'd need a lot more than a bad vibe to accuse a Senator.

But watching her sit there wondering if I would believe her. That's the part that broke my heart. It's bad enough to think that she didn't feel like she could tell me back then, when some of these things happened, but to think that she still wasn't sure how I'd react now? She's my wife! What can I do to convince her I'm on her side no matter what?

"Why didn't you tell me? Did you think I wouldn't believe you?"

"Some of those men would have destroyed me if I'd accused them. And if you'd tried to defend me, they would have destroyed you too."

It's a small comfort to think that it wasn't that she didn't trust me, it was that she was trying to protect me. A very small comfort.

"Let's sit on the couch for a bit." I need to hold her, to whisper in her ear how much I love her, and how I'll always believe her, and I'll do anything to keep her safe.

When I look at my watch, I see it's almost one. As much as I hate to move, we need to keep our meeting with Ron. I just really hope he's made some progress on the case.

When we get to Ron's office, he leads with the latest development.

"We intercepted another email around 10 this morning."

Donna braces herself then asks-

"What does it say?"

["I saw you with him yesterday. The way he puts his hand on you makes me sick. You're letting him control you again. He kept us apart once. It won't happen twice."]

"He was there?" Donna's eyes get wide.

"Probably not. There was television coverage of the group arriving and leaving the school. It's more likely that he saw it on television. But we do have surveillance photos of the crowds. We'll want you to look at those and see if anyone looks familiar."

"Okay."

"Why do you think it's more likely that he saw it on TV, Ron?" I'm curious.

"Mostly because of the timing of the email. He's clearly annoyed or angry by your presence. If he'd seen the event live, he probably would have sent an email right away. But if he didn't see it until the 5 or 6pm news then he didn't have time to get to a library before it closed."

"What else do we know?" I ask him. He looks at Donna.

"Based on the last two emails it seems a bit more likely that it is someone you've had actual contact with.

"Why is that?" She asks.

"The comment about seeing you on crutches. We haven't found any old news clippings of you when you were on crutches. The footage of you coming back from Gaza you were in a wheelchair. The comment about Josh controlling you also just doesn't seem to fit if the stalker's only information about you came through media."

"We were going over people who have harassed Donna in the past. Like, senators that got grabby or made suggestive comments. Do you think it could be someone like that?"

"It could be but stalkers who send messages like this generally have fairly low self-esteem. People who are powerful, high-profile in this town would stalk more like an ex-boyfriend. They'd use their power and position to try to wear you down. They wouldn't do it anonymously."

So I'd like you to try think about small incidents, maybe someone you wouldn't normally notice, maybe an aide or a clerk. Focus on the time after you came back from Gaza. Perhaps an appointment that you had to cancel where you mentioned that Josh needed you to work.

I want to meet again tomorrow at 1 to go over our strategy for Monday, but if you think of any thing you think might be useful before then you can call me.

"What are you thinking for Monday?" I ask him.

"Honestly, Josh, I'm not sure yet. It's gone from one email a week to 4 in this week. The photo with the red dress really seems to have escalated things.

"Haven't you been able to review security footage from the libraries?"

"We have reviewed the footage. Not all the libraries have video surveillance. The ones that do have a tape over feature, so we don't have any footage from the emails sent prior to the inauguration. The five emails sent since then have all been sent from different libraries. Only 2 of those libraries have video surveillance of the computer area. During the time the emails were sent, there were several persons who used the computers. There is one person that appears to be the same. We think its a male. Both times wearing a baseball cap, keeping his face away from the camera."

"Don't the libraries require a card to use the computers?"

"Yes, but the "proof of residency" to get a library card is pretty low. It's fairly easy to get one under a fake name and address."

"Can't you stake out the libraries?"

"There are over 30 libraries in the greater DC area. He hasn't used the same one twice since December. We don't have the resources. And even though I absolutely think this is a potentially dangerous situation, it's still not an explicit threat."

"What if I hire a private investigator?"

Ron looks at me curiously. I haven't advertised that I'm financially comfortable. It's not that I have endless wealth but we have enough and frankly even if we didn't I'd do whatever it took to keep Donna safe.

"Well, it would potentially be a large undertaking, but if someone was present and able to get a better photograph of the person, at least Donna could see if she recognized him, and we could also work on image searching. But I have to tell you- it's not as easy as they make it look on TV. It's very time consuming."

Ron pauses a few seconds then continues.

"If we are thinking along these lines, it might be better to have Donna reply and suggest an alternative location for Monday's meeting. Then we'd know where he'd be- even if we don't know who it is yet, we could make sure it's some place where we can get photographs/video."

"I don't want Donna to meet him!"

"No, of course not. She wouldn't be there. But we'd have investigators there. We'd get some surveillance. I do have to warn you. When Donna doesn't meet him on Monday- this could get ugly fast."

"I'm already not going to meet him on Monday." Donna says. "I don't see the down side to trying to change the terms so we can get more information."

"Let's discuss this further tomorrow." Ron says. "I'll work on a plan and then we'll see how we all feel about it. In the meantime, what are your plans for the rest of this weekend?"

"We are hanging out at Sam and Ainsley's tonight. I think we're going to order in."

"What about tomorrow?"

"Lazy Sunday at home."

"No plans to go out?"

"No, only coming here at 1."

"Okay. I'm glad to hear that. I haven't asked you to alter your plans before now, but I think it might not be a bad idea to lay low for a bit. Especially Monday- no impromptu Starbucks runs. The last thing we want is for you to accidently be where he wants you to be."

"How're you feeling?" I ask Donna as we walk back to my office after the meeting with Ron.

"This is starting to feel kind of serious. I'm really worried about you."

"Me?!"

"Well yes. 'He who shall not be named' seems to still like me. But you, my friend, he has a problem with."

"Well, that's not really anything new. Is it?" I give her a little grin. I appreciate her trying to be light-hearted. This day has been really taxing. "So do you still want to go to Sam and Ainsley's tonight?"

"God, yes, I could use some mindless chatter about wedding stuff. Maybe you and Sam can watch some sort of sports on TV?"

"What time are they expecting us?"

"Whenever. I told them we'd see if they were still here when we were done. I don't need to go back to the house if you don't."

"I'm good."

We stop by Sam's office first. No one's there and the bull pen is empty. It is after 2pm on Saturday. I really don't expect anyone to be here, and I'm kind of glad they aren't.

"Should we check Ainsley's office?"

"Nah, let me just call." Donna pulls her cell phone out and hits 3. I wonder who's spot Ainsley took.

"Hey Ains. Are you guys still in the building? . . . Okay. We'll finish here and be there in a bit. . . . Probably half an hour."

"They're almost home. They stopped to pick up beer and cupcakes."

It suddenly hits me that we are standing in front of my old office and no one is around. I pull her inside and shut the door and lock it. I'm not going to take any chances. I walk over to the other doors and make sure they are locked as well. When I turn around Donna's standing there biting her lip, her eyes are bright and shining. I think this day is about to get a whole lot better.

We just stand and stare at each other for a few minutes. We are both breathing heavily and we haven't even moved. Are we really going to do this? And if we are, are we making it a game?

And suddenly, I don't want to. It's not a game. We sacrificed a lot of time to keep this honorable. In this room she was my assistant, and I would never screw my assistant. And I don't want to pretend that I would.

"I love you. I would never do anything that would discredit you. I am appalled by men that use their power to diminish women. I'm sorry that I was so egotistical that I assumed that just because you worked for me you'd never face any of that. I'm sorry I didn't protect you better."

I give her a gentle kiss on her lips and wrap my arms around her. I want her memories of this office to be that she was loved and cared for. Not that she was a sexual object. Not by me. Not even for play.

A half hour later, we're standing in the hall with Kevin while Susan does a sweep of Sam and Ainsley's townhouse. I really don't get the benefit of this.

"Hey guys!" Ainsley greets us once we're finally allowed in. "I gotta tell you that's a little weird. I mean, what do they think, we lured you here to knock you off so Sam can get a promotion?! And if we did, would we make it so obvious that they could tell during a 3 minute sweep? I mean, if we were going to kill you, we'd use poison or something." She wiggles her eyebrows, "want a cupcake?" She grins picking up a tray.

Donna starts to laugh. "SURE!" She says as she picks one up and takes a huge bite.

"She's quite a little minx, hmm, Sam."

"You know, she really is."

"Sam, Josh, you wanna beer?" Ainsley offers, before Sam can elaborate.

"Yes, please." I take my coat off and hand it to Sam.

"Donna?" He asks her.

"Oh right." She sets her cupcake on the table and quickly sheds her coat so that she can go back to eating. I'm relieved to see her finish it off. I have been really worried. She's starting to lose weight, and she really doesn't have any to spare.

I wrap my arms around Donna's waist and tuck my head over her shoulder. She's standing looking at the dining room table, which is covered with papers.

"What's all this?" I ask as Ainsley walks back in with the beer.

"Wedding planning lists and samples. Donna said you were going to help me."

"Wedding planning's easy. Just elope." I grin at Sam. "I got a guy. Ken's the best."

"Oh no! Don't be a bad influence on him! Okay, Josh, you're off the hook. Go over there and watch sports or something. Donna will help me."

"Okay, I'm just telling you in a couple months you're going to wish you'd listened to me."

"Shoo!" Ainsley says making hand gestures at me. I head over to the living area and plop down on a couch. I love the open floor plan in their town house. Sam and I can hang out in here and still see the girls over there. I just feel better when I can see her. Sam gives Ainsley a kiss and I hear him say- "I'll be right over there if you need my input, but I'm sure that you and Donna will plan the perfect wedding."

Sam sits down and we start to flip through the channels looking for something to watch. Twice through the channels confirms there are literally no sports on TV today. Our choice is some sort of pre-game recap for tomorrow's Super Bowl or the Duke basketball game from yesterday that Sam recorded. Since neither is the Mets, I couldn't care less. Twenty days until Spring Training.

Sam turns on the Duke Basketball game. We already know that Duke won so it's really not holding my attention.

"Sam. . . " Ainsely calls from the other room. "can you come look at these invitations?" He gets up and trots over to her.

"That one." I hear him say. "Okay . . . the other one. . . . Either is fine with me, cupcake."

He comes back a few minutes later. I grin at him. This should be more fun to watch than basketball. I look at my watch. Five minutes later,

"Sam . . . ."

"Yes, honey?"

"What do you think about Chili Pepper?"

"In what?"

"As the color of the bridesmaid's dresses."

"Um, it's fine with me." Poor Sam. He'd really like to be watching this basketball game. I give him one more question before he has to give it up and go in there. Duke's on a roll, this could be a decent game.

"Sam . . ." He rolls his eyes. He'd better be careful.

"Caribbean or Hawaii?"

Eloping. Best. Decision. Ever.


	32. Chapter 32

Sam comes running when Ainsley mentions the honeymoon. She grins at me. She's very smart. Josh comes along behind ready to watch the show.

"Sam, Donna has been telling me all about Maui. I know we planned to go to Aruba, but I'm thinking about reversing your position."

"Reversing my position?"

"Yes, reversing your position that it makes the most sense to go to the Caribbean for our honeymoon."

"Start at the beginning."

"Can I have another cupcake?"

"Take the cupcake and start at the beginning."

"Donna was telling me about all the great things they did in Maui. Whale watching, Dinner Cruises, Luaus, there's a Lavender Farm!"

"And golf," Josh says, "don't forget the golf."

"There's golf in the Caribbean too." Sam says.

"I like golf." Ainsley says. "Hey, when the weather's nice we should all go golfing."

Josh grins at me. Man! How did that happen?

"Cupcake, did you and Donna talk about how long the flight is to Hawaii?"

"Yes."

"So you don't mind spending an extra 5 or 6 hours on a plane?"

"No."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Okay."

"Well that happened fast."

Sam kisses her forehead. "We play with live ammo around here."

"So you don't want to talk about it some more?"

"Not really. Where-ever you want to go is fine with me as long as there's a beach and you in a very tiny bikini. What's next?"

"Well, I think I've settled on a color scheme. With a fall wedding, I think we just have to go with those colors. I think I want to focus on this red- it's called Chili Pepper. Then accents of Sage, Flame Orange, Chocolate. I'm thinking Brown Suits instead of tuxes." Ainsley says barely taking a breath, laying color samples and ending pointing to an open magazine. "Donna likes these bridesmaid dresses."

Josh and Sam look a little stunned.

Finally, Sam recovers and chuckles "She does, does she?"

"Yes."

"Well as long as Donna's happy, I'm good."

"A very wise philosophy!" Josh pipes up. But I'm feeling kind of bad. It was fun picking all this out with Ainsley but it isn't my wedding.

"But it's your wedding. It doesn't really matter what dress I like."

"Sure it does."

"It does?"

"Well, I hope you'll be a bridesmaid! You will won't you Donna? My sister's going to be the Matron of Honor but she lives in Georgia and has three kids. She's not going to be much help. And you've already done so much!"

"Well, I'm honored. Of course! I'd love to be a bridesmaid." I didn't really expect that. We're friendly, and hanging out over the last few weeks have been fun, but I didn't think I ranked in the bridesmaid category yet. But this feels really nice. This is the most relaxed we've been in a couple weeks.

"Josh, you're my best man, right?"

"Always."

"Can we order dinner now? I'm really hungry." We all smile at Ainsley. That girl can eat.

After dinner, Sam and Josh take another shot at the basketball game while Ainsley and I address envelopes for "Save the Date" cards.

"Hey Ainsley- do you have stamps for these?"

"Not yet."

"You should see if you can get some with a fall theme. Maybe leaves or some flowers that match the color scheme of the wedding."

"Will anyone notice?"

"Well, some of your guests might be into stamp collecting."

"Philately is FUN!" Josh shouts from the other room. Yes it is.

Later, I'm heading to the bathroom when I hear a bit of Sam and Josh's conversation.

"I don't know. There are just days when I think she'd be better off without me. I haven't been good for her." Hearing Josh say that stops me in my tracks. I cover my mouth, the thought makes me want to vomit.

"Hey, no more beer for you. It's a depressant, and you my friend, are depressed enough."

"God, Sam wouldn't you feel the same way? What if Ainsley was being stalked and it was all your fault?"

"It's NOT your fault Donna's being stalked. It's NOT your fault you brought her to DC. You don't even know what her life would be like if she'd never met you. But I can guarantee one thing. It WOULDN'T be better. I know she'd agree with that. Now, snap out of it or I'm going to have her come in here and kick your ass."

I'm glad Sam is setting him straight. He needs to hear it from someone other than me. But if I have to I will go in there and kick his ass. This isn't his fault. It's just one of those things. On the way back from the bathroom, I pause again. It seems like Josh and Sam have moved on to other things. I detour through the living room and stop to give Josh a quick kiss.

"Not that I mind, but what was that for?"

"Just a reminder."

"Okay."

"Hey Ainsley, the game's over. Let's watch a movie." Sam calls out. Good idea Sam. I sit down on the couch next to Josh. A few minutes later Ainsley walks in with popcorn and a bottle of wine. OH! Good idea, Ainsley!

By the end of the night, I'm curled up on the couch with my head on Josh's thigh. He's running his hand through my hair. The movie is supposed to be a romantic comedy but I'm not really in the right frame of mind to really appreciate the humor in something called "The Break Up" even though I do like Jennifer Ainston. We should have just watched "Friends" I know Sam got Ainsley the complete series on DVD for Christmas. But once I stopped paying attention to the movie and just snuggled into Josh it ended up being a good night.

"Thanks for having us over." I tell Ainsley as Sam's getting our coats. "This is exactly what we needed tonight."

"Well thanks for all your help with the wedding. Sam doesn't really seem that invested in the details."

"I'm happy to help. Looking through all the bridesmaid dresses was really fun. Hopefully we can go to the Boutique next weekend and try on some of the styles."

On the way home Josh intertwines his fingers with mine. "Are you sorry that you didn't get to plan our wedding?"

"GOD NO!"

"Really? It looked like you were having a good time with Ainsley."

"I was, but it's more fun when it's no pressure. You've met my Mother and my Sister. Do you think it would have been fun planning a wedding with them?"

"Excellent point."

"Our wedding was perfect." I give him a long kiss. "We waited long enough to figure out what we wanted. I'm glad that once we did, we didn't wait even one day longer. I've never regretted eloping and I'll never regret marrying you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me." I give him another long kiss as we pull up in front of the Brownstone. "Now why don't you take me inside and remind me what the honeymoon was like."

When we finally get out of bed it no longer qualifies as Sunday morning, but neither of us can stop smiling. We didn't get much sleep last night, but it was worth it. He served me breakfast in bed, around 10. Then since things got a little sticky, we took a bath.

"You're either going to keep me young or kill me." Josh snickers on the ride to the White House.

After the initial greeting, this meeting with Ron is feeling a little like an interrogation. He's asking questions like my Dad used to, tough and unrelenting.

"We need to talk about your lifestyle after you got back from Germany. Who'd you go out with?"

"I didn't really date after Gaza." I'm sort of embarrassed. I don't really like to talk about this. Josh and I just want to move on. "I had a fling with a photojournalist while I was there. Colin Ayres. He was on the list. When I got back, I broke it off immediately. I haven't dated anyone since then."

"Blarney Boy." Josh mutters under his breath.

"Did anyone ask you out during that time? Did you get any fan mail? Get well wishes?"

"Well, yes. I did get a bunch of mail. You guys reviewed all of it. I never saw anything weird. I also got a lot of requests for interviews. At first I turned all of them down. I did end up doing one, eventually."

"Did any of them take the rejection personally?"

"I don't think so."

"Is there any place else that you met new people or maybe where you just talked to people you hadn't before?

But now my mind is racing. There's something. Something is tickling the back of my mind.

"Hold on a minute." I just need a minute to think. I'm trying to picture myself on crutches. Where did I go? Who did I see? I look at Josh. Ugh! Why can't I figure this out?!

"What is it?" He asks.

"I'm just trying to think. It feels like I should be remembering something. I didn't go that many places while I was still on crutches. Work, PT, Home. That's it."

"Break it down place by place, Donna." Ron tells me.

"We've already spent a lot of time thinking about work. What about home? Any new neighbors or any neighbors suddenly interested?" I close my eyes and think for a minute.

"Not that I can remember."

"What about PT? Who was the therapist? Did you met anyone there? Make any friends? "

"No, that's not how I do things."

Suddenly Josh and I make eye contact. That really rings a bell.

"You were on the phone." Josh says slowly. "Someone was pressuring you. You said that you'd thought it over and that's not how you do things."

"You grabbed the phone. You said "No, means no, leave her alone!" And you hung up on him."

"Who was that jerk, some slacker from Physical Therapy? I'll kick his ass!" Josh finishes the conversation softly.

"So who was it on the phone Donna? Was it someone from PT? What was happening?" Ron interrogates.

I close my eyes trying to remember. Ugh. I've really tried to block out everything that happened during that time. Josh and I were constantly rubbing each other wrong. Everything he said just irritated, and half the time he looked dumbfounded that I was even annoyed.

He hung up the phone, he walked away. He suggested I thank him because he had been chivalrous, when really it felt like he was domineering. Who was on the phone? What had happened earlier? I shake my head.

"I'm sorry Ron, I'm having a hard time remembering. And this feels really important."

"It's okay, baby, take your time. We'll figure it out." Josh rubs my arm soothingly.

"No. That's not helping. I think you have to say it like you would have back then. Maybe that will jog my memory. Tell me I should thank you for your chivalry."

Josh gathers himself then looks past me a little. I close my eyes again.

"Who's that jerk, some slacker from Physical Therapy? I'll kick his ass!" He says it in an irritated, slightly arrogant tone. "You could thank me for my chivalry." He says like he's just done me a favor.

"He wasn't from PT." I whisper, "He was a reporter. He wanted an exclusive. He'd been bugging me all week. He was really persistent, trying to sweet talk me into it. He wanted to take me out dinner, so we could talk. Of if I didn't want to go out, he said he could meet me at my place. It was getting creepy. I finally told him I'd sleep on it. The next day he sent flowers. When he called, I told him I wasn't comfortable. He was pressuring me too much and that's not how I did things. Then Josh came in and hung up on him." I open my eyes and smile.

"Was that helpful?"

"What was his name Donna?" Ron asks.

Ugh. I don't know. I close my eyes again and try to think. I shake my head I can't remember.

"Did you ever met him in person?" Ron asks again.

Did I? How'd he get my number? "He called on the White House line! There'd be phone records, right?"

"Yes, now we just have to narrow down the day this happened. Can you think of anything else?"


	33. Chapter 33

"It was around the time of the first casualty of the peace keeping mission." I say looking at Ron and Donna. As soon as we did the role-play, the whole thing came flooding back to me. It was one of those weeks from hell. Because it was one of the times I had thought I'd lost her.

When I got back from Germany, I spent a lot of time thinking about what had happened over there and wondering if anything would ever be the same. I thought about how I glad I was that I hadn't given into the urge to propose the minute she woke up. And how I was still fighting the urge to put my fist through a window because of Colin. The joy that when she woke up, I was the first person she asked for, tempered by the fact that she sent me back to the White House before she sent him away. I had spent the whole time over there trying to keep her from seeing that my heart was shattering and when I left my only comfort had been that at least she knew that even just as a friend, I wouldn't stop for red lights. But the weeks after she came back home were torturous.

Seeing Donna struggling and in pain was horrible, Leo's heart attack and CJ becoming COS made it hard for me to give Donna the time and attention that I wanted to, plus she seemed to really shut me out. She didn't want me hovering or helping. She wanted independence. On top of that I was struggling to hide how I really felt, and I couldn't even seem to find the rhythm our friendship was built on.

When I saw the flowers on her desk that week, I had assumed they were from Colin. She'd been back about a month and the flowers from everyone else in the world had finally died down. But I still hadn't been able to give her any of my own, so when I found the bouquet on her desk, I was really annoyed. When she caught me reading the card, I tried to be playful but she just chastised me. And then she said they weren't from Colin, so that meant I had another Gomer to worry about. Nothing felt right. Later when I heard her on the phone, sounding so uncertain, sounding confused, I was angry. I couldn't resist the urge to sweep in and take care of it. I just wanted her to let me take care of something for her. But apparently, I managed to mess that up too. Now this loser is fixated on getting her away from me.

Ron and Donna are just looking at me. I guess they are waiting for more information.

"I don't know the exact date. But it was that week. It was about a month after you got back. The plans for the Bartlet Library were unveiled, you had a different cast, and there was the first casualty."

"That's really helpful, Josh." Ron says, looking at a calendar to pinpoint the time frame. "We'll be able to look at the phone logs that week. You said he called a lot, right Donna?"

"Yes."

"Okay. If you can think of how you first were introduced or where he might have seen you that would be really helpful. Because then we can figure out where he wants to meet tomorrow."

"Was he part of the White House Press Pool?" I ask Donna.

"No, he worked for some news magazine. But not one of the major ones, something I had never heard of." Ron and I exchange a look. Maybe he wasn't a reporter at all. He could have just told Donna that so she'd talk to him and possible meet him.

Ron and I are both quiet, trying to give Donna time to see if she remembers anything. Finally she says, "I'm sorry. That time is so hard for me to think about. I can't remember anything else." She sounds defeated, like she's made a mistake or that she's to blame. I can't have that. She hasn't done anything wrong.

I pick up her hand and stroke the top of it. "None of this is your fault. You are doing great. I'm sorry we've been tough on you this afternoon."

"But I want to remember! I want to make this go away!" She cries out. I can tell she's frustrated.

Ron seems to sense this too. "Let's get someone working on getting the call logs for that week. Will you give me a minute?" He steps out of his office.

"C'mere." I stand up and open my arms. Donna comes over and puts her head on my shoulder. I rub her back and try to soothe her. I wish I _could_ make this all go away for her.

Ron comes back into the room a few minutes later.

"Linda will bring in the telephone records shortly." He walks around his desk and sits down. Donna sighs and sits back down in her chair too. I slide my chair closer to her before I sit down.

"So, how is the wedding planning coming?" Donna looks surprised at Ron's question. But she starts to smile as she answers.

"Really good. They are getting married in Ashville in September. The church has all these stone arches, and the colors are going to be gorgeous. Josh is the best man, and I'm going to be a bridesmaid."

"Do they know where they are going to honeymoon yet?"

"They haven't booked anything yet, but Ainsley is really thinking Maui now. You know that's where Josh and I got married." Donna is legitimately smiling now. "It's a long plane ride, but it's worth it. I just loved it so much. I know they would too."

I see what Ron's doing. He's trying to get her to relax and think about something else. Then maybe when we get back to it she'll be refreshed and think of something new related to the case.

"What was your favorite thing about Maui?" Ron asks. Donna turns a little pink. Dumb question, Ron. It was our honeymoon. Our favorite part was the almost non-stop sex!

"The Lavender farm!" We both say at the same time.

"Really?" Ron says, but then Linda walks in and hands him some papers and we are saved from explaining.

"Okay. Here's the White House Telephone Records for that week. It looks like a Chris Rhoades called you 9 times that week. Does that name sound familiar? While he's asking, Ron does a google search.

"Chris?" Donna says "Yeah, I guess so. I mean that's a pretty common name."

"Okay. It looks like Chris Rhoades was a columnist for _The National Interest_ in 2005."

Ron picks up the phone and dials the number. After a few seconds, he hangs up. "The phone number is still registered to _The National Interest_. The office opens at 9am Monday."

"So Ron, do you think this is the guy?" I ask him.

"I don't know. It sounds like a possibility. We'll definitely treat him as a suspect. Donna, I want you to think for a few more minutes about anything else you can remember about this guy. Try to think backwards through the process, any little details could be helpful. Then I'm going to show you his picture and see if you recognize him or remember anything else. Okay? While you are doing that I'm going to get some water for all of us."

Ron leaves the room. I think he just wanted to give us some privacy.

"Let's go sit on the couch." Maybe if she's comfortable and feels secure she might remember something else. She tucks her feet up under her and puts her head on my chest. I wrap one arm around her and stroke her hair. We sit there quietly until Ron returns. He sits at his desk and watches us for a few minutes with a fond smile on his face.

"Donna?" I wonder if she fell asleep? She sits up and sighs.

"I'm sorry. I just don't remember anything else. I don't remember meeting him. Can you show me the photo?"

"Sure, come on over here." Ron answers her.

Ron shows us a picture of a slightly balding, bland man. He doesn't look particularly intimidating or threatening. I feel kind of relieved. I'm pretty sure I could kick his ass.

"Well Donna?"

"No. He doesn't look familiar to me. If I met him in person I don't remember it."

"That's okay. Remember, you might not have. This still has a lot of the ear markings of a "celebrity" type stalking. He could have seen news footage of you, decided that he was going to land an interview, and then romanticized it. He could have seen you in person even if you didn't meet him. If this is even the right guy."

The phone rings and Ron picks it up.

"Okay. Thanks." He turns back to his computer and pulls up a screen. It looks like Donna's email inbox.

"Another email?" I ask him.

"Yes, it just came through." He reads it out loud.

[I can't wait to see you tomorrow. We belong together.]

"They are tracing it now."

"Are we going to respond?" I ask Ron while I squeeze Donna's hand. "Try to change the date and location?"

"Not yet. Now that we have an idea of who it could be I'd rather not engage. We'll investigate Chris Rhoades. We'll see if he has an alibi for the times the emails were sent. We'll track down his address and have some agents have a conversation with him, see if he admits to contacting Donna. If he does we'll deliver a cease and desist letter. We have to remember that there have been no specific threats, and probably he hasn't done enough to use the stalker laws against him. We don't actually want to agree to meet or invite him somewhere- once we communicate with him we want it to be a clear message that he needs to stop contacting her."

"What if he doesn't admit to sending the emails?"

"Well at that point I might suggest that you hire a private investigator. Without a threat, I won't be able to put an agent on him all the time, even if we think he's doing this. A private investigator following him would probably be able to get proof that he's the one stalking her. Once we have proof that its him, we catalog all contact and we try to get him prosecuted under the DC Stalker Law."

"Is there any reason I shouldn't hire a PI right now?"

"Give me until Monday. Hopefully I'll be able to eliminate or confirm it's him by then. We have agents on the way to the library with his photo. Maybe someone will have seen him."

"So what do we do now Ron?"

"Now you go home. You try to relax, enjoy the rest of your day. Don't look at your email. We'll take care of that. We'll make sure your agents have this photo. He won't be allowed near you. Obviously, this guy will be held by security if he tries to gain access to the White House. I've got Linda checking to make sure he doesn't have current press credentials. I'd like you both to stay in the White House on Monday. Don't go out to lunch, no meetings on the hill, no Starbucks runs. And I'd like to meet with you before you head home on Monday, we'll talk about where things stand then."

"Okay."

"Thanks, Ron."

Once we are back in the town car, Donna molds herself to my side and rests her head on my shoulder. When I look down I see that her eyes are closed. It's less than a 10 minute ride home so she normally doesn't do this. She looks really tired. We really didn't get much sleep last night, but we really needed to be with each other.

I glance at my watch. It's just after 3. We ate breakfast around 10. I think she could use a nap and some food and I want to meet all her needs. God. I love her so much.

"Are you hungry?" I ask softly in case she really did fall asleep. If she did, I'm going to make Mark drive around for an hour.

"Not really."

"You need to eat something. Maybe a nap first though?"

"That sounds nice."

"Okay, well we're just about home. So just hold on a few minutes."

When we get to the apartment Donna heads straight to the bedroom. She kicks off her shoes and peels down her jeans. I can't help but be turned on by the sight of her cheeky panties, but I don't want anything, but for her to crawl into bed and sleep for a bit.

As soon as she's under the covers, I turn to leave the room. But her plea stops me-

"Josh. . . can you just hold me?"

I kick off my shoes, take off my jeans, and crawl into bed. She rolls over and puts her head on my chest and tangles up our legs. I wrap my arms around her and hold her tight.

"I promise, I'll never let you go." I whisper to her before I drift off to sleep myself.

I wake up to the smell of something really good. I roll over and reach out to Donna, but the bed next to me is empty. I sit up suddenly. Disoriented. I haven't woke up to an empty bed in almost 3 months. Where is she?

"DONNA!" I bellow. My heart is pounding a little as I scramble out of bed.

"Hey sleepyhead" She pokes her head in from the kitchen. "Nice nap?"

"What time is it?" I ask as I pull my jeans on. This is why I never nap- I usually feel worse.

"Almost 5. You hungry?"

"Yeah. Are you cooking something?"

"I'm making chocolate chip cookies." She puts a spoonful of something in her mouth.

"Did you just eat raw cookie dough?!" Ohmygod. That's so gross. And dangerous. Raw eggs can make you sick.

"Um, no?" She looks guilty. I'm sure that's exactly what she just did. Well, this calls for a little harassment.

I raise an eyebrow and she hides the spoon behind her back. Oh. She's definitely playing a game here.

I keep eye contact as I advance on her. "I think you're lying to me." I say as I gather her in my arms "Do you know what happens to naughty little girls that lie?" I whisper in her ear. Then I pick her up and carry her to the bed and start to tickle her. She's grinning and giggling. I'm about to kiss her in spite of the raw egg she just ate, when a timer goes off.

"Saved by the bell!" She says, pushing me away. I follow her to the kitchen and watch as she pulls a tray of cookies out out of the oven. They smell delicious.

"Is that dinner? Or should I order something?"

"You should order something. We'll have the cookies for dessert. I have a couple more trays to put in." She slides another tray into the oven. Then takes another spoonful of dough and eats it. I shudder. It makes me feel a little queasy.

"You know, that really isn't safe. I wish you wouldn't do that. You could get food poisoning or something."

"Josh."

"Yeah?"

"Go order the food."


	34. Chapter 34

I wake up in a cold sweat and sit straight up in bed. My heart is pounding in my ears. I don't remember the dream. Just a flash, a loud noise and a feeling of terror. I wipe the tears away and try to control my breathing. I look over at Josh. I'm relieved that he's still sleeping.

I take a deep breath in through my nose and blow it out slowly. Nope, my heart is still racing. I try again. In through the nose, one, two, three, four, five, out through the mouth, one, two, three, four, five. I wipe my eyes again.

It's been a while since I had to do this. Almost every night for months after the explosion, sporadically on the campaign trail, not once since November. I think I just spent too much time today thinking about what it was like after Gaza. Okay, one more time. In . . .

"Donna?" Josh mumbles.

. . . Out. I look over at Josh and try to smile, but I'm not very successful, and there are still tears rolling down my cheeks. He sits up.

"What's wrong?" His voice has a slightly panicky tone, which is exactly why I didn't want to wake him up. I take his hand and give it a little squeeze and do the breathing exercise one more time for good measure, hoping that my voice will sound normal when I respond. The breathing tips him off.

"Oh. Nightmare?"

"Yeah."

"When did you start having these again?"

"Tonight."

"Do you want a drink? Do you need some medication?"

"Yes, and no. I should be okay. I don't like to take a pill. I haven't needed any since I've been able to sleep with you." Now I'm able to give him a real smile.

He gets up and goes to the kitchen. A minute later he comes back with a glass of water.

"So what you're saying is that I put you to sleep? I'm boring?" He banters with me. It feels good. I'd rather try to get back to normal than have him coddle me.

I let out a large yawn and he chuckles.

"I swear that wasn't fake."

"C'mere." He says as he climbs back into bed. I take a long drink then snuggle into him. I don't need a sleeping pill. I just need to listen to his heart beating steadily. He runs his hand over my hair and a few minutes later, were both back to sleep.

When I wake up again, I hear the treadmill and CNN. Josh's morning routine is comforting. I know I can lay here if I want to, and if I fall back asleep he'll wake me later. But I've had enough sleep and I don't really want to lay here and worry about what might happen today. I kind of want to get into the office and find out if Ron has any more information. It feels like if we know who the Stalker is, we'll be able to deal with it.

The treadmill stops and a few minutes later, Josh walks into the bedroom. He's kind of gross, dripping sweat, but it's kind of sexy too. It really makes me happy that he's taking care of himself again.

"Oh hey. You're awake early. You okay?"

"Yep. Just done sleeping. You want some company in the shower?"

"Well, yeah." He grins at me.

Later, when I'm blow drying my hair, he wraps his arms around me and gives me another little kiss behind my ear.

"That was a nice way to start the day." He says meeting my eyes in the mirror.

We've just discovered that not every shower encounter has to include actual sex. It's kind of nice just to touch each other, and kiss a little and just be together. I might make more of an effort to get up a little earlier from now on.

"It really was. I love you. We belong together."

We are running ahead of schedule by the time I'm ready. Of course, the one morning we could make a Starbucks run, we've promised Ron that we won't. I walk into the kitchen and find Josh almost done getting the coffee ready to go. The toaster pops up with English Muffins.

"I thought you might be getting sick of bagels." He tells me off-handedly. He's really jumped into this "in charge of breakfast" thing. I think it checks a lot of boxes for him. He gets to be in charge, he gets to take care of me and it's a routine.

Living with him I've discovered he's much more scheduled than I realized. I always assumed that because he let me manage him when we worked together, that he couldn't or wouldn't manage himself. I've found out that it's just not true. If I stop and think about it, it could turn my world upside down. People assumed that I held that office together and that he couldn't function without me, but I'm starting to believe it's just that he didn't _want_ to function without me, and maybe he just let me believe that I was more valuable to him than I really was. I'm not really ready to explore this idea yet. At least now that were married, he's shown me that I'm valuable not for what I can do for him, but for who I am, and how I love him, and how he loves me. That's the only truth I really need to hold on to.

"What?" He says. I must have been staring at him.

"Nothing. I just really, really love you."

"I do make a pretty amazing breakfast." He quips.

Around 1, Karen buzzes. "You've got flowers! Can I bring them in?"

"Yes, please!" I get up as she walks through the door with a small bouquet.

"Where should I set them?"

"Coffee table is fine."

Karen hovers as I open the card.

[I'm not going anywhere.]

"Are they from Josh? They're pretty. Not as big as what he usually sends." She prattles on as I suddenly get a chill. I look at the flowers again. He said he was going to send roses, to match my office. Something's not right here.

"Hold on." I walk over to my desk and dial Josh's number. Margaret answers.

"Josh Ly. . ."

I cut her off. "Margaret, it's me. I need to talk to him. Right. Now."

A few seconds later Josh picks up.

"What's up?"

"Did you send me flowers?"

"No."

"I just got a delivery."

"DON'T TOUCH THEM! CALL RON. I'm on my way."

"Come on." I grab Karen's arm and drag her out of my office.

"Jackie- I just got a flower delivery. The card is not signed. They are not from Josh."

"Did you touch them?"

"I unwrapped them and took the card out of the holder."

"Come with me. You too." She says to Karen. "Run Hazmat protocol- Bulldog's office." Jackie says into her wrist.

"Where are we going? What about the rest of my staff?" I ask as she ushers me out the door. Four agents are running toward us. One follows behind us, one stands at the door, and the other heads into the office. I guess he'll take care of the rest of them.

"We're going to the decontamination unit. We'll follow the protocol until we get the all clear."

When we get to the decontamination unit, we are greeted by a Doctor.

"Are either of you feeling ill?"

"No." We both answer.

"Sneezing, runny nose, headache, itchy eyes? Anything, no matter how minor, I need to know about it."

"No, I'm fine."

"Me, too."

"Okay then, take a through shower, scrub vigorously. Wash your hair. There is a call cord in there. If you feel ill at all, pull the cord."

Well, this day just got a lot more interesting, I think to myself as I wash my hair. Josh is going to freak out. I, however, am relatively calm. I feel fine and there is no reason to think this guy is out to kill me. I'm sure the flowers weren't poisoned.

When I come out of the showers, dressed in my snazzy polyester track suit, Josh is pacing in the waiting room. I'm not surprised to see him. I'm actually only surprised that he didn't join me in the shower.

"Do we owe anyone an apology for the fact that you are in here?"

'What do you mean?"

"I mean, did you have to overpower an agent to gain access to this room?"

"No. Phil was with me. Once he told me that you were here, I just made it absolutely clear that he'd have to shoot me to stop me from joining you. I guess he decided that shooting me would be a conflict with his sworn duty to protect me."

"Thanks, Phil!" I call over to the agent guarding the door.

"You're welcome, Ms. Lyman."

"Do you know where the rest of my staff is?" I ask Josh.

"Yes, they are being held in the next room over. The system did not detect any contaminates in the FLOTUS suite. But agents are evaluating the flowers themselves with a portable unit. If the flowers come back clear, your staff won't have to go through the protocol. But Ron doesn't want them interacting with anyone else until there is an all clear. Since you and Karen touched the flowers, you had to immediately shower, but since you are not showing any symptoms, you can wait before proceeding with any further steps."

Josh stops and looks me all over. "Are you sure you feel okay?"

"Yes, Josh, I'm fine."

He pulls me into his arms and holds me.

"Thank you god." I hear him mumble under his breath.

A couple minutes later, Karen comes out in a matching track suit.

She looks at me and giggles.

"What?"

"I didn't want to look at myself in the mirror, but seeing you, I've got a pretty good idea what I look like."

"Well, I'll pull some strings and make sure you get to take that track suit home as a souvenir."

"Gee, thanks." She laughs. I'm glad she's in a good mood about this. I really did find a good assistant.

We are still giggling as Ron walks in.

"I've got good news. There were no contaminates on the flowers or the card."

"Good. Has someone told my staff?"

"Yes, they've been released to go back to the office."

"Great." I turn to Karen. "You can go too. I should be back in time for our 4 o'clock meeting. If not, we'll go over everything in the morning."

"Okay. Can I change first?"

"Can she, Ron?"

"Yes, of course."

Once Karen leaves the room, Ron pulls a card out of his pocket. "This was the card on the flowers, Donna?"

He shows it to me and I nod.

"May I?" Josh asks, and Ron hands it to him.

"I'm not going anywhere? Come on!"

I feel my eyes get wide as he reads it and I see the shock mirrored in Josh's eyes as well.

"That's what the card on the flowers said before!"

"Alright then." Ron nods. "Here's what happened this morning. At 9am, an investigator visited the offices of The National Interest. The current director informed us that Chris Rhoades has not worked there in about a year. He was let go due to increasingly erratic behavior. He was actually on probation at the time he was contacting you for an interview. He had indicated that he had an exclusive with you, the fact that he did not, combined with other behavior is why he was let go. The director gave us the last known address they had on file for him, which turned out to be his mother's address. We sent an agent over to meet him. He was not home when the agent arrived but he returned to the residence shortly after 11 a.m. When questioned, he admitted that he had contacted you in 2005 seeking an interview. He insisted it was strictly professional and that he had not contacted you since."

"That lying son of a bitch!" Josh is outraged. "Obviously it's him."

"Maybe not."

"Donna? After the flowers and that card?! It's gotta be."

"What do you think, Ron?"

"Well, after the interview was completed. The agent called me and requested permission to take a long lunch and use some personal time."

Ron smiles at Josh. Why is he telling us this? What's that got to do with anything?

"He waited down the block, then followed Mr. Rhoades, who drove to the Thrifty Florist near his house, then drove 20 minutes to the Deanwood Neighborhood library. Mr. Rhoades entered the library at 12:37. At 12:55 he exited the library. At 12:53, Donna received an email from the Deanwood Library."

"What did the email say?" I ask him. His shoulder slump a little.

[Nothing will keep us apart.]


	35. Chapter 35

Five days ago, Chris Rhoades thought that nothing would keep him from Donna. Delusional fool. I patiently waited for over 8 years for the timing to be right for Donna and me. I truly believe that we are soulmates, we will spend the rest of this life together, and then find each other again in the next. But this is our time now, and nothing will keep us apart, especially the Ultimate Gomer who still lives with his Mother.

Donna was still in good spirits on Monday, even after the Hazmat protocol. She laughed off the [Nothing will keep us apart] email. She looked me right in the eye and said "Well clearly, he's never met you." Damn straight. I don't find this a laughing matter, but I'm glad she knows that I'd never let a gomer get between us. When she went back to her office for her 4 o'clock meeting. I went back to mine and got down to business.

I'm a political operative. I know what it takes to win. Power. And 99% of power comes from knowledge or money. If you have both, it's very hard to lose. The first thing I did was hire a private investigation firm. Not a guy. A team. Not just any team. The best team. I wanted to know everything there was to know about the Ultimate Gomer. And I wanted to know it as soon as possible.

By the time we went to bed Monday night, I had a game plan. I held Donna, looked her in the eyes and told her not to worry, I had everything under control. She looked at me and smiled and slept peacefully through the night.

On Tuesday, the Ultimate Gomer's email read [I'll rescue you from him.] She wasn't laughing when she said, "I'm not a damsel in distress." I kissed her hand and told her she was a queen. If she needed to, she's capable of saving herself. God knows, she's saved me more than once. But this time, I told her it was my turn. "If there is any saving to be done. I'm the man for it." Then I had our lawyer file the paperwork for a personal protection order. The copies of the emails and affidavits from the agent and PI were enough to convince the judge that Chris Rhoades had sent them. When the PI served the Ultimate Gomer with the PPO, I had him deliver a little personal message as well. "The only way to have her is over my dead body."

On Wednesday, the Ultimate Gomer got bold, telling Donna- [You will be mine] and stupid, challenging me as well. His email telling me [You're not invincible] made me laugh. Donna went pale. But I reminded her, that while I'm not invincible, I am strong, and I am smart and I am powerful. And I will win. Ron added more agents to our detail. Our lawyer filed a motion to show cause on Donna's PPO. And I had him obtain a PPO on my behalf as well. I don't need a PPO to protect me, but since I won't be leaving Donna's side when she's out of the White House, any violation of her PPO has double the consequences. During her four o'clock meeting, I went shopping. I've got a little surprise planned for Valentine's Day.

On Thursday, the Ultimate Gomer sent me some advice- [Better get your affairs in order.] It's almost comical that he thought he was in control. His email to Donna said [It won't be long now.] He didn't know how right he was. I had my affairs in order. I'd lined up an easy way to deal with him and he walked right into it. Donna looked at me funny when I chuckled at the email. Then she'd asked- "Why are you so calm? You were freaking out more when the emails were less intimidating." I'd just smiled at her, "when we didn't know who it was and the emails were so vague, we didn't have enough knowledge to be powerful. Now we do." When we got home, I double checked the grocery list, there are a couple new recipes I think we should try. I'm thinking stew this weekend.

On Friday, Donna got a red dress in the mail and the Ultimate Gomer warned me- [You'll be spending Valentine's Day in the afterlife.] And that was the ball game. Because of the round the clock surveillance, I knew exactly when he headed toward the Brownstone. Donna and I were listening to Yo Yo Ma and making dinner. We had decided to make a 3 Cheese Soufflé. It's a little time consuming, it requires planning and concentration, but the pay-off is worth it. When the Ultimate Gomer showed up outside our apartment, Ron was there to arrest him immediately. I don't know why the Ultimate Gomer thought that he could get by the Secret Service with a Beretta in his hand. It's lucky for him they didn't shoot him. Although Ron thinks that maybe that's what he wanted. He had already sealed his fate when he sent the last email to me. It's a federal crime to send a death threat to a Government Official. The local DA is also prosecuting for the PPO violations. That's a big pile of charges against him. There won't be any bail. There will, however, be a suggestion that he plead guilty in order be committed to a mental prison instead of general population. Based on his medical history, I'm pretty sure he'll take that deal. In theory, he could be treated and eventually released, but in reality, I can promise that will never happen.

I love Saturday mornings. I get a lot of work done while Donna sleeps in, then I wake her up in a mutually satisfying way. Part of me thinks I should get out of bed, run on the treadmill, turn on the news, read some briefing memos. But I'm pretty content just to sit here, watching Donna sleep. There will be plenty of time this weekend for the other things. Maybe we'll go out to breakfast, or more likely, lunch. I'm sure she'd enjoy a Starbucks run. But until she's awake, I'll stay right here and thank god that she's mine. We have an amazing future ahead of us. We're already figuring out how to balance our jobs, our devotion to each other, and all the craziness that life can throw at us, we just have to take it one day at a time.


End file.
